Category: cheating101

Who Cheats More Men or Women?

Who Cheats More Men or Women

Are men more likely to cheat than women, or vice versa? It’s a classic debate, and the jury is still out. But when it comes to this age-old question, there are a few things we can all agree on. Men and women cheat for different reasons, and both have the same potential to be unfaithful.

It seems that men are slightly more likely to cheat than women, but this is more likely due to societal stereotypes than any hard scientific evidence. According to a survey conducted by AMI/Kelsey, 57% of men and 54% of women in the US reported that they had been unfaithful at some point in their lives.

There are many psychological factors that could contribute to men cheating, such as social pressure, a need for greater variety, or feeling neglected. Men may also be reacting to negative external forces, such as a bad home life or workplace pressure. In some instances, men may even be trying to dodge responsibility or to prove their masculinity.

Women, on the other hand, are more likely to cheat because of emotional dissatisfaction or a need to seek out new experiences. According to a study conducted by Helen Fisher, an anthropologist from Rutgers University, women are more likely to engage in affairs when there is an emotional rift in their primary relationships. Women may seek out new partners for validation, attention, or a chance to escape the monotony of life.

Regardless of who cheats more, both genders can suffer serious consequences. Cheating can lead to broken trust, feelings of betrayal and hurt, as well as toxic relationships. It can also have an effect on self-esteem and make it difficult to have healthy relationships in the future. Moreover, it could potentially result in legal difficulties and even miscarriages of justice.

If you’re suspicious that your partner is cheating or if you’re thinking of having an affair yourself, remember the do’s and don’ts. Don’t play detective, don’t take extreme measures to monitor your partner, and don’t hang your suspicions on thin evidence. Do, however, communicate and keep a dialog open with your partner, practice open honesty, and remember that monogamy is a two-way street.

Reasons Why Men Cheat

Reasons Why Men Cheat

We’ve all heard that old saying, ‘men are dogs‘, and while many of us hate to admit it, the saying could be true when it comes to a man’s fidelity. So why do guys cheat? Well, the reasons men cheat are varied – some stem from a need for something that’s missing in the relationship, while others feel the urge to step outside their relationship when feeling powerful emotions.

There are a few common reasons men cheat, and they range from the downright embarrassing to the outrageously ridiculous. Some guys cheat just because they can – they simply want to feel the thrill of getting away with it, or the thrill of pursuing someone that’s off limits. What can I say? Some dudes just like a challenge.

Then just like any other muscle, if you’re not using it, you’re losing it. So there’s the cheat for the sake of reassurance. In other words, some men will mess around just so they can feel good about themselves – as if they’re exercising their ‘manhood’ by snagging someone they probably never would’ve gotten in the first place.

Sometimes guys need to escape a relationship or try something new when it comes to getting some action. Limited resources indeed. So when that honeymoon period fades and real life kicks in, one too many beers can lead to man choice making the wrong kind of choice.

And when things get serious and that slew of in-laws and constant demands of commitment come into play, man will often use cheating to soothe the pressure. It’s like a time-out – he gets away for awhile and thinks about things for a bit.

The bottom line is that in general, men are just wired differently from women when it comes to cheating. It can be part instinct, part chemicals and all mustached manliness. Whatever the case, some men will still find ways to stick their hands into the cookie jar, regardless of the negative consequences. I mean that’s just how it is. Silly men.

Reasons Why Women Cheat

Reasons Why Women Cheat

Oh man, let me tell you, when it comes to why women cheat, it can be a wild mix of emotions and experiences that often lead to a woman making the decision to step out of her relationship and have an affair.

When it comes to the potential reasons why women cheat, it’s important to note that there is no single answer. Each situation is unique and takes place on an individual and circumstantial level. Regardless, here are some of the more popular explanations that are usually bubbling beneath the surface when it comes to why women stray from their partners.

One of the more common motivations for women who cheat is a lack of understanding from the partner. Whether it’s a low libido, a lack of recognition and appreciation, or a discrepancy between expectations from the relationship, when a woman’s needs aren’t being met by her mate, she may decide to take matters into her own hands and look for someone else who is willing to show her the kind of attention she desires.

Another potential reason revolves around the question of shared goals or a difference in communication styles. When two individuals have conflicting ideas about where the relationship is headed, or when their approaches to communication vary enough that it creates tension, a woman may decide to engage in a psychological and emotional escape, which is often done through an affair.

Finally, most people understand that when it comes to relationships infidelity can occur as a result of a lack of security and a fear of commitment. When faced with both of these feelings, some women may feel compelled to flirt and engage with another out of what feels like a reflexive need to maintain a sense of autonomy and the ability to explore multiple partners for the sake of freedom.

At the end of the day, it’s important to not reduce a woman’s complicated decision to make an affair occur in a simple cause and effect scenario. It’s important to recognize that the reasons for why women cheat may be simple but the complexity emerges from the concoction of cirucmstances that can lead to the decision. All of these theories don’t apply to all women, but it helps to provide a clearer picture of the reasons behind why a woman may decide to move from traditional norms.

The Consequences

We all know that cheating has consequences, and that even if one partner cheats, both parties will experience the reverberations of their affair. Men, women, both partners in the relationship, and even the perpetrator of the act: all could potentially be affected.

Let’s start off with the repercussions that the cheater could suffer. Now, take this with a grain of salt, as it has become a running joke that men who cheat tend to get away with it a bit easier than women do. The stereotype certainly exists for good reason, though we have to remember that there are exceptions to the rules!

Nevertheless, the consequences that men could suffer if they are caught cheating could be numerous, including:

A tarnished reputation. Whether it’s in the workplace, with family, or among friends, men who cheat run the risk of wrecking their reputation in an instant. It’s important to remember that many people are already quick to judge and point fingers toward those who have strayed from the faithful path.

They might lose their job. Of course, this depends on the level of the workplace’s code of conduct and the severity of the affair. But it certainly could be the case in some instances, including if it was with a work colleague or had adulterous consequences for the company.

Legal troubles. This one is especially important for those people who have already entered into a committed relationship as it can depend on the laws of the state. Some states have laws that define cheating as a crime punishable by law. Do make sure you’re aware of your state’s laws if you don’t want to be facing criminal charges.

Now, the consequences that can be faced by those who were the victim of cheating will also vary greatly depending on the circumstances. Some of the consequences that the victim might experience include:

A deep feeling of betrayal. This is one of the most common reactions to being cheated on. And while it’s understandable, it can provoke and fuel various other emotions, such as anger and sadness.

Difficulty trusting again. This ties into the first consequence. Those who have been cheated will ultimately struggle with the idea of trusting another person again, whether that be in a romantic or non-romantic context.

Devastating from a financial standpoint. If a couple has already tied the knot and owns property, it could be disastrous if the wronged party decides to pursue a divorce. In such a case, it could involve asset division, which could be financially detrimental for the person who was cheated on.

Cheating can often tear apart any trust that was once held among couples, leaving them vulnerable to further hurt if it doesn’t get addressed. It is imperative to be honest and open to each other to get through this trying time, and to make an effort to reconnect with one another. Are you ready to take that step?

The Do’s and Don’ts

Men and women may have their own very different reasons for why they cheat, but there are some things they should both stay far, far away from if they want to avoid getting caught…

Let’s start with the Do’s:

1. Do remember that communication is key. If you’re in a relationship, be sure to talk openly and honestly with your partner and make sure your feelings are understood. That way, if something inevitably goes wrong, you have the benefit of being able to communicate and address the issues instead of running off with someone else.

2. Do be aware of your own feelings and your partner’s feelings. Even if you don’t fully understand what’s being said all the time, it’s important to pay attention to how your partner expresses themselves, as well as your own feelings, and make sure that nothing important is slipping through without being noticed.

3. Do be mindful of how you’re treating each other. Relationships are a two-way street, and if one of you isn’t careful about how they act, then it’s more likely that one of you may feel taken for granted and look elsewhere for affection.

Now for the Don’ts:

1. Don’t use cheating as an act of revenge or punishment. This usually only leads to further heartache and pain.

2. Don’t make any excuses for yourself if you do cheat. Whether you’re a man or a woman, it’s never ok to use someone else as an emotional crutch when you’re not happy with your relationship.

3. Don’t believe everything you hear. People can be notoriously quick to jump to conclusions and make judgments about who cheats more women or men. Those judgments usually have a lot more to do with perception than reality, so never jump to any conclusions without seeking more facts.

At the end of the day, cheating can be a very serious issue, and men and women alike need to take responsibility for their own actions. If a relationship is in trouble, then communication and understanding are key to making it better – not affairs and secret liaisons. So make sure you take the time to think carefully before making any decisions and don’t allow anyone, even yourself, to be a victim of cheating stereotypes.

Who Claims To Be Cheaterer?

Who Claims To Be Cheaterer?

In the great debate about who cheats more men or women, one thing is for sure: Neither side will ever admit that it’s them. Men are convinced that women are the cheaters, while women are certain it must be the men! So who really claims to be the cheaterer?

Some might say men are the bigger cheaters, but let’s take a closer look. Men may be more up front about their cheating tendencies. They often brag about their conquests, the way they’ve duped women, and the frequency of their infidelity. It’s almost like they’re deliberately trying to paint themselves as cheaters!

But women know better than to let men off the hook so easily. They’ve long suspected that men are sneakier with their dalliances. After all, it’s so much easier to be discreet when you don’t have to worry about friends and family learning your secrets. Men may even convince themselves that their affairs are not technically cheating because they’re “keeping it on the down low.”

However, women admittedly engage in similar activities as well. Just think about how often you hear stories of a woman sneakily having an affair with her boss or a married man. But women have a knack for keeping their affairs under wraps. In fact, I often hear the phrase “cheaters never get caught” when it comes to women’s infidelity.

So who can really claim the title of the Cheater? Both men and women have plenty of evidence to make their case. I guess it all boils down to who’s better at hiding their misdeeds. Unfortunately, that’s a debate that doesn’t seem to have a clear cut winner.

The only thing that’s for sure is that cheating is wrong no matter who does it. After all, why would anyone want to get into a situation where they’re risking the trust and dignity of another person? As the old saying goes,

“If it’s wrong for you, it’s wrong for all.”

So, who cheats more men or women? Like so many things in life, it depends on who you ask. Some will swear it’s the men, while others will swear it’s the women. The truth is, we may never know who claims the title of Cheater. All we can do is hope that everyone can learn to put respect, trust, and honesty above all else.

Best Online Dating Sites & Apps That Actually Work

Best Online Dating Sites & Apps That Actually Work

When it comes to relationships, everyone has different preferences and desires. Some people are looking for long-term commitment, while others are more interested in casual connections. If you find yourself in the latter category, then hookup sites can be a great way to meet like-minded individuals online.

However, with so many options available on the web, it can be overwhelming to sift through all the different sites and apps to find one that works for you. That’s where our list of reputable dating sites comes in – we’ve done the research and identified some of the best hookup sites available.

Our list includes a range of options to cater to different preferences, such as couple-friendly options, hookup sites for gay men, and spots for missed connections. We’ve also highlighted sites that offer discreet hookups, safe options for women, and inclusive hookup sites for women.

Best Online Dating Sites That Actually Work

So, whether you’re looking for a one-night stand or a regular hookup buddy, there’s a site out there that’s perfect for you. Take a look at our list of the best hookup sites and apps and find the perfect one for you!

Adult Friend Finder – Our Favourite **

AdultFriendFinder Tips and Tricks

Adult Friend FinderAdult Friend Finder is a popular hookup site that has been around since 1996, and it remains one of the top options for people looking to explore casual connections. With millions of members worldwide, the site offers a vast pool of potential partners to choose from, and its user-friendly interface and easy-to-use features make it a great option for people of all experience levels.

One of the biggest benefits of Adult Friend Finder is the range of features it offers to help you connect with others. The site allows you to browse through profiles, send messages and flirts, join chat rooms and groups, and even watch live webcams of other members. This makes it easy to find people who are looking for the same type of connection as you, whether that’s a one-night stand or a regular hookup buddy.

Another great feature of Adult Friend Finder is its emphasis on user safety and privacy. The site allows you to control who can view your profile and personal information, and it also offers tips and resources to help you stay safe when meeting new people online.

Ashley Madison

Ashley Madison (Ashley Madison Tips for Successful First Messages) is a dating site that has been specifically designed for people looking to have discreet affairs or casual hookups outside of their relationships. The site has been in operation since 2001 and has since become one of the most popular and trusted sites for people seeking extra-marital connections.

One of the biggest benefits of Ashley Madison is its focus on privacy and discretion. The site allows you to create a profile without using your real name, and it also offers a range of privacy features to help you control who can view your profile and personal information. This makes it a great option for people who are looking to keep their extra-marital connections completely confidential.

Another benefit of Ashley Madison is the range of features it offers to help you connect with others. The site allows you to browse through profiles, send messages and gifts, and even join chat rooms to meet other members. This makes it easy to find like-minded individuals who are looking for the same type of connection as you.

Tinder

Using Tinder Gold

Tinder is one of the most popular dating apps available today, and it has become a go-to option for people looking to meet new people and explore romantic connections. One of the biggest benefits of Tinder is its user-friendly interface, which allows you to quickly and easily swipe through profiles and connect with other users who have also expressed interest in you.

Another great feature of Tinder is its focus on user safety and privacy. The app allows you to control who can see your profile and personal information, and it also offers features like photo verification to help ensure that you are connecting with real people.

One of the most unique features of Tinder is its algorithm, which uses your swiping history and profile information to show you potential matches who are most likely to be a good fit for you. This makes it easy to find people who are looking for the same type of connection as you, whether that’s a casual fling or a more serious relationship.

Bumble

How To Start A Conversation On Bumble

Bumble is a popular dating app that has gained a reputation for being a safe and empowering platform for women. Unlike some other dating apps, Bumble requires women to make the first move when connecting with potential matches, giving them greater control over the types of connections they make.

One of the biggest benefits of Bumble is its focus on user safety and privacy. The app allows you to control who can see your profile and personal information, and it also offers features like photo verification to help ensure that you are connecting with real people. Bumble also has a strict policy against hate speech, bullying, and harassment, making it a safe and welcoming space for users of all genders and backgrounds.

Another great feature of Bumble is its algorithm, which uses your swiping history and profile information to show you potential matches who are most likely to be a good fit for you. This makes it easy to find people who are looking for the same type of connection as you, whether that’s a casual fling or a more serious relationship.

Zoosk

Zoosk Tips and Tricks

Zoosk is a popular dating site that has become known for its unique approach to matchmaking. Unlike other dating sites that rely solely on questionnaires and profile information, Zoosk uses a patented Behavioral Matchmaking algorithm that learns from your actions on the site to show you potential matches who are most likely to be a good fit for you.

One of the biggest benefits of Zoosk is its user-friendly interface. The site is easy to navigate and offers a range of features to help you connect with other users, including messaging, photo verification, and a variety of search options. Zoosk also allows you to connect your social media accounts to your profile, making it easy to find and connect with people you already know.

Zoosk is a great option for anyone looking for a unique approach to online dating. With its Behavioral Matchmaking algorithm, user-friendly interface, and emphasis on user safety and privacy, it’s no wonder why it remains one of the most popular dating sites available today.

Grindr

Grindr is a dating app that has become popular among gay, bi, and trans men looking to connect with others in their community. One of the biggest benefits of Grindr is its focus on inclusivity and creating a safe space for users to explore their sexuality and connect with others who share their interests.

One of the key features of Grindr is its location-based matching, which allows you to see and connect with other users in your area. This makes it easy to find other gay men nearby and explore romantic connections with people who share your interests and values.

Feeld

Feeld is a dating app that has become popular among couples and individuals looking to explore non-traditional relationships and connect with others who share their interests. One of the biggest benefits of Feeld is its focus on inclusivity and creating a safe space for users to explore their sexuality and connect with others who share their interests.

One of the key features of Feeld is its emphasis on non-traditional relationships, which allows you to connect with other individuals and couples looking for threesomes, open relationships, and more. This makes it easy to find like-minded individuals who share your interests and values.

Feeld is a great option for anyone looking to explore non-traditional relationships and connect with others who share their interests.

Silver Singles

SilverSingles is a dating site that has become popular among seniors looking to connect with others in their age group and explore romantic connections. One of the biggest benefits of SilverSingles is its focus on creating a safe space for older adults to connect and explore romantic connections with others who share their interests and values.

One of the key features of SilverSingles is its emphasis on creating a community of like-minded individuals, which allows you to connect with other seniors looking for meaningful connections and long-term relationships. This makes it easy to find other seniors nearby and explore romantic connections with people who share your interests and values.

The site also offers a range of features to help you find and connect with potential matches, including detailed profiles, photo verification, messaging, and a variety of search options.

SilverSingles is a great option for anyone looking to explore romantic connections with other seniors.

HER

HER is a dating app that has become popular among women looking to connect with others in the LGBTQ+ community and explore romantic connections. One of the biggest benefits of HER is its focus on inclusivity and creating a safe space for women to connect and explore romantic connections with others who share their interests and values.

One of the key features of HER is its emphasis on creating a community of like-minded individuals, which allows you to connect with other women looking for meaningful connections and long-term relationships. This makes it easy to find other women nearby and explore romantic connections with people who share your interests and values.

Another great feature of HER is its user-friendly interface, which makes it easy to navigate and connect with other users. The app also offers a range of features to help you find and connect with potential matches, including detailed profiles, photo verification, messaging, and a variety of search options.

HER is a great option for anyone looking to explore romantic connections with other women in the LGBTQ+ community. 

Match.com

Match.com is one of the oldest and most well-established dating sites in the world, and it’s still one of the most popular options for people looking to connect with others and explore romantic connections. One of the biggest benefits of Match.com is its huge user base, which means that you have a much greater chance of finding someone who shares your interests and values.

Another great feature of Match.com is its focus on creating a community of like-minded individuals, which allows you to connect with people who are looking for meaningful connections and long-term relationships. This makes it easy to find other singles nearby and explore romantic connections with people who share your interests and values.

Match.com also offers a range of features to help you find and connect with potential matches, including detailed profiles, photo verification, messaging, and a variety of search options. The site also has a comprehensive matching algorithm that takes into account your preferences and interests to help you find the most compatible matches.

Match.com is a great option for anyone looking to explore romantic connections with other singles.

eHarmony

eHarmony is a popular dating site that is known for its unique compatibility matching system, which has helped millions of people find meaningful relationships. One of the biggest benefits of eHarmony is its focus on creating long-term, meaningful connections between compatible partners.

The site has a detailed personality assessment that is designed to help you find matches based on your interests, values, and personality traits. This makes it easy to find other singles who share your interests and values, and who are looking for a long-term, committed relationship.

eHarmony is a great option for anyone looking to explore romantic connections with other singles. 

Christian Mingle

Christian Mingle is a popular dating site for Christians who are looking to connect with other like-minded individuals and explore romantic connections. One of the biggest benefits of Christian Mingle is its focus on creating a community of Christians who share common values and beliefs.

The site has a comprehensive matching algorithm that takes into account your preferences and interests to help you find the most compatible matches. This makes it easy to find other singles who share your values and beliefs, and who are looking for a long-term, committed relationship.

Christian Mingle is a great option for Christians who are looking to explore romantic connections with other like-minded individuals. With a focus on creating a community of Christians who share common values and beliefs.

PURE

Pure is a popular dating site that focuses on casual hookups and short-term relationships. It has gained popularity due to its unique approach of helping users find quick and easy connections with others looking for the same thing.

One of the best things about Pure is its straightforward approach to online dating. It’s designed to be fast, easy, and convenient, with a simple and intuitive interface that makes it easy to connect with others looking for the same type of connection as you. The site is also focused on privacy, ensuring that all interactions are kept completely confidential and anonymous.

Happn

Happn is a unique dating site that is designed to help you connect with people you have crossed paths with in real life. It uses geolocation technology to match you with other users who have been in your vicinity at the same time, making it easier to meet someone with whom you share a mutual connection.

One of the biggest benefits of Happn is its focus on real-life connections. By using the app, you can discover people who you have crossed paths with in your daily life, but may not have had the chance to meet or connect with. This creates an organic and authentic connection that can lead to a more meaningful relationship.

Happn is a great option for anyone who is looking to meet someone in real life and connect with people they may have missed out on.

Are Hookup Sites and Apps Safe?

Not all adult-dating sites and apps are safe. That’s why we had to dig deeper into the web for the safest and most reliable casual-dating sites, for you. That said, our top picks come with solid security features to protect your financial and personal info against any third parties lurking across the web.

Which Is Better: Free Hookup Sites or Paid Hookup Sites?

Paid casual-dating sites are way better than free options. These come with a bunch of key features, such as video chat, geolocation, and enhanced security, functions you’re unlikely to enjoy with free options. That’s not to say you can’t find casual connections using free versions, but the experience is more seamless with paid versions.

Is It Easy to Find a Partner at the Best Hookup Sites?

A resounding yes it is, especially if you know the ropes around the game. This includes spicing up your opening lines, uploading attractive photos, etc. Still, your best bet might be the best dating sites with an above-average success rate, like AdultFriendFinder. 

Is Everyone on Hookup Apps Looking for a Short-Term Fling?

Not really. You could run into folks that are seeking a long-term relationship, even on dating apps that are exclusive to hookups. That said, you might want to lay bare your intentions beforehand so your matches know exactly what you’re after.

Should I Be Upfront About My Preferences in a Partner?

It’s no big deal for hookups, considering casual connections are what they really are: short-term things. Meanwhile, when it comes to serious relationships, you should be upfront about your preferences in a partner. You don’t want to end up with a life partner that has habits (or “looks”) you dislike.

What Hookup Sites Actually Work?

All of our hookup online sites work. Still, a place like AdultFriendFinder (or even Ashley Madison) might be a good place to start, especially because it ticks most of the right boxes as far as a reputable hookup site goes.

What Is the Best Hookup Website for Seniors?

SilverSingles, without a doubt. The vast majority of members are aged 50+, and the site has an easy-to-use interface, so users find their way around hassle-free. Among other things, matches are local and compatible, and the gender ratio is reliable.

Why Should You Trust Our Hookup Site Reviews?

We’re different – our determination to bring you the best of the best online hookup sites speaks for itself. Yeah, we considered most of the things you like as far as hooking up online goes.

To begin with, we went for options with a decent gender split, save for the LGBTQ+ dating sites, just so there’s someone for everyone. Most of our top picks have a high member activity, too. In other words, conversations are flowing hassle-free. When it comes to the user base, we narrowed our options to dating and hookup sites with an above-average hunting ground. Of course, this only helps boost the chances of landing yourself a match.

And, because we wanted you to gauge if a dating site is a good fit for you before dishing out $$$, we included casual dating platforms with a free version. There’s even one with a free trial. 

So, feel free to test the waters accordingly before taking the plunge! For those who fancy face-to-face communication, we have a couple of hookup websites with video chats. It’s time you cut off the fakes from your list of matches, right?

Because we’ve been in this game long enough to understand that not everyone might have the time to sit glued to their PC most of the time, we included entries with a dating app, too.

Best Sites for Hookups – The Takeaway

With all these cool options, you should stop searching for the best hookup dating sites online and get registered on some of our top picks! Your best bet might be AdultFriendFinder. This hookup site is not only exclusive to hookups but also boasts an unmatched success rate, among other cool features and perks. 

You may want to explore Ashley Madison, too, especially if you’re wanting to connect discreetly. If you’re looking for a way to meet people for casual dating, hookup apps might be a great option for you! These are similar to hookup sites, but you can access them on your tablet or smartphone. Plus, many of these apps have fully functional web versions for desktop users.

Now, when it comes to safety, not all dating apps and sites are created equal. That’s why we’ve gone the extra mile to find the safest and most reliable options out there, so you can enjoy your casual connections with peace of mind. While there are free hookup sites available, we recommend paid options for the best experience. These often come with features like video chat, geolocation, and enhanced security that you won’t find with free options.

But don’t worry, finding a partner at the best hookup sites is definitely possible! Just remember to spice up your opening lines, upload attractive photos, and be upfront about your intentions. And if you’re a senior online dater, SilverSingles is a great option for you. With a majority of members aged 50+, an easy-to-use interface, and compatible matches, it’s definitely worth checking out.

We hope you found our reviews helpful in your search for the best hookup sites. Our goal is to provide you with the most reliable and trustworthy information out there. So, go ahead and give some of our top picks a try – good luck!

 

When A Girl Says She Needs Space

When A Girl Says She Needs Space

When a girl says she needs space, it can be a confusing and potentially distressing time for her partner. But it’s important to understand that needing space in a relationship is a normal and healthy part of any relationship. It allows both partners to focus on their own needs and goals, and to come back to the relationship with a renewed sense of connection and appreciation.

When A Girl Says She Needs Space, What Does That Mean

There are many different reasons why a person might need space in a relationship. Here are a few common ones:

  1. Personal growth and development: Sometimes, people need space in a relationship in order to focus on their own goals, hobbies, or personal growth. Taking time for oneself can be especially important during times of change or transition, such as starting a new job or moving to a new city.
  2. Overwhelm or stress: Life can be hectic and overwhelming at times, and it’s important to have some space and time to relax and recharge. If a partner is feeling overwhelmed or stressed, they may need some space to take care of themselves and decompress.
  3. Need for independence: It’s natural for people to want some independence and autonomy in a relationship. If a partner feels like they are losing their sense of self or becoming too reliant on the other person, they may need some space to reconnect with their own interests and desires.
  4. Distance in a long-distance relationship: Physical distance can be challenging for any relationship, and it’s normal to need space and time to adjust. If a partner is in a long-distance relationship, they may need some extra time and space to maintain their own routine and independence.
  5. Communication issues or conflicts: If a relationship is experiencing communication breakdown or conflicts, it can be helpful for both partners to take some space to cool down and reflect on the situation. This can help them approach the issue with a clearer head and communicate more effectively when they’re ready to talk.
  6. Feeling suffocated or controlled: Relationships should be based on mutual respect and trust, and it’s important for both partners to have some space and independence. If one partner feels like the other is being too controlling or suffocating, they may need some space to feel more autonomous and secure in the relationship.

So, if your partner says they need space, it’s important to listen and try to understand their perspective. Avoid getting defensive or trying to persuade them to stay; instead, focus on understanding where they’re coming from and what they need. It’s also important to respect their boundaries and give them the space they need. This might mean spending less time together or giving each other more alone time.

It’s important to have open and honest communication about your needs and feelings as well. If your partner says they need space, it can be helpful to discuss the reasons why and see if there are any underlying issues that need to be addressed. This might involve addressing any communication issues or conflicts, setting boundaries, or finding ways to support each other’s goals and interests.

If you’re having trouble navigating your partner’s need for space, it can be helpful to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist. They can provide a neutral perspective and help you work through any challenges you might be facing.

There are also several things you can do to give and respect space in a relationship:

There are also several things you can do to give and respect space in a relationship

  1. Set clear boundaries and communicate openly: It’s important to set clear boundaries in any relationship and to communicate openly about your needs and desires. This can help prevent misunderstandings and ensure that both partners feel respected and valued.
  2. Engage in self-care and prioritize personal time: Taking care of yourself is crucial for maintaining a healthy relationship. Make time for your own hobbies, interests, and self-care practices, and encourage your partner to do the same. This can help both partners feel more balanced and fulfilled, and can ultimately strengthen the relationship.
  3. Foster independence and support each other’s goals and interests: Relationships should be based on mutual respect and support. Encourage your partner to pursue their own goals and interests, and make sure to support them in their endeavors. At the same time, make sure to maintain your own independence and autonomy. This can help create a more dynamic and fulfilling relationship for both partners.
  4. Practice empathy and listen to each other’s needs: Empathy is an important part of any healthy relationship. Make an effort to listen to your partner’s needs and feelings, and try to see things from their perspective. This can help create a stronger, more understanding and supportive relationship.

In conclusion, needing space in a relationship is a normal and healthy part of any relationship. It allows both partners to focus on their own needs and goals, and to come back to the relationship with a renewed sense of connection and appreciation. It’s important to communicate openly, respect each other’s boundaries, and work together to find a balance that works for both partners. By fostering independence, engaging in self-care, and practicing empathy, you can create a strong and healthy relationship that allows for both space and closeness.

Dating A Married Man

Dating A Married Man

Dating a married man can have serious consequences. Not only are you risking your own heart and soul, but you could be putting the entire family in jeopardy. A recent study found that nearly half of all marriages that began as affairs ended in divorce. So why do so many people still date married men?

There are a number of reasons why dating a married man is still popular. For one, it can be exciting to have an illicit affair. The secrecy and danger involved can be a huge turn-on for some people. Additionally, many women feel flattered and special when a married man pays attention to them. They may rationalize his actions by telling themselves that he must be unhappy in his marriage and that he is only seeking companionship outside of it.

However, the reality is that dating a married man is fraught with dangers and risks. Not only are you putting your own heart at risk, but you could also be risking the hearts of his wife and children. If his affair is discovered, it could wreck their lives as well. Additionally, you may find yourself in the middle of a messy divorce if things don’t work out.

So why take the risk? If you’re considering dating a married man, ask yourself why. Is it worth the risk to your own heart and soul? Is it worth risking the lives of his family? If you can’t answer these questions with a resounding “yes,” then you should rethink your decision. After all, there are plenty of single men out there who would be happy to date you. Why settle for someone who is already taken?

Understand The Risks Of Dating A Married Man

When you decide to date a married man, you are taking on a lot of risk. While there may be some excitement in sneaking around and hiding your relationship, it can also be very stressful. If the man is unhappy in his marriage, he may be looking for a way out, and that could mean using you as his escape route. If his wife finds out about the affair, she may confront you and try to hurt you. The man may also lie to you about being divorced or separated when he is actually still married. This can lead to a lot of heartache and pain down the road.

You also need to be prepared for the fact that the man may not leave his wife for you. Even if he says that he loves you and wants to be with you, he may not actually follow through on those promises. If you are not prepared to deal with the possibility that he may not leave his wife, then you should not get involved with a married man.

There are many risks involved in dating a married man, so it is important to weigh those risks against the potential rewards. If you are not prepared to handle the risks, then you should not get involved in this type of relationship.

Consider Your Reasons For Wanting To Date A Married Man

Consider Your Reasons For Wanting To Date A Married Man

When you date a married man, you are putting yourself in a risky situation. There are many potential dangers that can come from such a relationship, including emotional heartbreak, possible legal consequences, and even physical danger.

Before you decide to pursue a relationship with a married man, it is important to consider why you want to do so. Are you looking for something exciting and new? Are you trying to fill a void in your own life? Or are you simply attracted to the man himself?

Understand That You Will Be Putting Yourself At Risk Emotionally.

Dating a married man can be a very emotionally draining experience. You may find yourself constantly wondering if he is really with you, or if he is with his wife. You may also find yourself feeling jealous of the time he spends with her, and the relationship they have.

There is also a very real possibility that the man will eventually leave you for his wife. This can be an extremely painful experience, and one that can take a long time to recover from.

Consider The Legal Risks Involved With Seeing A Married Man.

In some states, it is actually considered a crime to date a married man. If you are caught, you could face serious legal repercussions, including jail time.

Even if you are not breaking any laws, your relationship with a married man could still have legal consequences. For example, if he decides to file for divorce, you could be named as a co-respondent. This could mean that you would have to testify against him in court, and it could damage your reputation.

Think About The Physical Risks Involved With Being With A Married Man.

If the man you are dating is abusive, there is a very real possibility that you could be in physical danger. If he is physically abusive to his wife, there is a good chance that he will be physically abusive to you as well.

Even if the man you are dating is not abusive, there is still a risk of becoming involved in a physical altercation with his wife. If she finds out about the affair, she may confront you, and the situation could quickly become violent.

In conclusion, there are many risks involved in dating a married man. These risks can be emotional, legal, and even physical. Before you decide to pursue such a relationship, it is important to weigh the pros and cons carefully.

Be Discreet – Don’t Tell Anyone About Your Relationship With A Married Man

If you are having an affair with a married man, it is important to be discreet. Don’t tell anyone about your relationship, as it could lead to complications and heartache. Ultimately, it is up to you whether or not to tell anyone, but just be aware of the potential consequences.

Don’t get too attached to a married man

There are a few things to keep in mind if you’re thinking about getting involved with a married man. First, remember that his first priority is always going to be his wife and family. So don’t expect him to be fully invested in your relationship. Secondly, there’s a good chance that his marriage is on the rocks and he’s looking for a way out. But even if his marriage is solid, he’s still cheating on his wife. And that’s not something you want to be a part of. Finally, remember that you’re not the only one he’s seeing. He’s probably got a few other women on the side. So don’t get too attached to him. You’re better off finding a single guy who’s available and interested in you.

Know When To End The Relationship With A Married Man

Know When To End The Relationship With A Married Man

There are times when it is best to end a relationship with a married man. If you are not happy, if you are being lied to, or if you suspect that he is still seeing his wife, then it is time to move on. Ending a relationship with a married man can be difficult, but it is often the best thing for everyone involved.

If you are thinking about ending your relationship with a married man, here are some things to consider:

  • If you are not happy in the relationship, then it is time to end it. Unhappiness is not worth staying in a relationship for.
  • If you suspect that your man is lying to you about his relationship with his wife, it is time to end things. Lying is not a foundation for a healthy relationship.
  • If you have any reason to believe that your man is still seeing his wife, it is time to end the relationship. A man who is still seeing his wife is not available to you emotionally or physically.
  • If your man is not willing to leave his wife for you, then it is time to end the relationship. A man who is not willing to divorce his wife is not ready to commit to you.
  • If you have children with your man, ending the relationship will likely mean that you will become a single parent. If you are not prepared to take on this responsibility, it is best to end the relationship now.
  • Ending a relationship with a married man can have serious consequences. If you are not prepared to deal with the potential fallout, it is best to end things now.
  • If you are not sure that you can handle the guilt of breaking up a family, it is best to end the relationship now. Guilt can be a heavy burden to carry.
  • If you are not prepared for a long-term relationship with a man who is already married, it is best to end things now. A relationship with a married man is not likely to last.
  • If you do not want to be responsible for breaking up a family, it is best to end the relationship now. Being a homewrecker is not something most people aspire to.

At the end of the day, you have to ask yourself if he is really worth all of the hassle. If the answer is no, then it is time to end the relationship.

Move On With Your Life After Being With A With A Married Man

Move On With Your Life After Being With A With A Married Man

Being with a married man is never a good idea. It can be so hard to move on after being with someone who is already taken, but you have to try. You deserve to be happy and in a healthy relationship with someone who loves and respects you. There are plenty of other people out there who would make great partners, so don’t waste your time on someone who is already taken. Here are a few tips to help you move on after being with a married man:

  • Don’t dwell on what could have been or what might have been. It’s important to focus on the present and the future, not the past. Letting go of the past will help you move on and start fresh.
  • It’s best to cut ties with a married man completely. That means no texts, no calls, and no communication of any kind. Keeping in touch will only make it harder for you to move on.
  • Talk to your friends and family about what you’re going through. They can offer words of wisdom and support. Sometimes it helps to talk to someone who has gone through a similar experience.
  • If you’re struggling to move on, consider seeking professional help. A therapist can help you work through your emotions and start to heal.
  • Now is the time to focus on you. Do things that make you happy and make you feel good about yourself. Work on improving your self-esteem and becoming the best version of yourself.

Moving on after being with a married man can be difficult, but it’s not impossible. With time and effort, you will be able to move on and find happiness elsewhere.

Dating A Married Man

Dating a married man can be very challenging and heartbreaking. If you find yourself in this situation, it is important to remember that you are not alone. There are other women out there who have been in your shoes and have found a way to move on with their lives. You can too. Start by reaching out for support from friends or family members. If you need more support, consider seeking out counseling or therapy. These professionals can help you work through your emotions and develop a plan for moving on.

It is also important to take care of yourself during this time. Make sure to eat healthy foods, exercise, and get plenty of rest. Taking care of yourself will help you feel stronger and more capable of dealing with the challenges you are facing.

Finally, remember that it is okay to be sad or angry about your situation. These emotions are normal and expected. Allow yourself to feel them, but don’t let them take over your life. With time, you will be able to move on from this difficult experience and build a happy and healthy life for yourself.

Best Ashley Madison Greeting

Best Ashley Madison Greeting

When it comes to meeting women online, a great opening line makes all the difference. On a site like Ashley Madison and other cheating apps / sites, kickstarting the conversation with the right material is even more important.

Best Ashley Madison Greeting

Best Ashley Madison Greeting

Unlike other dating websites, Ashley Madison (Maximize Your Matches: Ashley Madison Tips and Tricks) operates on a credit system. If guys want to start talking to a woman, they’ll need to cough up credits to get the conversation started. This virtual currency isn’t free. In fact, even the cheapest credit plan is pretty expensive. If you open the conversation with a lackluster line, there’s little chance of you getting a response. In other words, you’re throwing good money away.

To increase your chances of warranting a reply, you’ll need to work on your opening gambit. You’ll give your dating prospects an instant boost while saving yourself a small fortune in the long run.

Start By Crafting a First-Rate Profile

Start By Crafting a First-Rate Profile

Kicking the conversation off with a killer opening line is only going to get you so far. If you want to increase the odds of keeping a woman on the hook, you’ll need a captivating profile. Putting together a winning profile on Ashley Madison isn’t difficult. In fact, you can use the same approach you’ve used elsewhere.

However, there are some specific things you’ll need to consider when creating an Ashley Madison bio. For starters, remember where you are. Ashley Madison is a platform designed for married men looking to pursue affairs. Don’t play innocent in your bio. There’s no need to. Women using this platform know the kind of guys they’ll be talking to. You’re not going to earn yourself any points by being coy about your intentions.

That being said, don’t go overboard when filling out your profile. Women using Ashley Madison might not have any reservations about connecting with married guys, but they don’t want to feel too objectified. You’re dealing with open-minded women who are up for no-strings sex, not prostitutes. Once you get a conversation off the ground, you can eventually steer the dialogue toward bedroom details and sexual preferences.

Finally, think carefully before uploading your profile photo. A good photo needs a first-class hero shot, so pick a snap that showcases you well. However, you don’t want to create any false impressions. By all means pick a photo that presents you in a good light, but make sure it’s reflective of what you actually look like in the flesh.

How to Get a Conversation Started

Struggling to get the attention of women on Ashley Madison? Your opening statement probably needs work. Looking for some inspiration? We’ve put together some suggestions that will make starting a conversation easier than ever before.

When Words Fail You

When Words Fail You

Not everyone has a way with words. If you’ve spotted a profile that catches your eye and are itching to start talking with a woman on Ashley Madison, think about using images to get the ball rolling instead. You can use a quirky image as an icebreaker. Alternatively, a funny GIF can raise a smile and start a dialogue, without you having to delve into your vocabulary. However, you should follow some general tips to increase the odds of securing a reply. Avoid sending anything too sexual, even if a woman’s profile demonstrates she’s up for anything.

Lead With a Question

Lead With a Question

Commencing the conversation with a question is always a great idea. For starters, it saves you from having to come up with something slick to introduce yourself with. What’s more, it’ll make you come across as more engaged and open to hearing what she has to say. We’re not suggesting you lead by asking what her favorite color is, however. Instead, keep it specific. Trawl her profile to find interest points you can use for question inspiration. Does she mention movies and television shows she’s interested in? Ask her what she thought of a recent cinema release or episode.

Use Their Profile for Inspiration

Use Their Profile for Inspiration

As well as giving you ideas of questions, a woman’s Ashley Madison profile is a treasure trove of insights into the kind of person she is. Most women will expect you to read their bio before messaging them, but photo galleries can also provide you with plenty of material. Look at what she’s wearing, where she’s posing, and what she’s doing. If you recognize any local haunts or landmarks, make a point of this in your first message. Is her pad furnished with iconic posters or prints? Let them know you share a love of a particular artist and you’ll up your chances of securing a hookup.

There’s Always Room for Humour

There's Always Room for Humour

Cracking a joke is an easy way of breaking the ice. However, you can sink or swim when using humor to initiate contact with a woman. Cheesy pickup lines should never be deployed with a straight face. If you’re going to fall back on them, make sure she knows you’re doing so ironically. If you want to go broad, delve into the tried and tested classics. A knock-knock joke can work wonders, provided it’s not playground-level. If you have a novelty joke book gathering dust on a shelf, think about fishing it out and flicking through the pages for ideas. Just remember to avoid sending anything too NSFW.

Ask for Recommendations if They’re Local

Ask for Recommendations if They're Local

If you’re scouting for nearby women, you can use your shared location as a launching pad for conversations. Ask for bar recommendations or enquire as to whether there are any new decent clubs in the vicinity. If a woman says she’s a foodie in her profile, ask about restaurant recommendations or recipe suggestions. You’ve broken the ice but have also demonstrated you’ve noted her interests. Easy conversation is bound to follow.

Keep it Simple and Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff

Keep it Simple and Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

For men, making the first move on Ashley Madison is daunting. Furthermore, the fact male users are spending a small premium on every message they send makes it even more frustrating when a reply isn’t forthcoming.

When messaging women on this platform, don’t overthink it and keep things casual. You’re never going to enjoy a 100-percent success rate when messaging women. Even the ones who do message you back aren’t guaranteed to keep talking to you after a few exchanges. If you’re brand new to the system, experiment with different greetings. Getting a better hit rate with GIFs? Use these to ignite conversations in the future. Are you finding that jokes are better at breaking the ice? Lean into humor when making the first move.

Ashley Madison Reviews

Ashley Madison Reviews

In the world of online dating, Ashley Madison is a heavyweight. This adult-only platform has been around for more than 20 years and remains one of the most popular dating sites on the web. As of 2022, Ashley Madison has more than 70 million users, with more than 4.7 million users joining the service in 2021 alone.

Ashley Madison Reviews

Ashley Madison might remain a popular option for married users looking to play the field (Keep Your Account Secure: Ashley Madison Safety Tips and Tricks), but the platform hasn’t been without controversy. In 2015, it became embroiled in an embarrassing data leak scandal. It’s also been accused of playing host to thousands of bots and fake profiles.

Nonetheless, the user growth statistics speak for themselves. It’s easy to use, offers a huge pool of users and, unlike many dating platforms, doesn’t skimp on privacy features. Need more convincing that Ashley Madison is right for you? We explore what users are saying about this enduringly popular hookup platform.

How User-Friendly is Ashley Madison?

How User-Friendly is Ashley Madison

In an era where dating apps reign supreme, online-only platforms have to struggle to keep on top. Thankfully, Ashley Madison pulls no punches when it comes to ease of use. The current desktop version of the platform is streamlined and user-friendly. What’s more, it offers a dedicated app for Android and iOS users, making it a solid competitor to the likes of Tinder.

It’s also easy to get started with Ashley Madison. Creating an account and setting up a profile is quick and simple. Users also don’t have to worry about handing over any payment details from the off. You’ll need to provide a few personal details to get the ball rolling, but nothing that will give your identity away. What’s more, you can get to work on your profile immediately.

Once you’ve done that, you can start browsing the profiles of nearby users. If you’re a man, you won’t be able to start messaging women until you’ve purchased some credits, but you can certainly save profiles that interest you for later.

What Do Users Have to Say About Pricing?

What Do Users Have to Say About Pricing

Although the user-friendly nature of Ashley Madison makes it a hit with many users, the gender-biased pricing structure is a big point of contention. It’s not uncommon for adult dating sites to allow women to use the service for free, but it’s becoming an increasingly outdated concept. It’s almost a hangover from the days of sugar daddy websites, where women were free to browse profiles of men loaded with cash and looking to spend on sex.

The good news is that users don’t have to lock themselves into pricey subscriptions. Rather than pay for rolling contracts to access Ashley Madison features, male users can purchase credits that can be used to send virtual gifts or start conversations. The downside? It’s not particularly cheap. A Basic credit bundle is the cheapest option, setting users back $49. This might seem fairly affordable, but you’ll get 100 credits. When you consider that it costs 5 credits to send a single message, it’s not particularly great value.

This is why most men using Ashley Madison opt for a Classic credits bundle. It’s more expensive at $149, but users get 500 credits they can use to start conversations and access other features. However, the overall pricing structure at Ashley Madison is one of the biggest downsides of the service. Many users aren’t happy with having to constantly top up their credit allowances to continue the conversation. There are some handy add-on services, including the Member Initiated Contact (MIC) feature that allows men to make their money go further. However, this is really a stealth subscription.

Some users have also complained about being billed multiple times for a single credit purchase. Although Ashley Madison will appear on any credit or debit statement anonymously, multiple transactions are going to be harder to explain to a suspicious spouse or girlfriend.

What About Fake Profiles?

What About Fake Profiles

Fake profiles and chatbots are a major issue in the world of online dating. Pretty every major platform and dating app has suffered with them at some point in time. Ashley Madison used to have a major issue with fake profiles. Back in 2015, a data leak suggested that as few as three in every 10,000 profiles were actual women. Since then, Ashley Madison has implemented some robust measures to spot fake profiles and bots.

Nowadays, male users are unlikely to find themselves wasting time on a fake profile. However, the risk is always there. What’s more, if you’re throwing good money at credits to send messages, you don’t want to find out you’ve been putting the moves on an AI.

How Good Are the Privacy Features?

How Good Are the Privacy Features

Privacy features and anonymity are some of Ashley Madison’s strongest points. It’s also the area that draws the most positive reviews from users. As this platform is geared toward married men looking to cheat on their spouses, privacy is everything. Although data leaks have caused trouble in the past, Ashley Madison now commits to not selling user information to third parties. Furthermore, if you decide to delete your account, your information will be destroyed forever.

When creating an account, the only contact information you’ll need to provide is an email address. You can use a phone number if you’re interested in two-factor authentication, but this isn’t a requirement. You’ll also need to provide some personal information to create a profile, but a photo isn’t essential. However, if you want to connect with other users, you’ll want a flattering photo front and center. Thankfully, Ashley Madison provides anonymity tools to make your profile photo as discreet as possible.

Is Ashley Madison Worth Your Time?

Is Ashley Madison Worth Your Time

Ashley Madison might comfortably rank in the top 10 dating sites, but user feedback is a mixed bag. Many men don’t like the idea of paying over the odds for basic functionality like sending messages, especially when women don’t have to pay a dime to use the service.

While the MIC feature does make it easier to keep the conversation flowing, men will still have to pay for a monthly subscription. The MIC scheme is marketed as a cost-saving feature, but it’s essentially a stealthy way of Ashley Madison introducing a conventional subscription.

If you have the money to play with, it’s still worth your time. Ashley Madison has some great features that make it easy to find eager women looking to engage with married men. Furthermore, there’s a huge pool of users waiting to connect. There’s also a full-featured app you can turn to for browsing on the go.

If you’re looking to browse for hookups without paying a cent, Ashley Madison isn’t a great fit. However, you can still try the service for free, provided you’re not itching to unlock the full suite of advanced features.

Alternative Sites to Ashley Madison

Alternative Sites to Ashley Madison

If you’re looking to kickstart an affair, there are few better hookup platforms than Ashley Madison. It’s one of the most established dating platforms on the internet, with millions of users worldwide. However, Ashley Madison isn’t without its drawbacks (Dating Expert Reveals Top Ashley Madison Tricks). Data leak scandals have tarnished its reputation in recent years. Meanwhile, many detractors argue that there is a high incidence of bots and fake profiles on the site.

Alternative Sites to Ashley Madison

More importantly, it’s not free for everyone. While women can use Ashley Madison free of charge, male users have to shell out for credits just to send messages and engage with fellow users. Admittedly, there are a few pricing tiers, making it reasonably affordable for casual users. However, anyone looking to increase their odds of landing a connection is going to have to fork out a small fortune for the privilege. Thankfully, there are many great alternatives out there to explore. Looking to connect with sexy singles for no-strings fun? Below are some of the best hookup sites currently available.

1. Heated Affairs

Heated Affairs

Heated Affairs is the place to go if you’re looking for extramarital fun. It’s an ideal alternative to Ashley Madison if you’re looking to make a saving, but don’t want to make too many sacrifices when it comes to functionality and discretion.

There is a pretty large user base on offer here. As of 2022, Heated Affairs boasts more than 48 million active users. Like Ashley Madison, you’ll have to pay to use Heated Affairs. This platform uses a similar credit system, but it’s far more affordable. Currently, you can pick up 200 credits for $3. However, just about every feature requires you to part with some credits, so don’t expect to use this service without paying.

Aside from a large pool of profiles and user-friendly instant messaging, you can also enjoy live webcam streams. What’s more, there are many active user groups to join here, making it easy to find an affair partner who shares your sexual interests and kinks.

There are some downsides here. If you’re looking for a completely free alternative to Ashley Madison, having to cough up for credits is going to be a point of contention. Furthermore, there are some fake profiles in the mix here and the site operator isn’t particularly proactive when it comes to deleting them.

2. NoStringsAttached

NoStringsAttached

If you’re prepared to pay for a dating service, NoStringsAttached is something to consider. Unlike Ashley Madison, NoStringsAttached operates on a monthly subscription basis. As of 2022, a basic monthly subscription will set you back $29.95. This might seem like a lot, but you’ll enjoy full access to all available features, with no hidden costs looking for further functionality behind a paywall.

Around 3 million people use this platform every month. NoStringsAttached might not boast the biggest user base, but it does play host to one of the most enthusiastic user pools. One of the real standouts of this service is its privacy features. If you’re worried about your spouse finding out about what you’re up to, you can be reassured that NoStringsAttached isn’t going to leave a trail of digital breadcrumbs.

When you’ve found someone who piques your interest, you can message them directly over the platform. You can also take things further with live webcam chat. Free membership is available, although you’ll be severely limited when it comes to the features you can use. Another downside is that NoStringsAttached doesn’t offer a dedicated app. That being said, the main site itself is mobile-friendly, meaning you won’t be too limited when making connections on the go.

3. Zoosk

Zoosk

Zoosk is a fairly conventional dating service, but it caters to just about everyone, including users looking for affairs. It started life as a Facebook app but has since blossomed and evolved into its own entity. It’s one of the best online platforms for personalized dating. As of 2022, there are more than 40 million users, meaning you’ll have no trouble finding someone to connect with, no matter what your kinks or sexual preference.

Search filters make it easy to find your perfect match, although you can also make use of the innovative matchmaking feature. There’s also a randomized carousel function, which operates in much the same way as Tinder’s swiping system.

You can start using Zoosk straight away thanks to a free trial. Once you’ve completed your trial period, you’ll have to start paying to use the full suite of features. The good news is that Zoosk is one of the more affordable dating platforms on the web. Currently, a monthly membership will cost you a very reasonable $10.00 if you sign up for a 12 month plan.

4. Adult FriendFinder

Adult FriendFinder

Adult FriendFinder is a fairly expensive option, but if you’re looking for no-strings sex and hookup partners with no inhibitions, you’ll have no trouble justifying the cost. This established platform is geared toward swingers and those who have few reservations when it comes to sex. Whether you’re a single guy looking to connect with sexy women or an open-minded type eager to explore the thrill of threesomes, you’ll find what you’re after here.

You can start using this service for free. It costs nothing to create a profile and browse the user base. However, to unlock full profile details and start engaging with other users, you’ll need to start paying for a subscription. Currently, Adult FriendFinder costs $39.95 per month. This is fairly pricey, but you’ll almost certainly end up paying at least twice this amount at Ashley Madison if you’re a particularly active user.

Adult FriendFinder also offers one of the best cam chat features around. If you’re looking to test the waters virtually before jumping into bed with strangers, this is a great way to break the ice. If you’re happy to spend a small premium on a first-rate service, you could do a lot worse than Adult FriendFinder.

5. BeNaughty

BeNaughty

Looking for a free alternative to Ashley Madison? Give BeNaughty a try. However, as with Ashley Madison, men and women are treated differently when it comes to access. Female users with a free plan can access pretty much every basic feature, although male users will be limited to a handful of free messages per day. If you’re not worried about rushing to find an affair partner, this might still work out nicely for you.

This site works in much the same way as Tinder. You can create a profile and, based on your search parameters, you simply swipe left or right as you sift through member profiles. Although fairly simple, this service does offer robust privacy features. If you’re worried about discretion, it’s easy to keep your videos and photos locked out from public view.

Start Exploring Ashley Madison Alternatives Today

As you can see, there is no shortage of Ashley Madison alternatives out there. Looking for no-strings sex with like-minded singles and adventurous couples? Make Adult FriendFinder your first port of call. Interested in everything from casual dating to finding someone who shares your sexual kinks? Zoosk caters to just about everyone. If you’re ready to play away from the marital bed, Heated Affairs is arguably your best option. Although you’ll have to shell out for a budget-friendly plan, you won’t be disappointed thanks to a huge user base and impressive privacy features.

How Secure is Ashley Madison? Like Really…

How Secure is Ashley Madison

Ashley Madison has remained the online platform of choice for married men looking to pursue extramarital affairs since 2001. Despite being one of the most established hookup sites around, Ashley Madison hasn’t been without its fair share of bad press. In 2015, hackers stole the personal details of more than 32 million Ashley Madison users.

How Secure is Ashley Madison?

Going by the name “The Impact Team“, this hacker group threatened to publish all the stolen information online if Ashley Madison didn’t shut down its services immediately. Ashley Madison called their bluff, but the hackers made good on their promise. In August of that year, the group leaked the details of millions of users, including real names, personal addresses, and platform search history.

The Aftermath

The Aftermath

Naturally, this data breach causes trouble for many married men who thought they were using the service discreetly. Furthermore, many Ashley Madison users found themselves at the mercy of criminals as extortionists combed through the reams of released data, threatening to contact spouses and girlfriends if ransoms weren’t paid.

How did this happen? Well, Ashley Madison didn’t have a great reputation for deleting user information in the past, even when users decided to stop using the service. Although Ashley Madison managed to survive the incident relatively unscathed, with the operator only forced to pay a paltry $1.6 million fine, there are continuing questions about how secure this hookup platform actually is.

What Changes Has Ashley Madison Implemented?

What Changes Has Ashley Madison Implemented

Wondering how Ashley Madison weathered the storm? Well, the company pulled out all the stops when it came to improving privacy and security. In the past, user details weren’t automatically deleted when someone wished to stop using the service. In fact, users had to pay a one-off cancellation fee to have their email addresses removed from the system and their accounts permanently suspended. Despite Ashley Madison securing a healthy stream of revenue from this tacked-on service, not everyone who paid for the option actually saw their details being sent to the virtual incinerator.

Nowadays, men using Ashley Madison can enjoy far more robust privacy measures. Two-factor authentication is now offered as standard, meaning there’s little chance of a hacker or suspicious spouse logging into an account. If you do choose to use two-factor authentication, bear in mind that this functionality is provided by a third party. This company, Nexmo, won’t leave your information vulnerable to attackers. However, should you decide to cancel your account with Ashley Madison, you’ll also need to contact this partner company to ensure they too have deleted all your data.

Furthermore, all payments are now anonymous. While men will still have to pay to purchase credits or activate additional subscriptions, Ashley Madison won’t be flagged up on any billing information. (See our post on how to get free credits on Ashley Madison)

Many adult-only websites sell stored data to third parties to generate additional revenue. Thankfully, Ashley Madison has committed to abandoning this practice. You may still find that you see personalized ads in your browser when using the desktop version of the site, but this is par for the course. If you’re serious about online privacy, you can make quick adjustments to your browser settings to prevent this from happening.

What Information Does Ashley Madison Store?

What Information Does Ashley Madison Store

As with any dating site, you’ll need to provide Ashley Madison with personal details to create an account and start using the matchmaking feature. You’ll need to provide a username, along with your current relationship status. Other required information includes your location and date of birth. You’ll also need to outline what you’re looking for regarding affair preferences. As well as that, you’ll need to provide some information regarding your appearance. Currently, this only extends to your weight and height.

Several information fields are optional. For example, you don’t need to provide a photo to create an Ashley Madison account. However, the chances of you landing a connection without a profile photo are slim to none. The good news is that you can use anonymity features to make your profile photos as discreet as possible.

You also have the option of using biometric identification (Touch ID) to access your account. While this is practical, especially if you’re an app or mobile-first user, you may be uncomfortable with sharing this level of information. However, it’s all about balancing risk. Yes, you are handing over biometric information, but you’re also bolstering the security credentials of your account.

Is the Ashley Madison App Secure?

Is the Ashley Madison App Secure

Ashley Madison currently offers an app for Android and iOS users. For many men, the option to use an app exclusively is not only convenient, but it also helps keep their extramarital activities as discreet as possible. That being said, there are some additional security concerns to consider if you’re an app-only user.

When using the browser-based version of Ashley Madison on a laptop or desktop computer, you won’t have to worry about disabling access to a camera or microphone. This isn’t the case with the Ashley Madison app. The app will automatically be able to access your onboard camera and microphone. This isn’t a security vulnerability as such. Rather, it’s to make capturing voice messages and taking photos to send via the platform as easy as possible. Nonetheless, you may wish to change your smartphone or tablet settings so the app has to ask you every time it requires access to these device features.

Furthermore, the app will track your location. Again, this is purely functional. It allows for automatic fetching of the nearest Ashley Madison users to make finding matches easy. However, as with camera and microphone access, you can change your device settings to manage this level of accessibility. For further tips on using the platform effectively, see our Ashley Madison Tips and Tricks article.

Are Your Details Protected When Using Ashley Madison?

Are Your Details Protected When Using Ashley Madison

There’s always a risk when using services like Ashley Madison. While the service has earned a bad reputation in recent years, it’s gone a long way in improving its security credentials. Nowadays, it’s just as secure as any other hookup platform. However, the average man using Ashley Madison has a lot to lose. To manage risk and reduce the chance of your details falling into the wrong hands, ensure you’re making full use of the privacy features available to you.

Don’t give away highly personal details in your bio. Likewise, if you’re using a photo, activate privacy features so only users you’re actively engaging with can see your galleries. Two-factor authentication is also worth using if you want to prevent third parties from accessing your account.

Finally, when the time comes to stop using Ashley Madison, make sure you’ve requested that your stored details are removed from any databases. Your information should be discarded automatically, but it’s worth emailing dpo@ashleymadison.com to make a form request. You can also contact this same email address to request amendments or access your details at any time.

What is Infidelity?

What is Infidelity?

Otherwise known as cheating, infidelity refers to the act of one partner being unfaithful to the other.

In most cases, it typically applies to sexual activity, but there’s no strict definition of what constitutes infidelity. More people are becoming aware of the concept of emotional infidelity, with these emotional betrayals often just as devastating for a relationship. Infidelity is also incredibly common.

Around 46% of people in long-term relationships have admitted to cheating on their spouse, with around 1 in 5 men guilty of infidelity. Women have long been considered the victims of infidelity, rather than the instigators of it. However, while only around 13% of women admit to cheating on their other halves, rates are skyrocketing.

What is Infidelity?

Nowadays, the issue of infidelity has become something of a gray area. As more of us explore non-traditional relationships and place different expectations on our partners, defining infidelity and understanding why it happens has become more difficult. To get a handle on the situation, it’s a good idea to explore the different types of infidelity in detail.

The One-Off Encounter

The One-Off Encounter

In the single world, this event is known as a one-night stand. However, opportunistic sex with a stranger is also one of the most common causes of infidelity in marriages and long-term relationships.

In most cases, there’s no real lead-up to this type of event. Both partners can be completely happy in their relationship, with no desire to pursue sexual connections with anyone else. However, all it takes is one ill-judged drink at an impromptu social event for one partner to make a life-changing decision.

Because this type of infidelity isn’t premeditated, it’s often easier for couples to overcome the betrayal. The wronged partner might feel angry and hurt, but they don’t feel emotionally betrayed. The cheating partner hasn’t actively gone out to seek sex with a stranger, they’ve simply acted at an opportune moment.

It’s one of the most common forms of infidelity. The rates are even higher if you take into account physical intimacy that doesn’t lead to full sex. In many cases, the act itself doesn’t actually get found out. The one who’s done the cheating might feel guilt and feel long-lasting anxiety about getting found out, but these feelings subside over time.

Although nobody should be looking to cheat if they’re in a loving long-term relationship, it’s often best to keep a one-night stand a buried secret. If the guilty party knows they’ve done wrong and makes a promise to themselves never to do it again, it’s usually a good idea to let sleeping dogs lie and move on.

However, while the wronged partner carries on with their lives oblivious to the fact they’ve been cheated on, the unfaithful partner needs to carry the weight of that guilt. Many times, it’s not the guilt itself that causes the most concern, it’s the anxiety that now that they’ve cheated, they have to contend with the reality that their partner might do the same in the future.

Romantic Affairs

Romantic Affairs

This is the most traditional form of infidelity and potentially the most damaging to a relationship. These entanglements typically begin life as an emotional affair, usually with a close friend or colleague. As romantic feelings develop, the prospect of an emotional affair boiling over into a sexual relationship becomes more likely.

Extramarital affairs can be devastating to couples and families. Why are they so catastrophic? It all comes down to their element of secrecy and cloak-and-dagger nature. Some affairs come to a head within a month, although around half of them can last for up to 12 months. Some affairs go on even longer, with around 30% of them enduring for more than two years.

Some people enjoy the thrill of carrying on two lives. Others might harbor very real feelings for both their spouse and their affair partner, making it impossible to choose between the two. No matter how you slice it, both mentalities are selfish.

The longer an affair simmers away, the more betrayed the wronged partner will feel. It’s almost impossible to repair a relationship once a longstanding romantic affair is discovered. While some affairs can blossom into conventional relationships, the future isn’t bright for these kinds of romantic entanglements. In fact, around 75% of marriages that start life as affairs, end in divorce.

Justified Infidelity?

Justified Infidelity

Sometimes, people pursue affairs with other people because they’re not happy with their present relationship. We’re not simply talking about a situation where someone feels unfulfilled at home. Rather, we’re talking about long-term relationships and marriages that have zero emotional attachment.

Some people end up in marriages at a young age. They might have felt thrown together with their partner due to economic circumstances and forced to marry to become more financially secure. In many cases, people simply don’t think through the long-term commitment involved with saying “I do“.

Occasionally, emotional attachments can develop over time, although a growing feeling of discontent is far more likely. In these relationships, pursuing romantic and sexual connections with other people can seem entirely justified.

In the case of married couples, there’s still the murky issue of those marriage vows. Chasing romance and sex with other people outside of the home is a definite betrayal. However, things aren’t as cut and dry if both parties are completely disinterested in a long-term future. In fact, there’s a good chance that both partners will be actively looking for connections outside of the marriage in this scenario.

Emotional Cheating

Emotional Cheating

Infidelity doesn’t have to end up in the bedroom. Emotional cheating is on the rise, with around 45% of men and 35% of women admitting to having had an emotional affair.

What is emotional cheating? Essentially, it’s when one partner develops an intimate and emotional attachment to someone who isn’t their spouse. This might be a casual acquaintance or close friend, although co-workers are also common participants in emotional affairs.

Sex might not be part of the equation, but the willingness to open up to someone who isn’t a spouse can be incredibly damaging to a relationship. The partner carrying out the emotional affair may discuss incredibly personal details with their affair partner, admitting things they’ve never considered bringing up with their actual spouse.

Sometimes, emotional affairs can progress to more conventional relationships. While sexual activity isn’t a staple of this type of affair, low-key physical intimacy isn’t entirely unheard of. When an emotional affair is discovered, the ramifications can be serious.

Women tend to have a harder time forgiving a partner for emotional infidelity. Moving past a single act of sexual infidelity isn’t always easy, but it tends to be far more manageable than dealing with the fact a spouse has become more emotionally attached to a relative stranger than you. Emotional infidelity suggests that something is fundamentally wrong with a relationship.

Can Relationships Move Past Infidelity?

Can Relationships Move Past Infidelity?

This all depends on the nature of the affair itself. Romantic affairs don’t have to be the end of a long-term relationship or marriage if they’re brought to an end within a few weeks. However, the longer they continue, the more fallout you can expect once the infidelity has been discovered.

One-night stands are also fairly easy to move past. Many men and women are guilty of giving in to their sexual urges from time to time. Some choose to admit their indiscretion, while others attempt to keep their affairs a secret. If you’re guilty of opportunistic infidelity, it’s up to you how you play your next move.

Can you live with the guilt of knowing what you did? Will you now be haunted by the prospect that your partner, just like you, has the capacity for engaging with one-off sex with someone else? Moving beyond this type of cheating is easier for those just starting a relationship, but those who are genuinely in love with their partner and in it for the long haul may have a harder time managing their guilt.

Finally, there’s the issue of emotional infidelity. Those engaged in an emotional affair might not realize the potential betrayal they’re committing. In fact, an emotional affair is often just a highly-charged friendship. However, there are warning signs to look out for to ensure you’re not straying too far into emotional infidelity territory. Is the person you’re engaging always taking your side? Are they going out of their way to paint your spouse in a bad light? We all need a little encouragement from time to time, but there’s a difference between having someone fight your corner and maintaining a clandestine friendship with someone who’s actively sabotaging your relationship.

Illicit Encounters Tips and Tricks

Illicit Encounters Tips and Tricks

If you’re seriously considering an affair, you’ll need a discreet online platform to connect with singles and like-minded married people. For years, the likes of Ashley Madison (Score the Best Connections: Expert Ashley Madison Tips) have been the first port of call for married men. However, other platforms like Illicit Encounters are definitely worth your time.

Illicit Encounters Tips and Tricks

Illicit Encounters hasn’t been around for as long as Ashley Madison, but it’s one of the more established hookup platforms on the internet. Currently, it’s only available to users based in the United Kingdom and Ireland, but there are more than a million registered users, making it one of the busiest sites of its kind.

Creating an account is free and easy, while a fairly equal gender balance means both men and women have plenty to discover here. Looking to make the most of Illicit Encounters? Read on for some essential tips and tricks to increase your odds of securing a no-strings hookup.

Is Illicit Encounters Legit?

Is Illicit Encounters Legit?

Illicit Encounters has been around since 2003, making it one of the oldest hookup sites on the web. It’s geared toward married users looking for no-strings sex and extramarital affairs. However, you don’t need to be in a long-term relationship to use this service.

It’s a fairly busy platform, with around 65% of registered members using the service regularly. There are also relatively few bots to worry about here, while scammer activity and fraud are largely unheard of. As this site is tailored toward the married crowd, expect a slightly older demographic when searching profiles on Illicit Encounters. The vast majority of users are aged between 32 and 55. If you’re looking for sexual encounters with anyone younger than this, you’re probably better off searching for connections elsewhere.

Creating an Account

To get started at Illicit Encounters, you’ll need to register and create an account. There’s not a lot you need to do here, rather than add your gender, country of residence, and date preferences. You’ll also need to provide your marital status, and current location, along with some contact details. You can then tailor your profile by uploading photos, listing hobbies, and other information.

One welcome feature of Illicit Encounters is that you don’t need to verify your account via an email account or telephone number. If you’re married and looking to cheat discreetly, this will come as good news.

Putting Together a Winning Profile

Putting Together a Winning Profile

If you want to attract attention on this platform, you’ll need a standout profile. Filling out a short and snappy bio will go a long way in showcasing you to other users. Try and keep it succinct. Avoid overlong sentences and try and whittle things down to a few killer sentences if you can. Less is always more. Your aim here is to leave other users itching to find out more. You’re more likely to end up with an inbox full of messages if you’ve left an air of mystery in your bio.

It’s important to fill out every section. At best, an incomplete profile is going to make you like someone who’s only half-interested in hooking up. At worst, other users might look at your bio and suspect they are dealing with a fake profile or scammer.

Make Use of All the Available Features

Sadly, Illicit Encounters doesn’t offer a mobile app yet. However, the main platform is packed with handy features that make it easy to find sexual partners for one-off meetings or long-term arrangements. The matchfinder feature is arguably the most useful function of this platform. Provided you’ve filled out your profile fully and listed all your preferences, you’ll quickly be presented with an expansive list of suitable candidates to connect with.

Worried about privacy? If you’re cheating on your spouse and don’t want to run the risk of a casual acquaintance seeing what you’re up to on Illicit Encounters, it’s always best to set your albums to private. You’ll probably want to keep at least one profile photo as your calling card, but the rest of your galleries can be locked down with password protection.

Are you heading away on vacation? Perhaps you’re busy with work for the foreseeable future. Rather than let your profile become inactive and incoming messages left unanswered, make use of the Illicit Encounters ‘Holiday Mode’. You can use this feature to temporarily suspend your profile for three weeks. This prevents would-be suitors from messaging you when you can’t answer. What’s more, it also removes your profile from search results. You’ll only appear to other users when you’re available to talk and meet.

Illicit Encounters also lets you browse the platform in ‘Invisible Mode’. This feature keeps your profile from appearing live as you sift through other profiles. Perfect if you’re new to the platform and worried you might virtually bump into someone you know.

Make Quick Work of Responding to Other Users

If you can only schedule a few moments each day to use Illicit Encounters, it can be hard to keep on top of incoming messages. You don’t want to leave messages unanswered in case you miss out on an opportunity for sex with a stunning stranger. Thankfully, you can use auto-responders to let users know you’re interested in talking further, without you having to actually type out a response. Once this automated message has been sent, they know you’re interested and you can pick up with a more involved response at a later point.

You can also use something called prepared responses to save you time when using illicit Encounters. These are essentially message templates you can pull from in a pinch. You can use them if you’re feeling uninspired, or turn to them if you’ve got a great opening line in the bank. If you’re looking to connect with as many people as possible, prepared responses are the way to go.

Make Suggestions to Illicit Encounters on How They Can Improve

Illicit Encounters welcomes feedback from its users. You have a couple of ways you can share your input. The platform is constantly running polls to judge opinions on new site features and changes. If you’ve had trouble with a new feature, use these polls to let Illicit Encounters know you’re not happy with the changes. Likewise, if you’ve welcomed a new update, show your support with a positive review.

Illicit Encounters also welcomes more in-depth feedback. You can use the ‘Letters to Sara’ customer support feature to send more detailed insights into how you think the platform is performing. Do you think the site is severely lacking in one department? Don’t be afraid to share your suggestions. Illicit Encounters is incredibly popular, but it has a fairly modest user base. The site operators want to keep their users happy, so all feedback is appreciated. Who knows, your feedback might lead to a new feature that will increase your chances of securing your next hookup.

How to Make Your Money Go Further

How to Make Your Money Go Further

Although you can create an account without paying a cent, Illicit Encounters isn’t free. The payment system works similarly to Ashley Madison, in that women can use the service without paying, but men need to pay for a subscription package and credits.

There are two subscription packages to choose from. The basic Gold package costs £140 per month. You’ll be able to unlock most site features, although this is fairly expensive for any dating site. Gold Plus is even pricier, costing £170 per month. However, you can make a significant saving if you pay for two months upfront. An 8-week subscription will cost you a relatively affordable £200, which works out as the cheapest way to access Illicit Encounters.

On top of a subscription, men can purchase credits. These need to be purchased in bundles, with a stack of 3,000 credits costing £20. These credits are only really useful for sending things like virtual gifts, so you need to weigh up whether or not you can justify the expense. Although Illicit Encounters will appear discreetly on any credit or debit card statement, you’ll probably want to limit the number of unexplained transactions on any bill if there’s a chance your spouse will be opening your mail.

Is Illicit Encounters Worth It?

If you’re based in the UK or Ireland and want to make online connections for sex, Illicit Encounters is a great option. It may only boast around a million users, but this is a fairly high number considering it’s only available in a couple of countries. What’s more, everyone here is after the same thing. Provided you’ve taken the time to create a premium profile and are ready to put in the work with messaging other users, you shouldn’t have any trouble hooking up.

It’s not the most affordable option out there and, once again, male users get the raw end of the deal. However, if you can justify forking out £200 for eight weeks of access, you’ll enjoy one of the most user-friendly hookup sites on the planet. If you’re paying for a Gold Plus account, make sure you’re responding to all messages. If you’re tight on time, use auto-responders and message templates to keep on top of all your incoming communications.

What Does Cheating Say About a Person?

What Does Cheating Say About a Person?

Cheating is more common than you might think. According to a recent survey, around 46% of people in committed relationships have engaged in infidelity at some point or other. While men have long got a bad rap for being the instigators of affairs, the gender balance has evened out in recent years. In other words, women are almost just as likely to cheat as men.

What Does Cheating Say About a Person?

Infidelity doesn’t have to mean death for a relationship. In fact, around 25% of marriages affected by affairs will weather the storm. That being said, once one partner betrays the other’s trust, it’s hard to fully repair a relationship. The pieces might be glued back together, but fractures still remain. Suspicion remains a staple of these relationships, while complete trust is rarely ever regained.

Why then do so many people choose to risk it all by jumping into bed with someone else? More to the point, what does cheating actually say about a person? Are you the guilty party who’s been caught with their pants down? Perhaps you’re the one who’s been cheated on. Understanding the reasons why people cheat can help both partners overcome infidelity.

People Cheat Because They’re Unhappy with a Relationship

People Cheat Because They're Unhappy with a Relationship

This is an obvious one. Someone in a happy relationship with a full and healthy sex life isn’t likely to be looking elsewhere. Even if someone is momentarily tempted, the fact that they’re fulfilled by their primary relationship is enough to nip any ideas of playing away in the bud.

However, if someone isn’t exactly enjoying a happy home life, it’s easy to give in to temptation. A casual compliment by a flirty coworker is all it takes to get the ball rolling. A drunken fumble on a night out can easily turn into an ill-judged night of sexual infidelity.

The Love Was Never There in the First Place

Every relationship experiences a honeymoon period. Those halcyon days when everything is seen through rose-tinted glasses are great, but they quickly give way to the humdrum realities of everyday life. However, most people accept a new normal. They not be feeling that electricity every time they see their partner and nightly sex sessions may have subsided to a more occasional arrangement, but the relationship itself is still enriching.

While most relationships get off to a great start, some start badly. Many people fall into relationships for the wrong reasons. Maybe they’re seeking financial security. Perhaps they simply don’t want to be the single friend in a friendship group dominated by happy couples. In both of these scenarios, it’s easy for people to pursue loveless arrangements with partners they’re never particularly invested in.

Without any real feelings to use as a benchmark, it’s easy for people to cheat. They might realize what they’re doing is ethical, but because they don’t actually have feelings for their partner, they don’t see cheating as a genuine act of betrayal.

Low Self-Esteem

Low Self-Esteem

It sounds like passing the buck, but having low self-esteem can lead to people being more likely to cheat. A rock-bottom ego is a key reason why many men cheat on their partners. Why? Indulging in no-strings sex with a complete stranger is a surefire way of bolstering low self-esteem.

It’s not hard to see why so many people fall into this trap and cheat. If you don’t hold yourself in high regard and have severe hangups about your appearance, the reality of someone showing a romantic or sexual interest in you can be life-affirming. When someone shows you an ounce of unexpected attention, it’s hard to say no and not give in to your instincts.

People with low self-esteem aren’t necessarily shy and retiring types. In fact, they might actively go out looking for validation from people outside of their primary relationship. Here, we’re entering narcissist territory.

They’re Good at Lying

Being able to lie convincingly is an art form. For a habitual cheater, being able to lie well is an essential skill. If someone realizes they can easily pull the wool over their partner’s eyes, it can lead to some pretty problematic behavior. They’ll actively avoid spending time with their other half to socialize with friends or pursue their own interests. A quick spin about staying late at work or attending to family commitments is all it takes to get their spouse off their backs.

Liars are also far more likely to cheat. If they can easily convince their partner they were working late when they were downing shots with friends, coming up with a cover for a seedy night of sex with a stranger isn’t a huge leap.

They Don’t Actually Want to be in a Relationship

This isn’t the same thing as someone not being in love with the person they’re in a relationship with. Rather, it simply means that someone entered into a monogamous relationship without thinking things through. Many people in their twenties and thirties enter into committed relationships without considering the implications. In no time at all, they realize that they’re not ready to commit.

Maybe they’ve only had a few sexual partners and feel like they’re missing out. Perhaps they feel like they’ve settled for someone out of fear of not being able to find anyone else. When these feelings kick in, it’s best to step back and reconsider your options. It might be painful to break off a relationship just because you’re halfway uncertain about its future, but it’s better than breaking someone emotionally when they find out you’ve been sleeping around behind their back.

Cheating isn’t Black and White

Cheating isn't Black and White

Cheating is a complex issue. Those doing the cheating are, without a doubt, always the guilty party. However, they’re not always the villains of the piece. Sometimes, cheating is instigated by low self-esteem or a rocky relationship that’s toxic for both parties involved. Other times, cheaters are going to cheat. They’ll actively pursue sex with just about anyone, without any consideration for an oblivious partner at home.

Zoosk Tips and Tricks

Zoosk Tips and Tricks

Zoosk began life as a Facebook feature. Since 2007, this innovative dating platform has emerged as one of the most popular services of its kind. As of 2022, Zoosk boasts around 40 million active users, with eager singles based in more than 80 countries. It’s not only one of the largest dating and hookup sites online, but also one of the most reliable. There are relatively few complaints about fake profiles and scams, while user satisfaction remains consistently high.

Zoosk Tips and Tricks

New to Zoosk? This user-friendly platform makes it easy to connect with other singles (and sometimes affair partners) in your area or pick up a stranger for no-strings sex while traveling. Struggling with your success rate? We’ve put together some invaluable tips and tricks to help you on your way.

Getting Started with Zoosk

Getting Started with Zoosk

If you already have a Facebook account, getting started with Zoosk is incredibly simple. You can simply synchronize your Facebook profile with a Zoosk account. However, you don’t need to be registered with the social media platform to access Zoosk. You can simply create a unique Zoosk account via the website or by downloading the app. The good news is that Zoosk is available via both Google Play and the Apple Store, making it accessible to just about everyone, no matter what device you’re using.

Regardless of how you choose to register, you won’t be charged to start using Zoosk. It’s not a free service if you want to unlock premium features, but you want to be billed a cent unless you opt into a paid subscription. Currently, basic Zoosk subscriptions cost as little as $12.49 per month.

Creating Your Profile

Putting together a Zoosk profile is incredibly easy. Once you’ve registered, you’ll be asked a series of questions that will be used to craft your user profile. To increase your odds of landing connections, be it meaningful relationships or no-strings sexual encounters, avoid the urge to lie when answering these questions. Be upfront about what you look like, what you’re into, and what you’re looking for. Other users are going to use this information to decide whether or not to engage with you, so there’s no point wasting anyone’s time.

Another reason to be upfront is that Zoosk uses this information to match you with other users. There are some pretty advanced algorithms at work here, with Zoosk quickly matching you up with the most compatible users in your vicinity. If you’ve painted yourself in the wrong light, you’re not going to land anyone who’s going to be genuinely interested in taking things further with you.

Review Your Bio Before it Goes Live

It seems obvious, but it’s important your bio and profile information is as accurate as possible. We’re not just talking about honest information, either. Before publishing your bio, make sure you’ve proofread the text for any errors. Even the odd spelling mistake is going to stick out like a sore thumb. People are less likely to take the time to respond to or message people who haven’t bothered to craft a legible profile. Make sure you’re not falling at the first hurdle.

Upload a Variety of Profile Photos

Even if you’re starting out with a free account, Zoosk lets you upload several photos to your profile. You’ll want a killer headshot to get things started. A selfie is fine, but just make sure it’s a decent shot. If you have a professional headshot, use that. A bathroom selfie taken in front of a vanity mirror is definitely a no.

Explicit photos are also something you’ll want to avoid. There may be a time and place to share these later on, but your Zoosk profile isn’t the platform for your thirst snaps. Instead, delve into your photo library and look for inspiring snaps from your travels. Use images to showcase your interests and passions, not just what you look like. You’re not only going to present yourself as an interesting prospect, but you’ll also give other users something to draw upon when asking you questions.

Your Bio Should Be Unique

Pretty much everyone’s used a dating app at some point in their life, so don’t play coy when crafting your bio. There really isn’t any place for an opening line like

“not really sure what to put here…”

in this day and age.

Your bio is your opening line, your main marketing angle. Be specific, not broad. Love to travel? Great, so do most people. Get into the details. Mention where you’ve been, and why you like to travel. Big music fan? We’ve all got a pair of earphones. Listing a band you love is all well and good, but identifying a particular album or track will show you actually care about what you’re typing into your profile.

Don’t Come Across as a Difficult Customer

Don't Come Across as a Difficult Customer

Plenty of people turn to dating apps and hookup sites (like Ashley Madison)  out of desperation. However, you can’t expect people to respond to a list of demands and exacting requirements. Whatever you do, avoid listing what physical features you’re looking for in a partner. What’s more, never get into sexual preferences this early in the game. It’s fine to mention your orientation and whether you’re looking for casual fun or something more serious, but anything beyond that is going to put prospective matches off (Stay Discreet and Safe: Ashley Madison Privacy Tips and Tricks).

People won’t want to get into a conversation with someone who seems challenging. Connecting via Zoosk and similar platforms is a game of give and take. You might feel like you’re saving time by getting the specifics out of the way early, but you can always abandon a conversation quickly if you don’t think it’s moving in the right direction. If you’re using Zoosk, you should be open to new opportunities.

Regularly Refresh Your Profile

If you’re an active Zoosk user, keep your profile current with regular updates. We’re not suggesting you use your Zoosk bio as an online journal, but you should definitely be refreshing your gallery from time to time. Been on vacation? Upload one or two travel snaps. Not been getting many responses or incoming messages? Your profile is probably lacking. Adding more content will make it a much more attractive prospect to potential matches.

Making Your First Move

Sending your first message over Zoosk can be daunting. However, you can streamline the process by doing your homework. Don’t just drop a message to someone because you like the look of them. First, scour their profile to find talking points you can draw on. Mention specific details you’ve picked from their images. Let them know you’ve taken the time to read what they’ve actually written. They might not necessarily want to jump into bed with you, but they’ll appreciate the fact you’ve taken the time to learn more about them.

Don’t Lead With Sleaze

Don't Lead With Sleaze

There are millions of people looking to find a lay via Zoosk, but it’s worth remembering that it’s not a sex-first hookup site. As such, you really shouldn’t be leading with a sleazy pickup line. Instead, keep it sincere, even if your first message sounds a little tepid.

If you quickly realize you’re dealing with someone with few inhibitions, you can up the ante a little. That being said, you probably don’t want to be chasing an initial greeting with a dick pic.

Is Zoosk Worth Your Time?

If you’re already using Facebook, you should definitely think about adding the Zoosk app to your phone. You can have a Zoosk profile live and ready to go in minutes. There are millions of users waiting to connect with like-minded singles. What’s more, it’s one of the most advanced dating platforms in terms of matchmaking. Provided you’ve added relevant information to your profile, you’ll be matched up with compatible users in no time.

Zoosk is also incredibly affordable. A monthly subscription costs a fraction of what you can expect to pay to use other platforms, despite Zoosk offering fairly extensive features. It’s not exactly designed with sex-crazed users in mind, but there’s no shortage of adventurous users actively using this service.

How To Cheat On A Business Trip With Ease

How To Cheat On A Business Trip With Ease

If you’re worried about getting away with cheating, there’s no better cover than a business trip. I mean think about it, it’s the perfect way to cheat on your wife without having to worry too much about hiding it. In fact, cheating on a business trip is actually one of the most common ways that people cheat on their partners. How many times have you heard of bosses sleeping with their secretaries, or work colleagues that have stared at each other and flirted around the copier machine, worse still, an escort.

How To Cheat On A Business Trip With Ease

For me, I never did any of the above. Whilst I did mess around on business trips – I loved being the random guy in a bar and meeting wonderful women. I could be whomever I wanted. I got to change my name, pretend I was single, meet new and exciting people – and it was perfect.

I got to practice my flirting, whilst being guilt free. Not that I really feel much guilt when I cheat. But nonetheless, being in a different country meant I didn’t have to look over my back and watch the door for people coming and going.

Meeting Women In Hotel Bars

Meeting Women In Hotel Bars

I’ve always found that hotel bars are an excellent place to find potential hookups for the night / trip. Of course, wearing a wedding ring is going to get you nowhere, but without one, you can be anyone. Think of an amazing cover story. Be someone interesting, makeup a fascinating job – be whomever you want to be and stick to that story.

The beauty is if you get to the bar early enough, you may even find someone to have dinner with. And if you’ve been having affairs as long as I have, it’s harder to have a relaxing dinner with an affair partner than it is to have sex. Being seen is the ultimate fear.

Roma

Rome

Just recently, I found myself at the bar of an Internationally Branded Hotel in Rome. Of course I had hoped to hook up with a nice young Italian thing, but lo and behold – very few Italians were staying there. After about an hour, I was beginning to realise that perhaps I was going to have no luck. Just like a movie, right before I was about to head out and hit the local bars, a group of air stewardesses checked in and immediately hit the bar.

Within minutes, I’d found some sort of pretext to go over and chat to them, and before long, I was buying a few rounds of drinks. Initially, I wasn’t sure which of them would like me. Let’s be fair, they have their pick of men, but before long, one of them was getting overly flirty, whilst the other 2 were encouraging her to go out for dinner with me.

To cut a long story short, dinner was excellent. The fables that stewardesses have will blow your mind, and of course heading back to the same hotel we were holding hands. It was inevitable that we ended up back in her room for a night of steamy sex.

Looking To Meet Locals

When it comes to meeting locals, it always comes down to local bars or clubs. Both work really well. I’ve had luck in the past in Paris at a local bar. In this one bar, there were these local group of women would go there every Saturday, and whilst they enjoyed each other’s company – everyone in the bar was a regular; which meant they already had escapades with some of the people in there and new people were a breathe of fresh air.

And that’s what I am and was. A breathe of fresh air.

I have no shame or fear of going over to a group of woman and starting a conversation. The worst that has ever happened is that they’ve told me that they’re busy and I should disappear. But typically, they view it as a bit of fun, and as long as you’re generous enough to buy a round or two – chances are they’ll get you to sit and join them.

I’d even go as far as to stay that if you get a few of them laughing, someone is coming back to your hotel room, I can promise you that.

Hooking Up In Clubs

I’m 40. I feel I’ve long past stopped enjoying clubs. I’m not embarrassed to say but they’re just too loud. However, only a few years ago, you’d find me in the middle of the dance floor dancing away. Why, not because I love dancing, but because women do. And whenever I’d be dancing away, I’d always catch the eye of some young, pretty thing wanting to dance with me.

And once they’re dancing with me, it wasn’t too out the ordinary to be putting my hands on them. Whether I was holding their hips to make sure we danced to the same rhythm or having them grinding on me. And every time I danced with a girl, whilst they may not have always come back with me to my room, it always led to some very steamy make out session in a dark corner of the club. Sadly, I’m not sure I could do that nowadays.

Cheating Whilst Away On Business

I don’t often have business trips away. For me I wait till life gets on top of me and I’m craving a solo trip away, and then I invent an imaginary business trip for a few days. It cures of all of life’s stresses.

How to Get Free Credits for Ashley Madison

How to Get Free Credits for Ashley Madison

For married men and guys in long-term relationships, Ashley Madison is an incredibly effective platform for hooking up with sexy singles, married women and MILFs. If you’re looking to get an extramarital affair off the ground or want no-strings sex with none of the baggage, there are few better places to find a willing affair partner

How to Get Free Credits for Ashley Madison

Compared to other platforms, Ashley Madison is incredibly secure. Furthermore, it’s one of the more discreet adult dating platforms. Even if you’re a first-time user with little experience playing the field, you shouldn’t have too much trouble finding someone to take the bait on Ashley Madison. However, all of this comes at a cost. While it’s free for men to create an account with Ashley Madison, you’ll ultimately need to start splashing out on credits to connect with women. 

How Do Ashley Madison Credits Work?

How Do Ashley Madison Credits Work?

Ashley Madison is different from many other dating services in that it doesn’t employ a traditional subscription model. Instead, male users will need to shell out for credit plans. Currently, there are different pricing tiers available. A Basic plan will set you back $59 and grant you 100 credits.

This works out at $0.59 for each credit. A Classic plan will cost you $169, but you’ll receive 500 credits. This plan is particularly popular with users, with an average cost of $0.34 per credit. If you’re prepared to spend a little more, it’s worth investing in an Elite plan.

It’s expensive at $289, but you’ll receive 1000 credits for your trouble. This works out at $0.29 per credit, meaning you’re paying half of what you’d be forking out for credits with a Basic plan. 

You can purchase credits on an ad-hoc basis. However, Ashley Madison will prompt you with a “Top Up” option when making your first purchase. This essentially works like an auto-renew subscription, adding new credits to your account every month that can be used to carry on the conversation with eager women. 

Can You Get Free Credits?

Ashley Madison doesn’t charge women to use the platform, so it pretty much depends on the revenues generated from credits sold to male users. However, there are a few ways you can limit the amount you’re spending on credits. 

The Member Initiated Contact Fee (MIC fee) is one way to make your money go further. Once you’ve created an account and purchased credits for the first time, you’ll be asked whether you want to sign up for this feature. If you’re enrolled in the MIC fee scheme, you won’t have to use any credits to send a reply to someone who has messaged you. However, you’ll still need to use credits to make the first move with other users. If you’re a regular user who uses the service daily, you may want to consider taking advantage of the MIC fee. 

That being said, the MIC fee can only be used at no cost for one month. After that, you’ll need to commit to a secondary subscription that currently costs $29.99 per month. If you’re already spending money on a credit plan, this is one cost you might find hard to swallow. Furthermore, the overall value of this subscription hinges on women making the effort to message you directly. 

Ashley Madison Free Trial

Ashley Madison Free Trial

If you want to test the waters with Ashley Madison, it’s best to take advantage of the 30-day free trial with MIC fee perks included. As mentioned previously, you’ll only be able to send messages without spending credits if a woman initiates contact. However, pretty much every other Ashley Madison feature is available to you. 

You can create a full profile and start adding photos immediately. The richer your profile, the more inviting you’ll be to potential prospects. Creating a killer profile with attractive photos is a surefire way of catching the interest of prospective dates, making it more likely that your inbox will be inundated with messages. 

Furthermore, you’re free to see who’s actually using Ashley Madison in your area. Some men might be prepared to travel for the occasional hookup, but if you’re looking for a long-term arrangement, you’ll want to connect with someone who lives fairly nearby. Before you start spending a small fortune on Ashley Madison credits, make sure there are enough active users in your area (and not bots) to make the investment worthwhile. 

When to Start Spending on Ashley Madison Credits

When to Start Spending on Ashley Madison Credits

If there are plenty of nearby prospects, spending money on credits is unavoidable. Even with the best profile, you’re not going to invite incoming messages from everyone you’re interested in. However, it doesn’t cost anything to browse and you can start creating a shortlist of targets for when you’ve purchased credits. If you go all in with an Elite plan straight away, it’s tempting to fire off messages indiscriminately. When you’ve got 1000 credits in the bank, you might not feel the pinch from sending the occasional message. However, each message you send will cost you 5 credits. If you’re contacting dozens of women every week, this quickly adds up. 

Use your free trial period as a practice run for the real thing. Put some effort into creating a captivating profile that will get you noticed, even if you’re utilizing anonymity features to keep your profile discreet. If you don’t land many responses in the first few weeks, the chances are your profile needs work. Don’t be afraid to constantly tinker with your profile to improve your odds of landing a connection. 

Are Elite Plans Worth It?

If you’re looking to kickstart an affair, you’ll probably have already committed to the idea of spending some money. However, forking out more than £200 per month on Ashley Madison credits can be a bitter pill to swallow. Thankfully, this popular platform isn’t shy about offering its loyal customers a little kickback. 

Ashley Madison currently offers something called an “Affair Guarantee Program“. You’ll qualify for this if you fork out for an Elite credit plan. If after three months you fail to secure a match, you may be eligible for a refund. However, Ashley Madison is pretty tight when it comes to terms and conditions. 

Going by the current rules, you’ll need to have added a minimum of one photo to your profile. Furthermore, your profile will need to remain visible at all times. Additionally, you’ll need to have reached out to at least 18 Ashley Madison users and used the instant messaging feature for at least one hour for every month you’ve been using the service. Provide you meet these requirements, you should have no issues getting your outlying costs reimbursed.

You’ll be probably asking if Ashley Madison works, or if it’s even worth it. The truth is, I’ve had huge success on Ashley Madison and have some of my best cheating episodes on that very site. So for me, I’m all about it, all the time. For some unique tips on getting the most out of Ashley Madison, see my tips and tricks article. To learn more about places to find affair partners, check out our post on Top Extramarital Dating Platforms.

AdultFriendFinder Tips and Tricks By An Experienced User

AdultFriendFinder Tips and Tricks

With more than 80 million users worldwide, AdultFriendFinder is one of the largest adult dating sites on the planet. Although there tend to be more men using the service than women, single guys and those looking to play the field should have no trouble finding like-minded singles and adventurous couples to play with and / or have mind blowing affairs.

AdultFriendFinder Tips and Tricks

AdultFriendFinder Tips and Tricks

Currently, AdultFriendFinder is open to everyone. It’s absolutely free to create a profile and start searching, while a premium service is also available to paying users. If you’re looking to get the most out of AdultFriendFinder, it’s definitely worth paying to use the service. However, no matter whether you’re using the platform for free or paying for advanced features, you’ll need to know how to get the most out of this adult-only site. Below, we explore some essential tips and tricks to ensure you’re getting your money’s worth.

Creating a First-Class Profile

As with any dating website, a great profile is going to go a long way in getting you noticed. Because of the nature of AdultFriendFinder, you don’t need to be coy about the content included in your bio. People might be using the service to test the waters, but sex is certainly the order of the day.

That being said, avoid cramming your bio with your personal kinks and sexual preferences. You can touch upon how far you’re going to go in the bedroom, but save the beat-by-beat description for when you’re exchanging messages with other users.

Showcase Yourself with a Winning Photo

AdultFriendFinder Tips and Tricks

The average AdultFriendFinder user is going to be pretty open-minded, so movie-star looks aren’t going to be a deal breaker. However, you’ll want to present yourself in a good light. After all, nobody’s going to want to waste time on someone if they don’t find them physically attractive. The photo you choose to market yourself is a key tool in your arsenal, so don’t reach for the first image in your photo gallery. Likewise, avoid the usual pitfalls many fall into when selecting a profile photo.

Keep things simple. You want to avoid being too flashy, so avoid posing in front of a car, especially if you don’t actually own the vehicle in question. Travel snaps are a good idea, but again, avoid coming across like a poser. A shirtless selfie at the beach is fine, but just make sure it’s a recent pic and you’re in a similar shape now to when the photo was taken.

Speaking of selfies, don’t settle for second-rate images. You don’t want to be using an image that was taken on a smartphone that was released a decade ago. Got a passable headshot that was taken for a LinkedIn profile? Think about using that instead. You can always share more intimate photos with singles and couples down the line if you think a casual meet might be on the cards.

Finally, keep friends and acquaintances out of your profile pics. For starters, you run the risk of giving your identity away if another user recognizes someone in the lineup. Furthermore, you might not be doing yourself any favors if one of your friends is better looking than you. Your aim here is to show yourself off, not leave yourself in the shadow of a more attractive friend.

Stand Out with a Singular Username and Captivating Headline

An eye-catching photo is all well and good, but you’ll need more to draw the attention of other AdultFriendFinder users. Think long and hard when choosing a suitable username. You don’t want something generic that people are likely to forget. Instead, make it personal. Tie into your interests and details outlined in your bio. Furthermore, ditch the digits when creating a username.

Every good profile starts with a great headline. Get creative when it comes to writing yours. You can use humor for maximum impact. Even though it’s not the best idea to put too much kink into an AdultFriendFinder profile, you can use a headline to nod towards more adult-only content.

Load Your Profile with Keywords

Load Your Profile with Keywords

As a free user, you won’t have to pay to receive messages. If you want to log in to find a full inbox, you’ll need to have a captivating profile that catches people’s interest. Other people will be looking for connections by using search filters and using keywords. You can increase your odds of catching someone’s interest by filling your profile with suitable keywords.

Talk about your hobbies and interests for an easy way to rank higher in search results. However, make sure you’re not being too broad. Love to socialize with friends? Mention what you get up to, with specific phrases that are going to get you noticed and ranking well in search results.

Don’t Overbake Your Bio

An effective bio needs to provide sufficient information about yourself to other users. However, you should keep things brief. Focus on a few of your key selling points and touch upon your interests. However, avoid writing out your entire life story.

An exhaustive bio isn’t just difficult to read, it also runs the risk of leaving fellow users stumped when it comes to breaking the ice. You might think that a lengthy profile is going to grease the wheels when it comes to communicating, but other users may be left scratching their heads when it comes to singling out a starter question. Keep things open-ended, and leave an element of mystery in the mix. Furthermore, the more you write, the more likely you are to start touching upon negative aspects.

Consider Upgrading to a Premium Account

You can create an AdultFriendFinder profile for free. What’s more, you can also use many features at no cost. However, beyond browsing profiles and receiving messages, there’s not a great deal you can do on this site without shelling out some cash.

It’s definitely worth upgrading to a Gold account if you want to get the most out of AdultFriendFinder. Currently, a Gold account will set you back $24.95 a month. This is pretty inexpensive compared to other dating platforms. If this is too pricey for you, you can make a saving by committing to a long-term plan and paying for a 6-month or 12-month subscription in one go. A 6-month subscription will cost you $90, which works out to $19.95 per month. If you can afford to pay $180 for a 12-month plan, you’ll only be paying $14.95 per month.

Know How to Spot a Bot

Bots are becoming increasingly common problems on dating apps and hookup sites (especially on Ashley Madison). AdultFriendFinder isn’t overwhelmed with them, but you’ll still encounter them from time to time if you’re using the service enough.

Although AdultFriendFinder is fairly affordable, you don’t want to waste precious time chatting with someone who’s not really there. Thankfully, identifying a bot is relatively easy. Are you getting instant responses to your outgoing messages? Some people type faster than others, but nobody’s fingers work at lightspeed. Are the responses you’re getting barely relevant to the questions you’re asking? Take this as a sign an artificial intelligence has compiled what’s landed in your inbox.

Keep an Eye Out for Scammers

Keep an Eye Out for Scammers

It’s not just bots you’ll want to keep an eye out for. Fake profiles and scammers are rife on most platforms and AdultFriendFinder is no different. You may be speaking with someone for days or weeks before you smell a rat. The good news is that there are some fairly obvious red flags to watch out for.

Has the conversation quickly steered toward money? One of the most commonly-used tools used by scammers is a sob story about financial trouble. Maybe they need a bridge loan to cover a vehicle repair. Perhaps an unexpected bill is disrupting their schedule and interfering with a planned meet the two of you had arranged. There’s a rare chance you might be dealing with someone sincere, but don’t take the bait. After all, would you dream of begging for cash from someone you’d only ever spoken to online?

Don’t Waste Time With Inactive Profiles

Don't Waste Time With Inactive Profiles

There are quite a few dead profiles to sift through on AdultFriendFinder. The operator isn’t particularly proactive when it comes to getting rid of these, so you’ll tend to find at least a few ghost profiles in your search results. Check to see when a profile was last updated if you’re not getting any responses to outgoing messages.

Is AdultFriendFinder Worth It?

Looking for no-strings sex, casual encounters and perhaps the odd affair partner? AdultFriendFinder is a great platform for men and women alike to find willing sex partners for anything-goes encounters. There are plenty of eager users waiting to connect with you on this platform. Admittedly, you’ll need to deal with your fair share of bots and fake profiles, but a little due diligence will keep you safe.

You’ll need a killer profile to get you noticed here, but putting together a brilliant bio isn’t rocket science. Finally, AdultFriendFinder is incredibly affordable. Provided you can fork out for a 12-month subscription in one go, it’s actually one of the cheapest hookup sites around.

How Common is Cheating in Marriage?

How Common is Cheating in Marriage

Infidelity is more common than you might think. According to recent studies, around 75% of men in a committed relationship have admitted to cheating on their spouse at least once. Historically, gender differences have meant the rates of female infidelity have been slightly slower. However, the fairer sex is quickly catching up, with infidelity statistics suggesting almost as many women cheat on their partners as men do. 

How Common is Cheating in Marriage?

Extramarital sex and the occasional fling aren’t always considered relationship-ending events outside of marriage. However, for married couples, infidelity can be catastrophic. Admittedly, fewer married people commit adultery than those in casual relationships. However, the statistics are still quite striking. It’s estimated that up to 40% of married men have had an affair. Meanwhile, between 20-25% of married women admit to having been unfaithful. However, these are the only people who report cheating. It’s almost certain that the statistics are far higher across all age groups. 

What Motivates Married Couples to Cheat?

What Motivates Married Couples to Cheat

There are many reasons why someone may be looking to cheat on their partner and pursue extramarital sex. Generally speaking, the root cause lies with dissatisfaction with home lives. An argument could have driven a wedge between a married couple, while one partner could be exhibiting controlling behavior. If someone has suffered under the yoke of a spouse for many years and their self-esteem has taken a beating, an extramarital affair may be just what they need to bolster their ego. 

Some people might feel neglected by their other half. If they feel as though there’s a lack of love and affection at home, they’re far more likely to pursue emotional affairs. These might seem innocent enough, but they’re still a betrayal. What’s more, many emotional affairs have the potential to evolve into sexual relationships. 

When Flirting Crosses the Line

When Flirting Crosses the Line

While some affairs may be limited to a one-night stand or ill-judged hookup with a colleague, others take a long time to get off the ground. For many people who cheat, the final decision to embark on an affair isn’t an easy one. It’s usually the result of years-long frustration, emotional neglect, and withering self-esteem. 

Many couples may be unhappy with their arrangement from the off. Perhaps a couple rushed into marriage young or decided to tie the knot after an unexpected pregnancy. Both male and female partners may think that they’ve missed out on their sexual prime by locking themselves down to a long-term partner. Over the years, the idea of pursuing extramarital sex may have been lingering in the back of the brain. These urges may have been dismissed for years, but eventually, frustrations come to a boil and a nasty enough altercation could lead one partner to pursue sex elsewhere. 

Nowadays, statistics show that both genders pursue extramarital affairs relatively equally. However, men and women tend to pursue affairs and extramarital sex for different reasons. 

Why Do Married Men Cheat?

Happily married men can turn into cheating spouses for a multitude of reasons. In most cases, it’s a combination of factors that leads to a married man becoming unfaithful. Most men admit to neglect being key driving factor behind their desire to cheat. They have been happily married for many years, but a lack of emotional connection at home can easily drive them into the arms, and bed, of another woman. 

It Takes Two to Tango

It Takes Two to Tango

Men are more likely to cheat if they’re given the opportunity. Although men are unlikely to pursue sex with mutual friends and female acquaintances, the workplace presents plenty of opportunities for them to connect with single women. Approximately 19% of people have admitted to cheating on their partner with a work colleague. What’s more, more than half of people have enjoyed an office romance at some point in time. If there are issues at home, a booze-fuelled office party provides the perfect conditions for an ill-judged one-night stand. 

Why Are Men More Likely to Pursue Extramarital Sex?

Long-term marriages tend to suffer from a declining sex life. In fact, the vast majority of couples are only intimate a handful of times a week. According to some studies, around a quarter of married couples do the deed once a week. However, around 17% of married couples report getting intimate only once in any given month. 

Not everyone has an insatiable sexual appetite. Sometimes, however, both partners in a marriage aren’t going to feel the same way. If a man isn’t getting what he needs at home, pursue sexual partners elsewhere. It’s worth pointing out that this isn’t exclusively tied up in the need for sexual activity. If a married man is constantly refused sex by a spouse, feelings of rejection and inadequacy can fester. This compounds the issue, leading men to look for reaffirmation from extramarital partners. 

Why Do Married Women Cheat?

Why Do Married Women Cheat

Why do women cheatResearchers speculate that women pursue affairs for different reasons than men. Although some women are indeed chasing sex, others are looking to ignite emotional affairs with men. 

Many women feel disenchanted with their marriages, especially if they’ve been with a partner for many years. As husbands become distant and intimacy levels decline, it’s easy for women to feel unwanted and undesirable. People cheat for a variety of different reasons, but women tend to cheat because they’re actively looking to fill a void at the heart of their primary relationship. 

Ways Women Cheat

More married women than ever before are cheating on their husbands. While workplaces are a breeding ground for infidelity, the increase in dating apps and social media channels has made it easier for women to connect with emotionally invested men. 

Although many women are looking for physical intimacy, affairs rarely stop with a one-night stand or purely sexual relationship. In fact, a lot of married women enter into an affair with the anticipation that it would be the end of the marriage

Underlying Issues That Can Lead to Affairs

Underlying Issues That Can Lead to Affairs

Most affairs start because one or both partners are losing interest in a marriage. However, a breakdown in communication or lack of passion isn’t always the main driving force behind the dissolution of a relationship. Research suggests several factors can have a role in one or both partners being driven to infidelity. 

Addictive Personalities

Many people suffer from addictive personalities. Generally speaking, this presents as substance abuse. In the United States, around 15 million adults admit to having an issue with alcohol. Many adults also lean on prescription medication and illicit drugs. What does this have to do with cheating? The less clear-headed someone is, the more likely they are to make poor decisions away from their marriage. When sober, someone might never entertain the idea of engaging in an affair. When they’re in the midst of a binge, there’s no moral compass guiding them. 

Childhood Experiences

Trauma experienced during childhood can cause all manner of issues down the line. Victims of childhood sexual abuse may have trouble with intimacy as adults. This doesn’t have to be the one cheating. Instead, an innocent partner who is resistant to physical intimacy may unconsciously encourage their spouse to look elsewhere for sexual gratification. 

Childhood trauma can also lead to a host of emotional development issues. This can make it difficult for men and women to establish and maintain healthy emotional relationships as adults. It can blur the line between what is and what isn’t acceptable. 

Further, adults who experienced infidelity secondhand during their childhood years may be more likely to cheat themselves. Some research indicates that children of unfaithful parents are twice as likely to pursue an affair themselves in adult life. 

Intimacy Disorders and Attachment Issues

Attachment disorders often present after difficult childhoods. This might be the result of an absent father or an overly protective mother. In later life, both men and women can develop unhealthy attachment styles that complicate their romantic relationships. 

If someone is exhibiting attachment avoidance, they’re likely to push their spouse away, increasing the odds of them looking for sex and emotional connections elsewhere. Furthermore, those with deep-rooted insecurities may choose to pursue affairs to bolster their ego and prove their self-esteem. These disorders can affect any age group and will remain a problem until they’re resolved via therapy

Psychological Disorders and Mental Health Issues

Those suffering from mental illness may be more likely to cheat. Bipolar sufferers suffering from manic episodes may be compelled toward more unpredictable behavior than usual. This could take the form of a drug or alcohol binge, but may also present as a one-night stand or short-term affair. 

Other personality disorders can also increase the odds of someone cheating. Sociopaths and those with narcissistic personalities are far more likely to cheat on their partners. In these cases, most affairs will be seen as acceptable in the eyes of the cheater. It’s all about entitlement, with little care for the impact of actions on spouses or children. 

What to Do When a Spouse Cheats

What to Do When a Spouse Cheats

In the United States, around half of all marriages end in divorce. According to some estimates, around 17% of divorce proceedings cite infidelity as being the key reason behind the end of a marriage. 

However, infidelity doesn’t always have to mean the end of a marriage. If you suspect your spouse is playing the field or you’ve unearthed strong evidence to suggest they definitely have been cheating, take a step back and consider your options. 

What Are They Really Trying to Say?

Sometimes, the partner doing the cheating isn’t actively trying to sabotage a relationship. In fact, they may be comfortable with the prospect of being caught out. Sometimes, they may be looking for an excuse to be kicked out of the house to speed along the breakup of a marriage. Other times, there may be underlying issues with the marriage itself that need to be worked on. 

If cheating has become an issue in your marriage, decide how you want to progress. If it’s time to cut your losses and move on to greener pastures, don’t be afraid to start divorce proceedings. If however, you feel like fighting for your marriage, take this as nothing more than a rock in the road. It’s time to set new boundaries, redefine dynamics, and carve out a fresh path forward. 

How to Cope with Being the Wronged Party

An affair coming to light isn’t fun for anyone. However, for the wronged party, it’s particularly devastating. Some partners react furiously to finding out they’ve been cheated on. Others sink into themselves and quietly take the blame for encouraging their partner to explore their options. While it’s fine to consider the role you might have played, never take on the responsibility of being the chief reason behind infidelity. 

For women, emotional infidelity is a major issue and it can be hard for a relationship to recover from a husband striking up a meaningful connection with other women. For men, emotional affairs aren’t typically a dealbreaker, although sexual infidelity can lead to significant issues down the line. 

No matter what your initial reaction is, understand that your feelings surrounding the situation will change over time. Most of the time, you’re not simply going to loosen up and forget about it. Niggling thoughts in the back of your mind can fester and turn into deep-set resentment. To nip this in the bud, it’s always a good idea to pursue relationship counseling as soon as possible if you wish to save your marriage. 

How Can You Move Forward

How Can You Move Forward

Beyond a few rare exceptions, infidelity should be seen as a sign that something is wrong with your marriage. However, a simple one-night stand doesn’t mean you have to say goodbye to a decade-long marriage. 

Before you decide to proceed with a divorce or commit to moving beyond the issue, it’s important to consider the root causes behind the cheating. Furthermore, you’ll need to consider whether you have the stomach to work out the kinks in your relationship and establish trust with your partner. 

For couples suffering in the wake of infidelity, trial separations can be worth considering. This way, the cheating partner gets to explore new entanglements with multiple partners, while the wronged partner doesn’t have to feel like they’re being constantly betrayed. In many cases, the cheater will realize they’ve been chasing superficial attachments and reevaluate their marriage for the better.

How to Get Over a Married Man

How to Get Over a Married Man

Getting involved with a married man is never a good idea. If you’re the other woman, you’ll never be able to enjoy the full benefits of a healthy relationship. Chances are, you’re already under-appreciated, with your married lover spending very little time with you. Being the other woman in a relationship can also damage your self esteem, leading to feelings of unworthiness. 

How to Get Over a Married Man

If a married guy is actively cheating on his spouse, they’re the root cause of any distress caused by an affair. However, that’s not to say you’re entirely without blame. If you’re carrying on a relationship with a married man, you’re contributing toward destructive and harmful behaviors that have unseen victims. You might not be thinking too much about his wife and children while you’re enjoying evenings out and romantic getaways, but you ought to feel at least some level of guilt.

With a few exceptions, affairs are toxic arrangements that will eventually leave a trail of devastation in their wake. Sometimes, we can’t help who we fall for, but if you’ve fallen head over heels for a married man, it’s best to cut your losses and back out as quickly as possible. 

Is the writing on the wall for your relationship with a married man? Have you, after much soul searching, decided now’s the time to cut your losses and break free? Read on for a handy guide on how to speed up the healing process and put yourself in a better position to force a strong relationship with someone worthy of you. 

Is it Time to End the Affair?

Is it Time to End the Affair

Very few of us who end up in an affair choose to be in one. Unless you’re lacking in human empathy, the thought of getting involved with someone with a wife or girlfriend at home won’t appeal. However, many women find themselves in exactly this predicament. Perhaps the guy in question didn’t reveal his marriage until long after you first hooked up. Maybe he suggested to you that his situation at home didn’t have a long-term future. 

Whatever the reason, by the time you find out he’s married, a painless break is usually out of the question. If you feel connected with him and think he’s the right person for you, the fact he has a wife and family at home is only a secondary concern. Does the thought of not being able to spend time with him fill you with dread? Can you not imagine a future without him? Many women convince themselves that the married guy they’ve fallen for is their best shot at a happy life. However, this is rarely the case. 

Unless he’s prepared to make a decision and commit to you completely, there’s no point in continuing a relationship with a married man. You’ll also be playing second fiddle to his primary relationship. What matters to you in a relationship? What’s the bare minimum you expect from a guy? You’re not going to get it from someone already involved with a full-time spouse. 

Taking the First Steps

Taking the First Steps

Wondering how to get over a married man? The first step is to commit to moving forward. If you’re going to be the one to call things off, you’ve got to put to bed any notion that there’s a future for the two of you. 

It’s not easy to put the brakes on an affair. Married men aren’t great long-term prospects, but they can still be engaging partners. Maybe the sex is great. Perhaps you’re guilty of loving the thrill of being someone’s piece on the side. Such women are likely to fall back on old habits or find it difficult to permanently let go. 

You have to be rational about walking away from a relationship with a married man. If you’ve been carrying on an affair successfully for many months, if not longer, he’s not going to want to say goodbye just yet. Why would he want to invest valuable time and money into a new woman when he can just play his cards right and convince you to stay? 

You’re cutting your losses because you want to secure an enriching relationship with a suitable man. Remember that, no matter how convincing a married guy might be when trying to convince you to continue your dalliance. 

Furthermore, commit to putting a lid on your relationship. Even if you’re the one to call time on things, you might find yourself wanting to make contact again in the future. Even though you’re the one to end the affair, unresolved feelings can fester and the urge to get in touch again can present itself. When these urges arise, you have to be strong enough to push them back down again. 

Block His Number

This is a smart move when ending any type of romantic relationship. It’s a good first step in avoiding the temptation to get in touch again. By removing his phone number from your contact list, you’ve created an instant barrier between you and him. Additionally, you’ll want to block that number before deleting it. Just because you don’t want to talk to him again, doesn’t mean he’s going to want to agree to radio silence. 

There’s always a chance he might use a new number to text or call you if he’s not getting through to you any other way. If this happens, don’t engage him. Avoiding sending a text to let me know you’re still not interested. Simply block the new number and stop thinking about him.  

Avoid Contacting Him via Social Media Platforms

Avoid Contacting Him via Social Media Platforms

Most of us use our social media accounts to stay in touch with friends and family. If you’ve been engaged in an affair with someone, you probably haven’t been making a show of things via social media platforms with your married partner. However, sometimes people having an affair are friends on Facebook or following each other on Twitter. If he’s in your social media contacts, delete him at the first opportunity. 

Most of us are guilty of checking in on the status of old flames on social media from time to time. If you’ve been involved with a married guy, this is something you definitely want to avoid. Photos can be a real trigger for people with unresolved feelings. If there’s any bad feeling still remaining, the sight of him playing happy families with his wife might urge you into doing something you’d instantly regret. What’s more, you might see him hooked up with another woman who’s not his wife. This can instantly induce feelings of jealousy and rage, encouraging you to let your actual partner know what she’s dealing with. 

You’re only going to make trouble for yourself if you fall into this trap. It can be hard to avoid typing someone’s name in a social media search bar, but you have to express restraint. If the married guy in question is currently in your social media contacts, delete and block them. If there’s a good chance they’ll use social media to stay in touch, consider removing your account entirely and creating a new one. 

Focus on Passion Projects and Hobbies

There’s nothing worse than an idle mind if you’re trying to get over a relationship. If there’s still the prospect of reconnecting with a married guy, having too much time on your hands is going to lead you to think about them and ponder whether or not you did the right thing in breaking things off. 

To avoid this situation, you should spend time on things that will keep you occupied. Have you let your passion projects and interest slide? Get back into them. If you have an unused gym membership card gathering dust in your purse, brush it off and start committing to a healthy-living routine. If you’ve always wanted to pursue a certain hobby, start doing some reading and invest the resources you’ll need. 

Rebuild Your Social Life

Rebuild Your Social Life

Understanding how to get over a married guy is the easy part. Often, it’s dealing with the fallout that is the problem. Many women who embark on affairs with married men find that their social lives take a pounding. There are several reasons for this. A married man might demand a considerable slice of your time, making it difficult to stay connected with friends. Furthermore, some of your friends may have taken issue with the fact you were cheating with someone and have cut off ties with you because of this. 

Now that your relationship with a married man is done and dusted, you have the perfect opportunity to build bridges with old friends and get your social life back on track. If you have fallen out with friends because of your entanglement with a married man, don’t be too surprised if you’re forced to eat some humble pie. 

You’ll almost certainly find yourself making a few apologies. However, if it was you who decided to step away, you shouldn’t have any trouble with this. It might not be possible to repair every damaged friendship, but don’t take this as a sign that you’re unworthy of friends. If you’re committed to exploring new opportunities and are actively getting out there and enjoying yourself, you’ll quickly be embraced by new social circles and friendship groups. 

Don’t Be Afraid to Start Dating Again

Don't Be Afraid to Start Dating Again

Moving on from a relationship with a married guy can be tough. One of the lasting impacts of being involved in an affair is that it’s hard to strike up new relationships with men. If you stand any chance of enjoying a healthy and fruitful relationship in the future, you should only be targeting a suitable man who isn’t currently involved with anyone else. However, bad habits learned from your previous relationship can have lingering effects. 

Remember, you don’t have to creep around and be secretive now that you’re seeing an unattached guy. You’re the only person they’re looking to spend time with in a romantic sense and you should be considering them the same way. 

If you’ve spent months or years sneaking around and making discreet visits to hotels, the perks of a regular relationship can seem overwhelming. Unless you’ve been completely upfront with your new beau about your past, they may be able to read your discomfort with your new arrangement. 

If you’re worried about how you’re presenting to your new boyfriend, don’t be afraid to take things slow. Small baby steps will allow you to acclimatize to the dating scene and the everyday expectation of a normal relationship. Once you’re ready to take things further, you’ll be in a much better headspace. 

Consider Getting Professional Help

Consider Getting Professional Help

Are you really struggling to say goodbye to a married man? This isn’t uncommon. If you’ve been the one to do the dumping, putting a relationship to bed is a little easier. However, those women who find themselves unceremoniously ditched by married men tend to have trouble dealing with the aftermath. 

First and foremost, remember that leaving a toxic relationship is a good thing. You’re now free to enjoy a multi-faceted relationship with someone who genuinely cares about you. What’s more, you’re not betraying anybody. 

That being said, it can be very tricky to let go of those feelings of rejection and abandonment. If you’ve been involved with someone for long enough, you may feel uncomfortable about pursuing new relationships. If you’ve become overly attached to a married guy, you may look to them for reassurance and affirmation. Lost friends because of your relationship with a married guy? In a worst-case scenario, you may struggle to find a willing ear so that you can talk about your feelings. 

If you’re really having a hard time dealing with the situation, it’s a good idea to consult a mental health professional. They’ll help you see things rationally, underlining why it’s a good thing that you’re now removed from a harmful relationship. Furthermore, they can teach you coping mechanisms to tackle unresolved emotions. 

Is Sexting Cheating?

Is Sexting Cheating

Is sexting cheating? In the age of smartphones and social media, the lines between innocent online banter and genuine infidelity have become blurred. In fact, many people now in a committed relationship will have met online via a dating app. Those relationships may have started with flirty exchanges and inboxes overflowing with explicit photographs. It’s no surprise then that many people have trouble separating what’s acceptable when texting someone who isn’t their partner. However, what isn’t acceptable is when those messages veer close to sexting behavior. 

What is Sexting?

How do we define sexting? This isn’t rocket science. If you’re sending sexually-loaded messages to someone else or firing off nude photos or video clips to someone else, you’re guilty of sexting. Not everyone is comfortable with these kinds of exchanges, but it’s par for the course in the digital age of today. 

However, it’s not something you should be doing if you’re currently attached and in a committed relationship. You may not plan on meeting up with your sexting target in real life, but these exchanges have the potential to evolve into online affairs. It’s an emotional betrayal, plain and simple. Get caught out, and you run the risk of putting the brakes on your relationship or ending a happy marriage. 

Navigating the Grey Area

Navigating the Grey Area

Just because you’re not pursuing a physical relationship with other women, doesn’t mean you’re not guilty of emotional infidelity. For many married couples, it’s this emotional betrayal that really throws a spanner in the works. In fact, many women will admit that they can forgive their partner engaging with physical sex with someone else. However, a secret exchange that’s been simmering away for some time is far harder to forgive. 

Men might dismiss sexting as a fairly innocent activity. Even if they’re sharing explicit photos and heated exchanges, the fact they haven’t actively pursued someone else for sex makes them feel as though they’re innocent of any wrongdoing. Although gender differences do come into play here, some women may have a more relaxed attitude toward sexting. If you’re confident that your other half is comfortable with you flirting with other people online, sexting isn’t a relationship-ending activity. 

Is Sexting Really Cheating?

Although sexting lacks physical contact, it can bear all the hallmarks of an intimate relationship. If you’re currently in a relationship, there’s a good chance you’ve engaged in sexting with your partner. For many couples, filthy exchanges and the sharing of erotic photos are part of the courtship ritual. 

Is Sexting Cheating? 

Once you’ve committed to somebody else, sexting with someone else is definitely something you should avoid. Being committed to someone and enjoying a fully-fledged physical relationship with them doesn’t instantly qualify sexting as harmless fun. 

You might not be entertaining the idea of meeting up with your sexting partner in person, but your other half doesn’t know that. Any intimate connection, be it physical or virtual, is a risk factor in any relationship. 

It All Depends on Who You’re Asking

It All Depends on Who You're Asking

As with casual flirting in everyday life, many men and women consider sexting as harmless fun. However, the secretive nature of sexting complicates matters. If you’re currently involved in a long-term relationship and sexting with someone else, you’re almost certainly not letting your spouse in on the action. If you’re keeping your digital devices locked down and your sexting activities a secret, you’re already guilty of committing low-level emotional infidelity. 

The person doing the sexting likely has a multitude of reasons to justify their actions. They might have a high sex drive and reason that occasional sexting satiates their appetites, without them having to physically act upon them. Others might be easily led. Perhaps you’ve been approached via direct message on social media. However, just because you didn’t start the back-and-forth, doesn’t make it okay that you’ve continued to volley messages back and forth. 

Sometimes, the stage of a relationship can factor into how acceptable sexting is considered. Is it still early days? If you’ve only been going steady for a few weeks or a couple of months, sexting is likely to be written off as nothing to worry about. If you’ve been committed to someone for years, however, sexting is a clear violation of trust. 

Can Sexting Lead to Affairs?

Historically, most affairs started between colleagues at the workplace. The gym is another breeding ground for infidelity. However, in recent years, social media has provided cheaters with another platform to sniff out sex partners. While some sexting is innocent enough, there’s always the potential for a steamy exchange to turn into something more serious. 

Can sexting derail your current relationship? There’s also the potential for a flirty exchange to turn into a full-blown online affair. To understand why let’s explore some factors that make sexting such an unhealthy phenomenon. 

It Promotes Unhealthy Sexual Fantasies

It Promotes Unhealthy Sexual Fantasies

There’s been a lot of chatter in recent years about how online pornography has skewed the perception of sex for younger people. Sexting plays into this somewhat. Those engaging in sexting regularly run the risk of skewing their perceptions about what constitutes a healthy sex life. Sexually-loaded texts and messages loaded with explicit content aren’t how most people talk in day-to-day life. However, if you’re engaging in enough of these conversations, it can make you reconsider your primary relationship and the current state of your sex life. 

If you have a regular sexting partner, there’s probably little room for small talk. When one person requests a nude picture, the other will quickly oblige. This kind of transaction doesn’t typically happen in long-term relationships. When was the last time you asked your partner to drop their top or record themselves performing an explicit act? You’ll have probably had to field several questions before getting the desired result if indeed you did at all. 

Sexting also runs the risk of altering perceptions about ourselves. With both parties pursuing sexual gratification, there’s rarely room for self-conscious thought. As such, it’s easy to become overly confident in our sexual prowess and abilities. This might lead you to consider pursuing sexual encounters in real life. Alternatively, you may struggle to understand why you’re not getting the same results from your partner in the bedroom. 

It Can Drive a Wedge Between You and Your Partner

If you’re sexting regularly, you’re probably distracting yourself from your primary relationship. Sexting can quickly become addictive, especially if you’re in contact with multiple people. All that time spent checking your inbox and finding stolen moments to send a message will have a huge impact on your regular relationship. 

If you’re using sexting as a way to fill a void in your current relationship, it’s a surefire way of driving a deeper wedge between you and your other half. Furthermore, if you’re sexting to compensate for something else, you’re more likely to act on the urge to cheat in real life. 

Sexting isn’t good for anyone’s mental health. For the offender, it can blur the boundaries between what’s acceptable and what isn’t. For the victim, it can cause huge mental health issues and lead to feelings of inadequacy. If your relationship is at a crossroads and needs work, it’s time to talk the issue through. You don’t need to invest in marriage counseling or relationship guidance, but you definitely need to sit down and discuss what’s working and what isn’t. 

Repeat Offenders Will Get Caught Out

Repeat Offenders Will Get Caught Out

Think you can get away with sexting indefinitely? Unless you’re an expert in espionage tactics, you can’t. Spouses are often suspicious of contact texting and secretive phone calls. What’s more, many people see nothing wrong in asking to see the contents of their spouse’s phone. 

If red flags are raised elsewhere, don’t be too surprised if your partner is focusing more on what you’re doing with your digital devices. Keeping your smartphone close by will only go so far in keeping your virtual dalliances private. If your other half is particularly suspicious, there are all manner of ways they can delve into your virtual private life. 

They could use a monitoring app to see exactly what you’re up to. Alternatively, if your passcodes aren’t exactly bulletproof, they can easily log into your device when you’re not around. If you’re eager to keep your sexting activity a complete secret, you’ll need to be cautious about any interaction they have with your device, especially if you’re using online dating sites

Look out for supposedly innocent requests to use your phone. Maybe they want to use your smartphone to deliver takeout. Maybe they’re claiming to need a number for a mutual acquaintance. If you must keep up with sexting, a burner phone they have no knowledge about is the only guaranteed way of keeping your activities a complete secret. Even then, you’ll need to find reasons to excuse yourself so you can use this device without drawing attention. 

It’s Not Always Innocent

Just because you consider sexting innocent and unlikely to go anywhere, don’t assume the person you’re messaging feels the same. Is the target of your texts becoming too attached? Sexually-charged texts can quickly boil over into something more serious. 

If you’re currently in a relationship, it’s easy to compartmentalize sexting. You might get a cheap thrill from someone sending you naked photos, but you’re unlikely to consider this a prelude to a full-blown sexual affair. However, if you’re messaging a single person, any response they get might come across as being more loaded than you intended. 

Ultimately, you can’t count on the other person becoming more emotionally attached than you are. If they’re putting a lot of stock in your exchanges, you put yourself in a precarious position. If you don’t want to take things to the next level or attempt to step back from communicating with them, things can get nasty. 

It Can End a Relationship

It Can End a Relationship

Even if your partner never suspects that you’re sexting, there are other ways your activities can come to light. You could find yourself being blackmailed by the person you’re talking to. You might have put a lot of effort into concealing your antics from your spouse, but your personal details will be easy enough to source online. If you’ve given your name and revealed a few snippets of personal information, a wronged party will have no trouble sniffing out your social media profile. 

Furthermore, your photos could become compromised. Many celebrities have fallen foul of nude photo leaks and the general population isn’t immune to such cyberattacks. Admittedly, it’s unlikely that your other half will stumble upon these photos, but you still don’t want this kind of content ending up in the public sphere. 

Can Couples Move Past a Sexting Scandal?

Generally speaking, most couples can move on from a sexting revelation. If the guilty partner owns up to their behavior and accepts what they did was wrong, both sides can put their best foot forward and work on mending their relationship. If you’ve been sexting to compensate for a lack of passion at home, post-scandal conversations can also be used to carve out a better, healthier relationship. 

Obviously, this doesn’t apply if you’ve allowed sexting to turn into something more serious. While it’s tempting to give into your urges and meet a sexting partner in real life, remember that actual intimacy isn’t going to rival the level of conversation you’ve been having up until that point. It’s easy to talk dirty and look your best with a well-posed and perfectly filtered photograph, but the reality of casual sex is something else entirely. 

If you’re feeling the urge to cheat, there’s probably something profoundly wrong with your relationship. If you don’t see a long-term future with your partner, now’s the time to take stock and, if needed, take a step back. Think about your options and consider negotiating terms. Your other half might feel the same way, leaving you both free to pursue other options.

13 Signs a Female Coworker Likes You But is Hiding It

Signs a Female Coworker Likes You But is Hiding It

A significant number of affairs start in the workplace. In fact, according to some studies, as many as 30% of relationships begin life as office romances. Workplace flings can often cause issues for married people and those in committed relationships. As many as 85% of affairs start life in the office.

Signs a Female Coworker Likes You But is Hiding It

Office romances aren’t always ideal, but if you struggle to get out and mingle with the opposite sex, they’re a great place to meet interested women. However, they’re a little more complicated than everyday relationships. Arguably the most difficult part of an office romance is working out whether or not a female coworker likes you or not. You might think you’re a body language expert, but you probably know how to look for the most obvious signs that’ someone’s interested in you.

Deciding whether or not a female coworker is interested in you is difficult. Obviously, working out whether she’s interested or not is essential if you want to pursue a relationship. However, you also need to know whether you’re misreading innocent behavior as something else. Make the wrong move and you run the risk of landing yourself in hot water with HR and becoming the focus of office gossip.

Is She Interested?

Is She Interested?

Do you have your eye on a female colleague or think you might be the target of her affection? Don’t be too surprised if there’s a genuine attraction simmering away. People spend more time with their coworkers than they do with their friends and family. During busy spells, the camaraderie you establish with colleagues can cement relationships. As you spend time with colleagues, you share intimate details and talk about interests and passions. All this conversation can stoke the fires of romance, providing the perfect foundation for a relationship.

Wondering whether you’re dealing with a genuine spark? If she’s asking you personal questions and going out of her way to spend time with you, take this as a good sign. However, there are far more subtle signs that will help you determine whether or not she’s romantically interested in you, or simply being friendly.

Obvious Signs a Female Coworker is Interested

Obvious Signs a Female Coworker is Interested

No two women are the same, so identifying signs a female coworker likes you but is hiding it can prove a challenge. However, most women interested in pursuing a relationship with you are going to be leaning on the same behaviors. Need some help identifying those telltale signs? Read on for our guide on what you need to watch out for and how to deal with it.

She’s Asking Questions About Your Personal Life

Let’s start with one of the most obvious signs that a female colleague is looking to take things further. Is she asking you about your home life? Have you been asked questions about your relationship status? Sometimes, these questions are innocent enough. If you’ve been thrown together to work on a new account or complete a project, she may just be trying to break the ice.

Women are more likely to make friendships in the office, so you may just be dealing with innocent pleasantries. However, there are a few signals you can look for to determine whether she’s sniffing around for more detailed insights.

Is she being coy when asking about your home life? If she doesn’t outright ask you if you’re involved with someone, she probably doesn’t want to look like she’s fishing for information. If she’s keeping her guard up, it could be an indication that she’s scoping you out.

These questions can keep on coming, long after you’ve made it clear you’re involved with someone outside of the office. If she’s particularly keen, she may be looking for fault lines that can be exposed and exploited. If you’re up for indulging in an office romance, this shouldn’t be a problem. However, if you’re happy enough at home and want to keep unwanted attention at bay, look out for these probing questions.

She’s Finding Excuses to Work With You

If someone is going out of their way to spend more time with you, there’s a strong chance they’re romantically or sexually interested in you. This sign is easier to spot in certain workplaces. If you’re based in a co-working space and regularly need to collaborate with other people, she might make an effort to be placed on your team. She might suggest you work together on special projects.

Again, make sure you’re not dealing with innocent attention. It may be the case that she values your professional expertise and wants your input on a specific assignment. You’ll know soon enough what her intentions are once you start working together. If you quickly veer from briefs and the work requirement isn’t there, you’re almost certainly dealing with someone who has made an effort to steal time with you.

If you’re employed in a business where coworking isn’t the standard, this kind of behavior is far easier to spot. In fact, it can be very obvious. You need to be wary about how other colleagues are viewing this. If you’re currently involved and open to the idea of a workplace affair, just bear in mind that your colleagues are going to be observing these exchanges.

She’s Inviting You to Social Events

She's Inviting You to Social Events

This is another of the many signs a female coworker likes you but is hiding it. Female colleagues regularly use this as an excuse to spend time with a guy they’re interested in. By inviting a man to a shared social event, there’s less suspicion placed on them. What’s more, it’s a safe space and takes the action outside of the radius of office gossip.

Once again, you need to take a step back and determine whether a social invite is an innocent act or something more. Most colleagues socialize with each other during the week, especially during the holiday season, or to celebrate milestones at work. Have you been asked to attend leaving drinks for an outgoing employee? Don’t be too suspicious about this invite. Have you been asked to join a night out to celebrate the landing of a new account? There’s nothing untoward about this.

That being said, you might not realize anything strange is going on until you actually arrive at the social event. Just because she’s told you several people from the office are going, doesn’t mean they’ll actually turn up. If you arrive to find it’s just you and her, you’ve been duped. Likewise, if you’re arriving to find a group of people made up of strangers, she’s probably engineered the encounter to avoid office gossip.

If you’ve just joined a new company, receiving invites to social events is pretty typical. Don’t be too cautious when accepting these invites during your probationary period. You’ll quickly get a feel of the place and be able to read the vibe of the person doing the inviting.

She’s Sabotaging Your Interactions With Other Women

Now we’re entering red flag territory. You can read a lot into a woman’s intentions by the way she responds to your interactions with other female coworkers. Have you been receiving some side-eye action after talking to female colleagues who aren’t her? If you’re only dealing with someone with an innocent crush, you don’t have too much to worry about. However, if a female colleague is harboring deep feelings for you, just talking to another woman can cause huge problems for you in the office.

If you have a feeling someone has their eye on you and wants to pursue things with them, you can use your interactions with other women as a litmus test. Look out for stolen glances as you chat with a female colleague at the water cooler. If you spot more than a couple of these, there’s a strong chance she’s getting jealous about you spending even a slither time with the other members of the opposite sex.

However, you need to be careful when dealing with the jealous type. If your colleague is sitting on feelings for you and they haven’t been reciprocated, there’s always the chance she’s going to go out of her way to cause trouble. If she’s developing a complex about a particular woman you’ve been interacting with, she may go out of her way to make life difficult for them. If she’s talking trash about them to other people, it’s probably a ploy to drive a wedge between the two of you. A jealous colleague may also seek to sabotage work projects and assignments to reflect badly on you and the person she sees as competition.

She’s Letting Her Body Language Do the Talking

She's Letting Her Body Language Do the Talking

When it comes to body language, you have a lot to draw on when looking for signs a female coworker is interested in you. A simple smile could be a dead giveaway that a woman is interested in you, but is too shy to take the next step. That being said, sometimes a smile is just a smile. Is she flashing a grin at everyone she passes in the office? The chances are this is just a way of saying hello. However, if you’re the only one receiving the smile treatment, take it as a sign that she’s got her eyes set solely on you. If she’s nervous when smiling or saying hi to you, this is another good indicator that she’s sitting on romantic feelings.

A more confident colleague isn’t going to be shy about using more obvious body language to let you know how they feel. Physical contact is a clear sign that someone’s interested in you. During a conversation, there’s no real need for someone to go out of their way to make contact with you. A friendly pat or casual slap may find its way into an innocent exchange. At first glance, this seems meaningless, but if she’s itching to get to know you, these touches are loaded.

Take note of any accidental contact as well. Is she brushing up against you way too often? Does she always seem to be navigating those tight corridors when you’re in the vicinity? This could be an attempt to get close to you.

A little physical contact can be fun, but don’t get up in the thrill of this. If you don’t intend to pursue things with a colleague, you’re essentially leading them on for a cheap thrill. If they have it bad for you, those fleeting touches will mean a great deal to them. Let the pot simmer for long enough and you could be encouraging more erratic behavior down the line.

She’s Giving You Gifts

She's Giving You Gifts

It’s not unusual for colleagues to give each other little gifts from time to time. However, when you find surprises left on your desk you weren’t expecting, you could be entering crush territory. If a colleague is leaving you gifts a little too often, step back and consider the nature of your relationship. If you’re only casual acquaintances, there’s really no call for gift-giving unless it’s your birthday or you’ve had some bad news and you need cheering up. Even then, it’s unusual for someone you don’t really know to make the effort.

Sometimes, a colleague who has it bad for you will go out of their way to treat you without drawing too much attention to themselves. Keep your eyes peeled during the holiday season. Most workplaces will organize a Secret Santa exchange. If a woman has their eyes on you, they’ll do everything they can to pull your name from the lot.

It’s not just gifts you need to watch out for. Little notes and surprises can find their way onto your desk too. These might be innocent enough, but try and acknowledge them as quickly as possible. You don’t want to start some secretive exchange with the other person. If you want to make good on the relationship, just approach them. If things are making you uncomfortable, politely let them know you’re not interested or off the market.

She’s Dishing Out Too Many Compliments

Everyone loves hearing compliments aimed at them. However, most of us don’t pay too much thought to them beyond the immediate ego boost. For a coworker with a crush, however, compliments are a go-to tool in their arsenal.

Have you just paid a visit to the barber? The chances are high that you’ll get a few compliments on your new look when you’re next in the office. However, if one colleague goes out of her way to shower you with positivity, consider this a sign she’s interested in the whole package.

We all dish out compliments from time to time, but there’s a difference between a sincere compliment and a hollow one. Is a female coworker lauding you for something incredibly trivial? She’s probably going out of her way to find things to comment on. The reason for this? She wants you to know she notices you and appreciates you. If you’re interested, you shouldn’t be afraid of starting a volley. Firing back a compliment to her is a fuss-free way of letting her know you’ve got your eye on them too.

She’s Revealing Way Too Much Information

Once a coworker has managed to secure some alone time with you, they’ll probably start revealing information about their private life to you. Some women (and men for that matter) love to gossip. Make sure not just on the receiving end of chatter before deciding you’re being buttered up for a romantic entanglement.

If you’re spending time with a female colleague and they’re unpacking a lot of personal information, consider the contents before deciding whether or not you’re dealing with someone with a crush. Is she talking about family problems? This is probably innocent enough. Is she talking about vacation plans? Everybody does. However, if she’s waxing lyrical about how an ex-boyfriend messed her around in the past, she may be probing you to gauge your interest.

Of course, some women are far less reserved in the stuff they’ll come out with in conversation. If she has no inhibitions, she may start talking about intimate details, sexual preferences, and more. This kind of conversation isn’t always targeted, but it’s often a sign that someone is looking to pique your interest.

Sometimes, things are more complicated. A woman may simply be looking to make an emotional connection with someone. The fact that you’re a man is secondary to that. You could be dealing with something strictly platonic. However, these emotional connections can evolve into something more. Over time, those supportive conversations can blossom into a romantic interest. It’s often a healthy way for office romances to catch fire and these dynamics usually result in stronger relationships.

She’s Putting More Effort into Her Appearance

This sign is easier to spot than others, but it only usually becomes apparent once someone has started to take an interest in you. If you’ve recently been paired up with a female coworker and she’s started to dress differently, she may be going out of her way to make an impression.

Sometimes, a woman upping her fashion game has nothing to do with the opposite sex. If however, she’s investing a lot of effort into her appearance, it could be an indicator that she’s looking for compliments and wants you to notice her. It’s not just clothes that are a giveaway. She might be wearing a new fragrance or changing up her cosmetics.

A new look could be just that. She might also be getting dressed up to head to a social event after work. When in doubt, ask her if she’s got something planned that evening. If the answer is now, you could be looking at a clear sign that she likes you, but wants to let her looks do the talking.

She’s Done Her Homework

Does it seem like a coworker knows more about you than they should? If a woman has a romantic interest in you, she’s probably done her homework. Maybe she’s asked around the office about your background and interests. It’s also pretty easy for someone to jump online and browse social media platforms to get some information about you.

Most of us turn to Facebook to get a little more detail about someone we’re interested in. Most of the time, it’s innocent enough. However, if she’s become something of a cyberstalker, you should approach her with caution. This kind of background-checking behavior doesn’t always make for a healthy relationship. What’s more, if you’re not actually interested in them, you can feel like you’re under siege.

If you suspect that someone is using social media and online channels to discover insights about you, consider planting some false flags. You could even create a dummy profile and load it with content. If they’re looking you up online, they’re almost certain to drop something into the conversation to demonstrate that you have shared interests. If you want to take the bait, now’s the time to do it. Hopefully, they’ll navigate away from stalking you online and be more direct when it comes to getting to know you instead.

She’s Sending You Mixed Signals

Women are complicated creatures. Just because she’s got it bad, doesn’t mean she’s always going to be positive in her outlook toward you. One minute she could be showering you with compliments and sharing inside jokes, the next she’s frosty as a snowman and giving you the cold shoulder.

This kind of behavior isn’t just typical of a temperamental colleague. It should suggest that she’s besotted with you. People act crazy when they’re in a relationship and they can still bring emotional baggage to a one-sided one.

She might be quietly furious with you because you’ve not complimented her on a change in her appearance. Maybe she’s spent time getting clued up about something you’re interested in, only for you not to engage with her in conversation. Although you’ve not done anything wrong yourself, they could see it as a slight. Mixed signals are a staple of conventional relationships and, unfortunately, they’re par for the course when it comes to crushes as well.

Other People Are Taking Note

Other People Are Taking Note

You don’t have to be a relationship expert yourself to notice that someone in the workplace has their eye on you. If someone is into you that much, other people will notice this behavior as well. Has a work friend dropped a comment that someone has been acting strangely around you? Are other women in the office talking about a change in someone’s behavior? If you socialize with your coworkers, don’t dismiss these kinds of insights.

Is the Attraction Mutual?

Once you’ve determined that someone is interested in you, take a step back and consider what you want to do next. If you’re seeing someone else and don’t want to carry on an affair, it’s best to put the dampers on things. You have a couple of options here. The easiest way to bring things to a close is to quietly point out to your besotted coworker that you’re involved with someone else and not in a position to pursue a relationship with them. However, this won’t always go down well. They may accuse you of misreading the signals to save face. If they feel slighted enough, they may even take things up with HR to land you in hot water.

A safer option is to simply pull away from interactions with the coworker in question. Keep things strictly professional at times. This means dispensing with anything close to a compliment and avoiding social interactions with them outside of the workplace. It also means avoiding one-on-one interactions with them. Sometimes, you may be forced to work alongside the other person. If you can’t quietly request an alternative assignment, try and limit the time you spend with them as much as possible.

Interested in pursuing a romance with your married coworker? Some guys enjoy being chased and revel in the attention. While it can do your ego the world of good, the longer you let someone quietly crush on you, the more complicated things can become. It’s not the healthiest way to start a relationship. If you don’t formalize things quickly, you need to be wary of your general interactions with other colleagues. This means limiting the time you spend talking to female coworkers and managing your interactions with women in general. If you’re interested and the attraction is mutual, act on it.

Is an Office Romance a Good Idea?

Is an Office Romance a Good Idea?

Office romances are incredibly common. More than half of people report being open to the idea of a workplace romance, while more than a third of people have had a one-night stand with someone they work with. However, if you’re a committed professional, pursuing a relationship with a colleague might not be the best idea. It can disrupt your everyday working life, especially if you work within the same department.

What’s more, a breakup is going to really complicate matters. If the breakup is a messy one, you may find working life unbearable. Do you really want to transfer to another branch or pursue a brand new position entirely? Even if you remain with your employer, you can pretty much forget about pursuing office romances with other women in the future.

How Often Does A Married Man Think About His Mistress?

How Often Does A Married Man Think About His Mistress

It’s interesting to me that people still use the word mistress. Nowadays, it’s been replaced by the phrase affair partner. Maybe because there’s no word for a male mistress. But to save you time and energy to dig out the answer, I can tell you right now, it’s all the time. When I had a mistress/affair partner – I thought about her all the time.

How Often Does A Married Man Think About His Mistress

In fact I couldn’t stop thinking about her. There’s something about the forbidden that’s just so intoxicating. We used secret channels to communicate and I would be like a high school child, checking my phone all the time to see if she had replied.

Men cheat. Like all the time. We know this just by virtue of the fact that Ashley Madison has over 60 million users (undoubtedly millions of them are bots). That tells us so much. But for guys like me, we do our level best not to ever let our wife get suspicious.

Guys like me are totally selfish

We want our cake and we want to eat it too. Having a strong relationship with my wife is what gives me the confidence to go out and cheat (as counter intuitive as that sounds). But having a strong marriage and seeing other women is literally the definition of having your cake and eating it.

And in that journey of cheating, sometimes you’ll meet a woman that you become completely infatuated by, maybe even worse – you fall in love. Having strong feelings for other women that come into your life can be totally dangerous. Almost debilitating.

When affairs turn to love

I stupidly fell in love with my last affair partner. Head over heels in love with her. I never called her my mistress, but she was married as well but her husband, whilst a nice guy, was dull. What she wanted was some excitement in her life. And to her, the answer was me.

Like me she loved being married, but understood it was possible to develop feelings for someone else. And once things got serious between us, our relationship grew stronger and stronger. We were talking all the time and the affair was getting quite intense. She was constantly thinking about me and I was her.

Married Men Take Their Wives For Granted

Married Men Take Their Wives For Granted

It’s not uncommon that married men can take their wife for granted. And her husband was just like this. Their marriage was strong but he was taking her for granted a lot. There were quite a few signs that his behaviour was never going to change – and whilst she accepted it, she needed some sort of thrill.

Our feelings for each other grew to the point where we were completely in love.

And despite us talking all the time and constantly messaging each other throughout the day, like non stop, I still thought about her all the time.

Why Do Married Men Think About Their Affair Partners All The Time?

Married guys live pretty monotonous lives. Despite starting off their marriage being wildly in love, chances are ten years later, the feeling of in love has just been replaced by regular old love. And with kids, life and work – it’s a fair assumption to say they live pretty monotonous lives. I mean isn’t that true of most people?

The point about having an affair partner is that it’s exciting. It’s like having this secret that no one knows about and yet you want to shout about it from the rooftops. You want to show her picture to your closest of friends and watch them melt endlessly with jealousy.

You just can’t.

But this excitement is why so many of us have affairs. Being single and seeing multiple women just wouldn’t have the same buzz.

So to iterate on some of my points above, we think about our mistress all the time. We want to talk to them all the time, we want to be with them all the time, we just can’t get enough. I would liken it to having a crush on someone. There’s a certain level of infatuation that takes over.

My Current Affair Partner

I’ve recently started seeing someone new. She’s a journalist, she’s hilarious and I just can’t get enough. I’m completely besotted by her and at every opportunity I’m messaging her. She’s single (and knows I’m a married man) and typically answers my messages almost instantaneously. I’ll constantly look for excuses to carve out a few minutes, even when I’m home (fake visits to the toilet, etc..) – to just check in with her.

I’ll generally send one of my cheeky but charming messages:

I sensed you were thinking about me, just wanted to check in and say X

That’s it. Of course the sarcasm and irony comes through and gets an equally funny response:

What makes you believe I was thinking about you and not the pile of washing that I need to tend X

And on and on the banter would go, back and forth. Whether I’m at work, at the gym or sometimes at home, I can’t get her out of my head. I can’t stop myself thinking about her. I’m mentally planning our next date, the restaurant, the hotel, the cover-up – I’m figuring it all out.

The Real Question

There’s a strong possibility that given the title of this blog, logic would tell me that the 2 type of people who are reading this are:

i) someone having an affair and in the same boat as me, wildly think about his mistress

ii) a wife, someone who has either caught or suspects their husband is seeing someone else.

The Married Man Having An Affair

If you are having an affair and are wondering if it’s normal to be spending more time thinking about your mistress than your life – then I get it. Don’t worry. It’s totally normal.

I’ve been there. I am there right now. However I will say this, if you are thinking about your affair partner a lot, if and when you go through a breakup, I can tell you from experience, that this too will weigh on your mind and occupy your thoughts for a long while.

It works both ways. And if you’re foolish enough to fall in love with her, then that breakup is going to be even harder to deal with.

Wife Reading

Wife Reading

If you are a wife reading this post – as sad and hard as this is to understand, thinking about one’s mistress is normal. It’s normal for him to think about his mistress. You can’t legislate his thoughts. If you’re sure he’s seeing someone else, then address the bigger problem. Get help, see a therapist and deal with the matter head on.

First World Married Man Problems

I like attention. It’s pathetic but true. I need it, I crave it and quite often I shower my affair partners with attention like they’ve never had. And why? Not because I love doing it, thought I’m great at it, but because some twisted part of me feels that by giving so much, I’ll start to get some back.

Having an affair is going to lead you down a rollercoaster of emotions. You’ll feel things that you haven’t felt in years. From butterflies in your stomach to being reminded of what heartbreak feels like. So as I always say, do meditation. Learn to manage your state as best as you can, if not – you’re going to get caught out.

And as a married man having affairs, I spend as much effort in having an affair as I do in making sure that affair doesn’t get discovered.

Conclusion

I wish there was an answer. The right answer. That would stop you letting your imagination run away with you, but I don’t. In fact I’ve told you quite the opposite. And that is if you are a married man having these thoughts, it’s ok. It’s normal.

The truth is when you think about how often does a married man think about his mistress, the actual question should be, when doesn’t a married man think about his affair partner. A married man can’t help himself.

Having An Affair; The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

Having An Affair

I’ve cheated a lot over the years and have been successful in getting away with it. I’ve become an expert at knowing how to find women to cheat with, what to say to get out of the house, best places to cheat at and of course how to not get discovered.

It’s no surprise why the Metro Newspaper had me write an opinion piece on all their celebrity cheating stories.

Different Types Of Cheating

Different Types Of Cheating

But there’s so many different types of cheating. Not all cheating is physical. Some can be emotional, some micro, others can be one night stands, office flings, texting an old-ex and everything in between.

All of which I’ve tried. However, I’ve come to appreciate that for me, the best form of cheating is having an affair, and ideally with someone who is married (this way they have as much to lose as I do).

Affairs Are The Pinnacle Of Cheating

Affairs Are The Pinnacle Of Cheating

There’s something about that girlfriend experience that beats all the other forms of cheating. And whilst it is deep and more emotionally involved, there’s a level of maturity to an affair that a one night stand just doesn’t have.

The right affair partner can really be a wonderful addition to your life and if you’re the type of person who likes to get involved in an extramarital affair, trust me when I say that affairs beat all of the above.

My Chat With A Relationship Coach

Just the other night I was out with a friend of mine who is a relationship coach. Now he would be mortified if he found out that I was a serial cheater let alone doing dating coaching to married men, simply mortified. And the topic of infidelity came up.

He turned red.

Hearing patients who have been cheated on, day in day out, had really taken its toll on him. He went on to tell me that the worst type of cheating was the affair. He explained that in his experience, a wife could forgive an office fling or a drunken one night stand; but what they can never get over is the betrayal of an affair. Not because of the sex, no, because of the emotional cheating. That emotional connection with another woman, that emotional intimacy, would break her more than knowing you were in bed together.

Emotional Infidelity

Whilst we have talked about this and micro cheating in past blogs, there’s something for me that’s very profound about being emotionally connected with an affair partner. It makes the relationship better and it sure as hell makes the sex better. And let’s be honest here, it’s nice to actually have deep and meaningful chats with a beautiful woman without her reminding you when to pick up the kids or to take the trash out.

There’s many reasons why men cheat, but married men who have affairs have been known to hook up with whomever is the lowest hanging fruit – which is why office romances and trysts are rampant. Most of them never get to have full blown affairs.

What I Learnt About Myself

What I Learnt About Myself

There’s 2 huge things I learnt about myself over the last 10 years:

1) I prefer affairs over all other forms of cheating. By a long shot.

2) It’s so much easier to say to your affair partner that you’re married, and if they are too they’ll get it. They’ll respect the time you need to spend with your family without getting jealous and will know their place in your life automatically. Just as I know my place in their world.

3) There’s a maturity to it all which you can’t put into words, but I now understand more than ever why so many French Politicians have full time mistresses. Many of whom have told their wife; which is perhaps one step too far for me.

Advantages Of Having Affairs

1) They know the score. You’re married, they’re married – everyone has to keep their mouths shut.

2) Given she knows you’re married too, she’s never going to show up to your house and turn your life upside down.

3) It’s like dating and having a girlfriend all over. It’s exciting.

4) The conversations are much deeper.

5) The sex is so much better.

6) There’s no nagging.

7) They’re less needy.

The Disadvantages Of Affairs

1) It can get too emotional. Affairs can turn to love so quickly, sneak up on you and bite you in the ass before you even realise.

2) The breakups are brutal.

3) It’s hard to replace a great affair partner.

Discovering Affairs

Discovering Affairs

In the early days, when I was on the hunt for a cheating partner, anyone would do. Beggars can’t be choosers. I’m married, I have kids – I needed to just take what I could get. In those days, these were mostly flings and one night stands.

And yes, they were great. Like super great. I’m hardly complaining that I had sex with a bunch of hot women – no sir.

But they were emotionless, robotic and had short lived. My sex life would thank them, but not my brain. These meaningless relationships (if you could even call them that) just weren’t aligned with my personality.

I love learning from people and once they’re out of your life within a week (or sometimes 24hrs) – it’s hard to build that relationship into that.

My Last Affair

My last affair was amazing. She was a doctor, drop dead stunning, intelligent and I loved her to pieces. I truly loved her with all of my heart. She was the first affair partner I ever had that made me consider leaving my wife. We would debate against one another, share common interests, laugh together and learn together. I would encourage her with some of her projects and she would support me in the things I was doing.

We were perfect partners.

And of course like any relationship, we would also argue and stop talking to each other for days. Yet somehow, we managed to get past all of that and would always run back to each other. Sometimes in the moments we weren’t talking, we’d see it as a sign to reflect and wonder whether or not what we were doing was right. Often our fights would serve as a red flag, to the cheating. The bold faced cheating.

The Beginning Of The End

The Beginning Of The End

Sadly, one day, she started to pull back a little. I was the first person she’d ever had an affair with and I could just sense something strange was happening. She’d read messages and not reply, she’d call me less, our calls were shorter and lacking in romance. It was clear that this was the beginning of the end. Our arguing increased and I was struggling to deal with the new reality.

I kept asking her if this was over, but I knew it was heading that way. She was feeling more and more guilty each day and was struggling to look her own children in the eye. She’d also stopped having orgasms whilst having sex with her own husband. It was going to be obvious soon if it wasn’t already that she was up to something. There was simply no point in continuing.

We ended it. Badly.

We don’t talk. Which is a shame but also a blessing. There was going to be no happy ending to this situation. And as much as I find myself sometimes feeling anger towards her for pulling back, for distancing from me – I remind myself of how much good came from being together. How amazing the good times truly were, how much I learnt, how much I felt love and being loved again. She was the best affair partner I’d ever have and I’d do anything to have that back again.

But sadly, it is true, sometimes good things do come to an end and not everything lasts forever. What we had, when we had it was the best. The possibility of it ever happening again are less than zero and even knowing that is a blessing.

Since Then

Since then I’ve had a string of flings and one night stands. But none of them have even come close to having an affair.

Despite the breakup and the gut wrenching pain that surrounds it, I’m still standing here saying affairs are the best form of cheating. Especially when you have the right affair partner.

The Right Affair Partner

The Right Affair Partner

The right affair partner is almost like having the perfect girlfriend. They boost your confidence and they truly are there for you every step of the way. I’ve heard of some affairs lasting for years and years, and after having had quite a few affairs, I can actually see how that’s possible.

People assume that people like me cheat just for the sex. That we simply aren’t getting it at home and so we go out hunting. That’s a completely unfair assumption.

The actual truth is many of us cheat because there’s something about getting that attention exclusively from someone that is absolutely so undeniably addictive.

Warning About Affairs

If you’re the type of person that already cheats but is just in it for the sex, then this article really isn’t for you. But if you are looking to take your cheating to the next level, then you are 100% my target audience.

But be warned. I’ve had 2 amazing affairs in the last 3 years. They were truly incredible. Like going out with my first ever girlfriend incredible. However, with all that happiness, when it all goes wrong, the breakups are just awful. And it will feel like someone has ripped your heart out off your chest and shattered it into a million little pieces.

Now you may think it’s worth it; thinking that going through that pain is worth having the amazing feeling that an affair brings. And for people like me it’s definitely worth it and been worth it – every time.

But what you have to ask yourself is this, whilst going through a breakup, are you still able to go home and act normal around your wife and kids without attracting attention? Now I wish I had a tip, trick or strategy to making that part easier – but I’m also lost here.

For me, the end of every affair is emotionally draining, yet somehow, I have to go home and play the happy husband and dad, because if I don’t, it’s going to be obvious. As if breakups aren’t hard enough. And remember you can’t share it with anyone (other than maybe a therapist), which I’ve never done. But you can’t tell your friends, you can’t tell your work mates, and of course you can NEVER tell your wife.

You simply suffer in silence.

Are You Ready For An Affair?

If you think you are ready for having an affair, be sure to play it all the way through in your mind. Of course it’s like being on cloud nine. But at some point even the best affairs end, and do so abruptly and badly.

And when I look back at my last 2 affair partners, what I miss the most, more than the chats and the sex and the laughter, is the emotional intimacy.

I didn’t know what to expect when I started down the sexual affairs route. I used to love my flings. I thought my future would be flings and one night stands only. And whilst that did happen often, they were unfulfilling. No one prepared me for what a life of emotional affairs and intimacy would look or feel like.

No one warned me that feelings would even be involved. That people would get hurt.

My Advice About Having Affairs

My Advice About Having Affairs

So here is my advice, if you ever consider having an affair, please read this post again. Please take into account the pitfalls as well as the highs. Committed relationships with an affair partner isn’t always for everyone. When looking outside your marriage, some people like variety and a primary relationship with just one person may not even be appealing.

However in real life, it’s easy to get sucked into an affair. It can make you reckless and arrogant and lead to suspicious behavior and raise suspicions at home.

My gut feeling has always been the thing that I follow in my life. And whilst I’ve always had plenty of short term flings, that’s never really done it for me. I’ve never really wanted to make more effort with someone I had a one night stand with, but for the perfect affair partner I’d go to the ends of the earth.

It’s a beautiful thing and if you’re ever lucky enough to find someone that gives you all the things that are missing from you life and fills you with happiness and makes you want to spend time with them, like all the time – then by all means, go for it. Just be careful. And know, after it’s all over, it’s hard.

Best Hotels In London To Have An Affair

Best Hotels In London To Have Sex With Your Affair Partner

Having an affair is hard work. If you’re tired of sneaking away for last-minute encounters, it’s high time to consider scheduling a dirty weekend with your affair partner. Once you’ve locked down your alibi and freed up your schedule, it’s time to start thinking about accommodation options.

Thinking about a stay in London?

The UK capital is the perfect venue for solo vacations, let alone a dirty weekend. There’s also no shortage of five-star hotels that cater to every crowd. Need some help finding the best hotel in London for a sex-filled stay? We’ve got you covered. Read on for our roundup of the best London hotels. You’ll find everything from room options and starting rates to spa facilities and optional extras.

Best Hotels In London To Have An Affair

Shangri-La The Shard

Shangri-La The Shard

Not afraid of spending some serious money? Shangri-La The Shard is one of London’s most exclusive hotel destinations. This five-star hotel takes up no less than 18 floors of The Shard, the tallest building in the UK and one of the largest skyscrapers in all of Europe. If you’re looking for stunning views and unadulterated luxury, there’s no better venue for your next dirty weekend or last-minute overnighter.

Room Details

Currently, Shangri-La The Shard boasts more than 200 rooms, although you’ll need a healthy budget to secure a booking here. As luxury is the order of the day here, there’s no such thing as a basic room at Shangri-La The Shard. In fact, the cheapest overnight stays will set you back around £350. If you want to upgrade to more premium accommodations, expect to pay double that.

When it comes to decor and finishing touches, every room at this hotel will impress. Even basic rooms are equipped with body-contouring beds. These are great for sleeping, but they’ll also serve you well if you’re booking a stay for a sex-filled weekend.

Most rooms also benefit from south-facing views of the London skyline. As this hotel is built into a skyscraper, full-length windows are standard. Bathroom facilities will also impress. Each bathroom is furnished in premium marble, with heated floors for maximum comfort and walk-in rain showers on hand when you need to cool off after a heated session beneath the sheets.

If you don’t plan on leaving your room during your stay, there are plenty of other amenities to keep you occupied. Each guest room is equipped with a 40-inch television, while you’ll also find a 19-inch television in the bathroom. High-speed WiFi access comes as standard, while there’s a Nespresso coffee machine if you require a caffeine kick.

Spa Facilities and Premium Experiences

Shangri-La The Shard has plenty of on-site facilities to keep you occupied during your stay. If you can bear to tear yourself away from the bed for an hour or two, head to the iconic Sky Pool. This legendary infinity pool is located on the 52nd floor of The Shard, offering unparalleled views of the capital.

There’s also no shortage of spa facilities here. You’ll find a full menu of treatments available if you’re out to impress your partner. If you don’t feel like venturing out, in-room spa treatments can be scheduled ahead of time. Meanwhile, there’s a fully equipped gym on hand if you’re booking in for a longer stay and need to keep on top of a training regimen.

This hotel also boasts three on-site restaurants, as well as one of the finest bars in London. In the mood for a nightcap? GŎNG is advertised as the highest bar in all of Europe. The bar menu is a little pricey, but it’s a small premium to pay for such spectacular views. Looking for a light lunch or late-night snack? The Sky Lounge is the place to be on Friday and Saturday evenings.

Room Service and Extras

If you’re planning a long-overdue dirty weekend, chances are you want to leave your room during your stay. Thankfully, Shangri-La The Shard offers 24-hour room service with a full menu to take advantage of.

All the other service extras you’d expect from a five-star hotel can be found here. If you’re visiting from further afield, there’s a foreign exchange counter to hand. If you’re spending more on a suite, go the extra mile and advance book butler service. For longer stays, there are also laundry and valet services.

Location

Shangri-La The Shard is located in the heart of London’s Southwark district. If you’re unfamiliar with the UK capital, this puts you on the south bank of the River Thames. If you want to get out and explore, London Bridge Underground Station is only a few minutes away on foot. From here, you can reach destinations like Covent Garden, Soho, and Westminster within 10 minutes.

The Hoxton Holborn

The Hoxton Holborn

Looking to make a last-minute booking for a quick getaway? The Hoxton Holborn is the way to go. Nowadays, not many establishments cater to the cheating crowd, but The Hoxton Holborn bucks the trend. You can of course book an overnight stay or longer stretch here, but if you’re after somewhere to play host to a daytime encounter, the good folks here will happily provide.

Room Details

Although it doesn’t hold a candle to places like Shangri-La The Strand, The Hoxton Holborn won’t disappoint with its design and room offerings. As it’s built into a former telephone exchange, don’t expect uniform rooms as the standard here. Instead, there’s a wide variety of basic bedrooms and grander suites to choose from.

If you’re simply looking for somewhere to check in, undress, and get down to business, go with a Shoebox room. Although compact, each of these rooms is furnished with a double bed that’s more than big enough for steamy sex sessions. These rooms are also your cheapest option, with overnight rates starting at around £160.

If you want to go with something a bit larger, you’ve got Snug, Cozy, and Cozy Up rooms to choose from. Although you’ll benefit from more square footage, the basic amenities are the same as what you’ll get with a Shoebox room. Ultimately, you’ll have to ask yourself whether a marked price difference is worth a bit more breathing room.

Do you have more money to play with? The Hoxton Holborn offers ‘Roomy’ and ‘Biggy’ accommodation options. As well as more square footage, you’ll benefit from a King bed that’ll come in handy once the clothes come off.

Spa Facilities and Premium Experiences

Planning a longer stay? Unfortunately, The Hoxton Holborn isn’t brimming with premium facilities and spa options. If you’re looking for in-house treatments and five-star service, you won’t find what you’re after here. However, if your main goal is to get your end away, this shouldn’t be too much of a problem.

The good news is that The Hoxton offers a couple of decent dining options. Ready to come up from underneath the sheets for a spot of lunch? Book a table at Rondo and experience brilliant bistro dining and an epic wine list. There’s also La Cave, a pop-up wine bar that’s perfect for a last-minute nightcap.

Room Service and Extras

If you can’t face kicking back the sheets and getting out of bed, there’s a decent enough room service menu to take advantage of. Unlike other hotels, The Hoxton only offers room service between the hours of 7 am and 10.30 pm. However, you can pre-order a light breakfast for as little as £4.

There aren’t many on-site facilities to choose from here. That being said, you’re in a prime location in one of the biggest cities in the world. If you’re looking for five-star spa treatments or gym facilities, head to the front desk for some recommendations.

The Hoxton Holborn also has an on-site shop selling a selection of alcoholic drinks and snacks. The good news isn’t any huge markup to worry about. You’ll be paying pretty reasonable prices, saving you a small fortune on room service and mini bar bills.

Location

Situated in the heart of London, The Hoxton Holborn is just the ticket if you want to be within walking distance of bustling neighborhoods like Covent Garden and the iconic West End district. Technically, this hotel is classed as part of Shoreditch, one of the trendier corners of the capital. You won’t need to travel far to find trendy bars or nighttime attractions when staying here. However, if you do want to travel further afield, you’re within walking distance of Holborn Underground Station.

Karma Sanctum Soho

Karma Sanctum Soho

Some hotels are designed with romantic getaways in mind. Others put the focus squarely on sex and kink. Karma Sanctum Soho falls into the latter camp. This stylish hotel makes an instant impression. It’s effortlessly cool, with retro-inspired interiors and decorative touches lifted right out of the 1970s. If you’re after a good time, there are few better hotels in the UK capital.

Room Details

There are a lot of room options at Karma Sanctum Hotel. If you’re on a budget, it’s best to stick with a Compact Room. Admittedly, these basic rooms are lacking when it comes to square footage, but even these compact accommodations boast a King size bed. You’ve also got premium Egyptian cotton sheets and a first-rate bathroom at your disposal. Karma Sanctum Soho isn’t the cheapest of hotels, but book in advance and you should be able to secure an overnight stay for as little as £180.

Thinking about upgrading? A Superior Compact Room is the way to go. This room option provides you with all the amenities of a basic Compact, but you’ll benefit from more square footage. If you’re planning a dirty weekend, it’s best to spend a little more on one of these larger rooms.

If you plan on doing little else but having sex during your stay, it’s worth upgrading to a Superior or Deluxe Double room. Not only are these rooms larger than compact alternatives, but you also get a Super King four-poster bed. Prepared to spend more on your stay? Karma Sanctum Hotel offers no less than four suite options. If money is no object, think about going all out and booking a Loft Suite. Standout features include freestanding bathtubs, allowing you to get a little creative if you want to take the action away from the bed. What’s more, you’ll also benefit from a private entrance to the hotel roof terrace and bar.

Spa Facilities and Premium Experiences

Although this hotel doesn’t offer much in the way of spa experiences, there are excellent dining options here. Wild Heart Bar & Shokudo offers Japanese-inspired cuisine around the clock. In London, you’re exactly short on dining venues, but it’s great to have access to a five-star menu without having to stray too far from your room. What’s more, there’s a regular afternoon tea service to look forward to, with Michelin-starred chefs cooking up a storm in the kitchen.

Although Karma Sanctum Soho offers incredible dining, you’ll need to check to see what’s being served on any given day. You can enjoy the breakfast menu any day of the week, while the lunch menu can be savored every day bar Monday. Dinner options are more limited. Currently, you’ll only be able to enjoy dinner if you’re staying Wednesday through Saturday. Thankfully, the on-site hotel bar can be enjoyed any day of the week, except Sunday. However, when the bar is open, it’s open 24 hours a day. What’s more, the outdoor terrace is equipped with a bubbling jacuzzi. Perfect if you’re looking to get the party started early.

Room Service and Extras

There’s a lot to love about this hotel. However, if your time away is limited and sex is the only thing you’re interested in, you’re probably going to lean heavily on room service. The room service menu at Karma Sanctum Soho isn’t too exhaustive, but there’s more than enough on offer to keep you going until you’re ready to checkout. However, bear in mind that room service isn’t offered around the clock. You can order in from 7 am, right up until midnight. If you plan on getting up to late-night antics, it’s worth getting your room service orders early.

Location

As the name suggests, Karma Sanctum Soho is located in the heart of Soho. This is one of London’s livelier regions and is within walking distance of the West End district. If you want to get out and explore during your stay, the nearby Piccadilly Circus Underground Station is located a short walk away. From here, you’ll be able to reach iconic landmarks and must-see attractions within 20 minutes.

The Marylebone Hotel

The Marylebone Hotel

The Marylebone Hotel is one of London’s most romantic destinations. Although you’ll rub shoulders with plenty of honeymooning guests, it’s also a popular spot for dirty weekends. If you’re looking for somewhere that goes the extra mile, there are few better hotel options in London.

Room Details

There are a lot of room and suite options at The Marylebone Hotel. However, if you’re checking in for a weekend of sex, you’ll want to rule out classic twins or compact rooms geared toward the unassuming overnighter.

The Marylebone Hotel isn’t cheap. In fact, it’s one of the priciest venues in central London. A Classic Room will set you back around £415 per night, although you may be able to make a saving if you book early enough. Although expensive, a Classic Room is the way to go if you’re looking for a weekend of no-strings sex. Even the smallest Classic Room has plenty of square footage. What’s more, Queen beds mean you’ve plenty of room for rolling about.

If you’re looking for larger beds and more luxurious finishing touches, think about upgrading to a Deluxe. The hotel advertises these rooms at £565 per night, but you can probably secure a stay for less than that if you book elsewhere. As well as being larger, Deluxe rooms come with King size beds as standard.

Thinking about a longer stay? Big spenders might be better served by a Studio Suite. The cheapest suite option at The Marylebone Hotel is a Studio Suite 1. With open-plan layouts and separate seating areas, these suites are ideal for those looking to get away for dirty weekends or week-long trysts. You’ll also benefit from floor-to-ceiling windows, providing you with premium views of this historic city. If you’re content with a Queen bed, you can pick up a suite for as little as £615 per night. Upgrade to a King bed and you can easily double that nightly rate.

Spa Facilities and Premium Experiences

Space is at a premium at The Marylebone Hotel, so don’t expect a huge variety of spa facilities here. If you’re looking to indulge, it’s worth getting in touch with hotel management to arrange in-room treatments and other extras.

Although you won’t find a huge variety of spa facilities here, The Marylebone Hotel does offer some first-rate fitness facilities. Third Space, a premium health club, can be enjoyed by any paying guest for the duration of their stay. The good news is that this is an adults-only facility, meaning you won’t have to dial things down a notch. This hotel also boasts an 18-meter swimming pool, which is something of a rarity when staying at such a central venue.

You’ve also got a couple of great dining options here. 108 Brasserie offers a full breakfast, lunch, and dinner menu. This restaurant is open every day of the week, meaning you shouldn’t struggle to secure a table. However, it’s always best to play it safe and make a reservation. For drinks, head to The Cocktail Bar. Although this bar is open to the public, it’s tucked away from the main street, meaning you won’t have to contend for a table. There’s also a terrace area you can retire to if you’re staying during the warmer months.

Room Service and Extras

The Marylebone Hotel doesn’t disappoint when it comes to extras. A full room service menu is available around the clock. Perfect for guests who don’t play on coming up for air during their stay. If you’re staying for longer, there’s also a laundry and valet service you can take advantage of.

Location

Situated in Marylebone, this hotel is located slap bang in the heart of one of London’s trendiest districts. You’ll find world-famous locations like Oxford Street within walking distance. If you’re itching to get out and explore, Bond Street Underground Station is your best bet. From here, you can catch any Jubilee or Central line train.

Final Thoughts

Tired of checking your watch to see how many minutes you’ve got left until your spouse starts texting? A hotel getaway is the only way to go if you want to get the most out of an affair. Cheating on your other half takes commitment, so why not go the whole hog and book a trip away? If you can come up with a solid excuse to get out of the house for a night or two, don’t skimp when choosing a hotel.

In London, there are hundreds of hotel options to choose from. However, it’s worth spending a little more on a five-star venue to ensure your trip goes with a bang. Planning a longer stay? If you’re in town for more than a couple of nights, avoid budget-friendly compacts and upgrade to a deluxe.

If money is no object, bite the bullet and splash out on a suite. Catering to someone with fine tastes? To make sure you get the most out of the arrangement, choose a hotel with plenty of spa facilities and five-star extras. Premium interiors and fine dining might cost a pretty penny, but they’ll boost your game and get every evening off to a great start.

Best Hotels in New York to Have Sex With Your Affair Partner

Best Hotels in New York to Have Sex

Planning a sneaky getaway with your other woman? City breaks are always the best way to go, even if it’s for a solo vacation. New York is without doubt the best of the bunch. The Big Apple might be expensive, but you get what you pay for. With stunning views of this legendary cityscape, not to mention some of the best restaurants and bars in the western hemisphere, you’re spoiled for choice.

Best Hotels in New York to Have Sex

Thinking about earmarking New York for your next getaway? We’ve put together a list of our favorite hotels for affairs, with options to suit every budget.

Mandarin Oriental, New York

Mandarin Oriental, New York

If you’re catering to refined tastes, the Mandarin Oriental, New York is the perfect place to set up shop during a weekend away. This is one of the Big Apple’s finest hotels. In fact, it’s the only hotel in NYC to be awarded a five-star review by Forbes. Luxury is the order of the day here. Even most of the rooms are sprawling compared to other accommodations in the city. Meanwhile, there’s a renowned VIP spa suite and plenty of in-room treatment options to ensure your stay goes off with a bang. Treat your other woman to a stay here and you can all but guarantee great sex.

Room Details

If it’s luxury you’re after, Mandarin Oriental will deliver. This premium caters to everyone from business travelers to couples looking for the perfect place to be down for a weekend away. Although some rooms boast better views than others, just about any bedroom in this sprawling hotel delivers the goods when it comes to Central Park vistas and waterside views of the Hudson River.

The good news is that Mandarin Oriental, New York isn’t as expensive as you’d think. A double room offering views over the Hudson River can be picked up for as little as $745 per night. As well as a large double bed, you’ll enjoy access to a separate seating area and a fully appointed bathroom. Furthermore, floor-to-ceiling windows ensure you get the best possible views of the Big Apple.

Want a Central Park view? Expect to pay a little bit more for the privilege. Starting rates for rooms with Central Park aspects are $845 per night. However, this is more than worth it for one of the best views in the city. A large double bed comes as standard, while a bathroom with a separate shower is also included. There’s also some impressive tech on offer here, with a 55-inch LED television and top-of-the-line audio speakers included.

Thinking about upgrading to a suite? You have a couple of options here. You can pick up a suite with a Hudson River view for as little as $1,995 per night. As well as a King bed, you’ll benefit from a living room and powder room. What’s more, suite bathrooms are more spacious than what you’ll find in a typical room, with dual sink fixtures and added amenities. If you’re happy to spend a little bit more on a suite, go with a room with a Central Park view. Rates start at around $2,295 per night.

Spa Facilities and Premium Experiences

Mandarin Oriental, New York won’t let you down if you’re after spa and wellness facilities. The on-site spa includes six separate treatment rooms, with a full pampering menu for you to consider. A five-star experience is guaranteed here, with designer decor and deep tubs throughout. There’s also a VIP Spa Suite for those who want a more memorable experience. For an extra special weekend of sex, think about reserving access to this exclusive suite. You’ll benefit from a private fireplace, your own steam room, and a personal shower.

If you’re looking for dining experiences, book a table at MO Lounge. This on-site establishment offers a full menu of American cuisine throughout the day. What’s more, you’ll find an impressive selection of cocktails to choose from. With unbeatable views of the inspiring NYC skyline, there’s no better place to enjoy a nightcap when you’re taking a break from the bedroom.

Room Service and Extras

If your main goal is to get your end away when staying overnight in New York, in-room dining is a must. Thankfully, Mandarin Oriental delivers first-rate dining experiences, even if you don’t feel like leaving your room. You can opt for an in-room breakfast if you order before 11.30 am, while lunch and dinner are available from noon until 11 pm. Overnight room service is also available, catering to out-of-hours requests.

Location

When you stay at Mandarin Oriental, New York, you’re within close proximity to some of the Big Apple’s most popular landmarks and attractions. The Broadway Theater District is just a couple of minutes away, while Central Park lies right next door. This hotel is also situated in the heart of Columbus Circle, one of New York’s premier shopping districts.

Crosby Street Hotel

Crosby Street Hotel

The Crosby Street Hotel has been around for little more than a decade. However, it has quickly secured a reputation for itself. This hotel is definitely luxurious, but you won’t find yourself paying over the odds for a single night or weekend stay here. The rooms aren’t the largest in the city, but the beds are certainly big enough to play host to all manner of nocturnal activity. What’s more, this hotel boasts a secluded terrace. Perfect if you’re looking to take a breather from sex, but don’t want to stray into the crowded streets of NYC.

Room Details

The Crosby is a pretty small hotel, so don’t expect a huge number of rooms available at any one time. However, there’s a good variety here. A Superior King Room is a good choice if you’re on a budget. You’ll get a King bed, plus all the amenities you’d expect from a premium hotel, including a walk-in shower and freestanding tub. Minibars, WiFi access, and complimentary toiletries all come as standard. Room rates vary, but you should be able to secure an overnight stay for around $1,100 if you’re chasing a last-minute booking. To save money, it’s best to check your schedule and free up a few days away from home. You can make a neat saving if you book 2-3 days in a row.

If you’re after luxury, upgrade to a suite. A standard Crosby Suite offers you more square footage, as well as a larger bed so you can get up to more antics. Although you’ll benefit from premium extras, a suite will set you back at least twice the amount of a standard room. Again, timing is everything if you want to secure the best price.

Spa Facilities and Premium Experiences

There aren’t any spa facilities on offer at this hotel. However, guests can enjoy 24-hour access to an on-site gym and fitness center. What really sets this hotel apart from other boutique destinations in the city is its private lounge and drawing room. Provided you’re not a local who runs the risk of bumping into a friend or acquaintance, these romantic spots are perfect for kicking back and unwinding in at the end of a long day.

This hotel also boasts its own cinema room. Every Sunday evening, The Crosby Hotel plays host to a private film screening. If you’re looking to save on extras during your trip to New York, here’s one way to make a saving.

The Crosby Hotel can’t compete with larger establishments when it comes to fine dining. However, there is an on-site restaurant that should more than cater to your appetites. There’s also a hotel bar for nightcaps, as well as an excellent breakfast and brunch menu.

Room Service and Extras

If you’re only in town for a brief spell, you probably won’t want to leave your room for extended periods. The good news is that The Crosby Hotel offers a great room service menu. Room service is 24 hours, meaning you don’t have to play to anyone else’s schedule when enjoying a weekend of sex. What’s more, each room comes equipped with a fully stocked mini-bar to save you trips downstairs or to the terrace.

Location

If you’re staying in Manhattan, there’s no such thing as a bad location. That being said, The Crosby Hotel is located in a particularly lively spot in the SoHo area of the city. There are tons of restaurants and bars within walking distance, while the Museum of Modern Art Design is located right next door. Want to get out and explore? Spring Street station is just a block away, providing easy access to the rest of Manhattan and Long Island.

The Bowery Hotel

The Bowery Hotel

If you want to rub shoulders with the stars while enjoying a sex-filled weekend away, The Bowery Hotel is the place to be. As with any NYC hotel, this is an expensive destination, but it’s more affordable than you’d think. Rooms are fairly simple, but you’ll find everything you need for a steamy weekend. There are also plenty of on-site amenities, with a trendy bar and lounge providing the perfect spot to escape to if you need to catch a breath.

Room Details

Thinking about a stay at The Bowery Hotel? There are a ton of room options to choose from. However, if you’re planning a night or two beneath the sheets, a standard Queen room isn’t going to cut out. For maximum comfort, choose a Bowery King. As well as a King bed, you’ll benefit from a marble bathroom, complete with a rainfall shower. These rooms are also fairly large, with a standard King providing you with 250 square feet. If you want more square footage, go for a Superior King. A single night in one of these rooms will set you back around $785. For $30 more, upgrade to a Deluxe King. These rooms are even larger, with the added luxury of a deep soaking tub.

If you need a little more room, think about upgrading to a Studio Suite. These loft-style rooms are kitted out with King beds and separate seating areas. Perfect for longer stays, these suites are the way to go if you’re the kind of couple who like to experiment. A single night is going to be pretty expensive if you’re going the suite route. However, you can make a considerable savings by booking a couple of months in advance.

Spa Facilities and Premium Experiences

The Bowery isn’t the largest hotel. As such, there’s no on-site spa to speak of. However, you can take advantage of a range of in-room spa treatments. Need a massage? Simply speak to the front desk to arrange a pampering session that won’t cost a fortune. If you’re staying for longer than a couple of days, you can also arrange personal trainers and other premium extras.

The Bowery Hotel also has an on-site restaurant, Gemma. This Italian establishment offers a traditional trattoria menu, with experienced chefs serving up seasonal cuisine throughout the year. As this restaurant is open to the public, you’ll probably need to make a reservation, even if you’re staying during the week. If you’re simply looking for a quick drink, The Bowery Lobby will cater to your needs. There’s a huge range of cocktails to sample here, and the wine list is also impressive.

Room Service and Extras

Not in the mood for a sit-down dinner? Not to worry. The Bowery Hotel offers guests room service, whatever the time of day. The 24-hour room service menu is surprisingly extensive, meaning you don’t have to compromise if you don’t feel like budging from bed. However, don’t expect any major price difference when you compare in-room dining to the restaurant menu.

Location

The Bowery Hotel is part of Manhattan’s Lower East Side. If you’re looking to escape to the hustle and bustle of the downtown district, this is the perfect place to stay. Several subway stations are within walking distance of the hotel lobby, providing quick and easy connections to the rest of the city. However, you’ll also find several points of interest within walking distance. Hudson Square is just a few minutes to the west, while Little Italy is also nearby.

The Ned NoMad

The Ned NoMad

It’s strange to call a hotel sexy, but The Ned NoMad is exactly that. With its Parisian-inspired interiors and luxurious finishing touches, no other hotel is going to put in the mood quite like this one. With more than 160 guest rooms, you shouldn’t struggle to secure a stay at this premium destination. The Ned NoMad also caters to all budgets. If you’re on a budget, there are basic room options that won’t break the bank. However, luxurious suites are also on hand for big spenders looking to go all out to impress.

Room Details

With 167 bedrooms to choose from, there’s no shortage of accommodation options at The Ned NoMad. So-called Cosy Rooms are great if you’re flying solo, but if you’re heading to New York for a weekend of sex, it’s best to upgrade to a Large Room. With open-plan layouts, King beds, and a separate seating area, you’ve all the amenities you need for a dirty weekend away. Large rooms aren’t exactly cheap at $1,200 per night, but you get a lot for your money.

If you’re after a bit more breathing room, think about upgrading to an Atrium Studio. These are as close as you’ll get to a suite at The Ned NoMad. In addition to a large bedroom area with plentiful seating, there’s a separate bathroom, shower room, and water closet. Prices are fairly reasonable, with starting rates of $1,247 per night. Every room type in this hotel also boasts an Emperor mattress, produced by leading manufacturers Hypnos. These mattresses are great for sleeping, but they hold up pretty well when it comes to more energetic bedroom activities.

Spa Facilities and Premium Experiences

Currently, The Ned doesn’t offer much in the way of spa facilities. However, in-room services can be arranged if you speak to the front desk. The good news is that The Ned doesn’t skimp on dining options and nighttime entertainment. Paying guests can enjoy access to the on-site restaurant, The Dining Room. There’s also the Little Ned cocktail bar for late-night drinks. Looking for live entertainment? The Magic Room can be found on-site and is often considered one of New York’s best-kept secrets.

Room Service and Extras

Although The Ned offers multiple on-site dining options, not everyone who stays here wants to get dressed and head down for dinner. Fortunately, this premium hotel provides an impressive room service menu. You won’t always be able to access full restaurant menus, but you will get access to a first-rate pick of light bites and late-night meals.

Location

The Ned is located within the Johnston Building, an iconic landmark in Manhattan. Public transport connections are plentiful in this part of New York. However, you’ll also find plenty of first-rate attractions right on your doorstep. The Empire State Building is just a couple of minutes away from the hotel, while the trendy Chelsea district is also nearby.

Final Thoughts

The last thing you want to worry about when enjoying a weekend of sex with your other woman is whether you’re going to get caught out. Thankfully, it’s easy to get lost in the Big Apple. If you want to be right in the heart of it all, Manhattan hotels are the way to go. A standard double isn’t going to be cheap in this part of the world, but book a stay in a highrise venue and you’ll be rewarded with incredible views.

In New York, there are thousands of potential hotels to choose from. However, to get the most out of your stay, spend a little more on a hotel that delivers. At a minimum, you’ll want a bed that’s big enough to keep you with you and your sexual escapades. Don’t plan on leaving the room during your stay? You’ll want to be staying somewhere that offers in-room dining or operates 24-hour room service. If you’re in town longer, a suite or studio room might be a good idea. These rooms can be fairly pricey, but if you book early enough, you can often bag one for the same rate as a standard double.

How To End An Affair The Easy Way

How To End An Affair The Easy Way

Extramarital affairs are fun while they last. Maybe you’ve sought out a side piece to make up for a lack of passion in the bedroom. Perhaps an innocent gym visit led to a steamy encounter in the showers. However you ended up playing away from home, you’ve probably enjoyed yourself.

However, not all affairs are built to last. Some affairs only last for a month, while around half of all extramarital relationships are snuffed out before the year is out. Maybe you’re one of the lucky ones who’s been able to stretch things out for longer. Long-term affairs aren’t unheard of, with around 30% of all affairs lasting for more than a couple of years.

If all’s going well and your other half doesn’t suspect anything, there’s no good reason to think about ending things prematurely. However, now might be the time to take a step back and consider your options. Are you tired of finding excuses to escape the home and meet up with your other woman? Are colleagues starting to get suspicious about what you’re really up to outside of the office? Maybe you simply can’t afford to keep two women on the go. If managing an affair is becoming too much to handle, now’s the time to get out while you still can.

Worried about how to approach the situation? Our guide breaks down everything you need to know about ending an affair, without getting burned in the process.

How To End An Affair?

Is it Time to End Things?

Before you start planning on how to back out of an affair, it’s worth asking yourself whether or not you’re truly ready to end things. It’s not uncommon for first-time cheats to suffer from low-level anxiety. Even if you’re only occasionally meeting up with another woman for sex, the overwhelming feeling of guilt can be distracting.

Struggling with a constant knot in your stomach? Forever looking over your shoulder? If you’re still feeling like this after months of hooking up with a side piece, you might as well take a step back and rethink your options. Even if there’s no real chance of you getting found out, these anxious feelings can sap all the fun out of playing away. Breaking things off now might be a good idea. You can take stock and reconsider your play for the future. If the itch to sleep around comes back, you can start with a fresh slate.

Sometimes, the need to end an affair is triggered by warning signs. Is your side piece getting clingy? Are they giving you the impression that they want to take things beyond a sex-only arrangement? Ideally, you’ll have made your expectations clear before dropping your pants for your first encounter. However, even the most level-headed other women can quickly become a living nightmare.

Thankfully, bunny boiler tendencies are quick to present themselves. That being said, it’s sometimes the more subtle things you need to watch out for. Is your side piece pulling out all the stops to bolster your self-esteem? An occasional compliment isn’t too suspicious, but if she’s putting in way too much effort to build you up, something else might be afoot. After all, you’re both in the situation you’re in for sex. If she’s going overboard to impress, she might be after more than a stolen hour under the sheets.

Occasionally, things might boil over early enough in a relationship for you to put the brakes on things. It’s natural for your other woman to get jealous from time to time, especially if you’ve been going at it for a few months. However, any outright threats to reveal your affair are clear signs you need to back out of the arrangement.

Destroy the Evidence

Destroy the Evidence

Now you’ve decided you want to break things off, it’s time to start covering your tracks. Once you tell your side piece that things are over, things can move quickly. If she takes it well, you’ve got nothing to worry about. If she takes it badly, you could be dealing with some serious fallout.

Preempt this by deleting all evidence of your affair. Have you been using dating apps to find local hookups? Remove them from your phone and personal devices. Have you been using adult-only websites and paying subscriptions? As well as canceling these subscriptions, you’ll want to get rid of any paper trail tying you to them.

If you’ve been running another woman on the side for some time, you’ve probably spent some money on her. Any man who doesn’t want to get caught out cheating should be incredibly careful when managing their finances. Prepaid credit cards and cash are the only way to go when it comes to paying for hotels, covering the costs of trips away, and splashing out on gifts to increase your odds of getting some.

However, all these transactions come with a paper trail. To avoid this issue, you should have switched to online-only statements. If you’ve been receiving paper statements and stashing them away somewhere secure, now’s the time to introduce them to a shredder. Better still, burn them.

When it comes to destroying the evidence of your affair, there’s no such thing as being too clinical. Treat the process like removing any trace of yourself from a crime scene. Even the slightest bit of evidence can give the entire game away, so leave no stone unturned when covering your tracks.

Get Your Story Straight

You need to approach the breakup itself with a clear idea of what you’re going to say. If you’ve decided you want to put a stop to things, there’s room for negotiation. Unless you’re dealing with an incredibly casual person, there’s a good chance they’re going to try and emotionally blackmail you into keeping things going.

You don’t want to approach things with a word-by-word script but should at least have a loose idea of what you’re going to say. Be accountable and take charge of the situation, letting your affair partner know that you’ve made a decision and you’re not budging from it. Unless you were stupid enough to make hollow promises of being in it for the long run, you don’t need to go overboard with apologies. Most affairs are based on sex, so you shouldn’t really have to worry about breaking anyone’s heart.

Any man looking to break off an affair also needs to prepare what they’ll say to their spouse if things go south. You might walk away from an affair-ending conversation assuming all’s done and dusted. However, there’s always a chance your side piece is going to mull things over and decide they’re not quite done with you yet.

Sometimes, you may find yourself having to deal with endless texts and late-night calls asking you to rethink your position. If you’ve been firm about where you stand, the more likely next step is your side piece trying to fuck things up for you at home. It’s rare, but there’s always the chance they’ll get in touch with your spouse, a colleague, or a friend to let me know what you’ve been up to.

Even if this happens, you don’t have to actually own up to anything. Play your cards right, and you can quickly defuse this kind of situation. Line up an oven-ready story that covers all your tracks. “She’s some nut from an office party from last year who wouldn’t take no for an answer” is a good option.

If you’re brave enough to mix fiction with truth, think about admitting to a minor indiscretion. This way, you can play the angle that a relatively trivial encounter has been blown out of all proportion. It’s a risky tactic, but it saves you from having to keep too many plates spinning. Although your spouse is likely to hit the roof at even a mild admittance of guilt, once the dust has settled, you won’t have to continue fielding questions and after.

Prepare for the Worst

Prepare for the Worst

There are many reasons why men play away from home. There’s no crime about chasing other women for sex, but that doesn’t mean breaking things off with another woman isn’t without risk. Sometimes, ending an affair can mean kissing goodbye to your marriage or long-term relationship as well.

You’ll know whether you’re in trouble if your other woman takes things back when you knock things on the head with her. To make the next few weeks of your life as easy as possible, assume crash positions and brace for the worst.

Getting your story straight and destroying any evidence of your indiscretions are all well and good, but it won’t guarantee you’ll get away scot-free. If you’re only tied to a long-term girlfriend, dealing with the fallout is fairly easy. Unless you’re tied down to a joint mortgage or share children with them, a relationship-ending scenario will only involve you going your separate ways. If you’re married and have a lot more irons in the fire, things get a lot more complicated.

Did you agree to a prenuptial agreement before tying the knot? Take a second look to see what this contract says to get an idea of what kind of punishment you’re in for. Infidelity won’t go down well with a female judge or jury if things end up in divorce court. Getting these agreements changed down the line is only going to arouse suspicion, so avoid this approach. Instead, get a little creative about protecting your assets. Do you have any residual income your spouse doesn’t know about? Do you have assets that you can temporarily relocate so they’re not bundled into any divorce settlement?

Putting Things into Practice

Have you decided that it’s time to bring an affair to an end? As well as taking all of the above into account, you’ll want to approach things with a clear, step-by-step agenda. Below, you’ll find a 10-step plan that will make ending any affair that much easier.

1. Commit to a Decision and Expect Consequences

Whether you’re carrying on with a colleague or seeing a married friend, you’ll need to be final in your decision to end an affair. For many men, coming to this decision is incredibly hard. If you’ve been at it for long enough, you might have built up a pretty tight relationship with your other woman. Even if you’re only it for the sex, saying goodbye to fuss-free fucking is a hard bullet to bite.

You also need to be realistic about the ramifications of ending an affair. Cutting things off with a colleague? Things could get messy at the office. If you’ve been foolish enough to chase a female manager or direct superior, expect even more complications. Been going at with an unattached single? Just because she can get back on the market as soon as possible, doesn’t mean she will. What’s more, if she’s unattached, she’ll have nothing to lose if she decides to make your life a living hell.

2. Have the Talk

Unless they’re wired wrong, nobody enjoys breaking things off with someone. Don’t assume ending an affair is going to be simpler than bringing a full-fledged relationship to a close. Things might be built on sex, but those steamy encounters might mean a lot to the other person.

If you’re worried that your affair partner might not take the news well, be meticulous when choosing your sentences. Don’t compensate for their low self-esteem by going overboard with compliments. They might see these as glimmers of hope that all’s not lost. Instead, frame it so they feel confident enough to go out and get it on with someone new.

A confident side piece might seem like they’ll take the news more easily. However, a cocky attitude is often a sign you’re dealing with a narcissist. If they think highly enough of themselves, they’re not going to be put off by your reluctance to keep things going. They might try and convince you that you’re overreacting and there’s nothing to worry about. Alternatively, they might pull the rug from under you and tell you in no uncertain terms that the affair is going to continue, whether you like it or not. Don’t pander to this kind of person. Recommit to your decision, stand your ground, then walk away.

Been seeing your other woman for years? This is a difficult situation and there’s bound to be some emotional connection here. Whatever the reason for the breakup, you’ll need to be cautious in your approach here. The good news is that, if your other woman thinks highly enough of you, they’re not going to want to cause you any problems. However, just make it clear that you’re going back to your wife, rather than freeing yourself up to pursue other women.

3. Should You Confess Everything to Your Spouse?

Depending on how well things have gone so far, it might be time to think about confessing some or all of your antics to your other half. Did you get the feeling your side piece is going to cause you trouble in the future? Rather than live with a constant feeling of uncertainty, it’s sometimes a good idea to admit to being unfaithful.

It’s ultimately up to you whether you decide on a one-off sexual encounter or a months-long affair. For most men, it’s best to pretend that things fell somewhere in the middle. No woman likes to find out she’s been played, so expect fireworks. If you have a history of cheating, your admission may be the thing that breaks the camel’s back. If it’s the first time you’ve cheated, or at least the first time you’ve been caught out, you can usually patch things up.

4. Cut Off All Contact

Now you’ve broken things off and potentially let your other half know what’s happened, it’s time to put up walls between you and your former affair partner. Block their number and delete it from your contact list. If you’ve added them on social media, remove them from your friend lists or stop using those platforms entirely. This isn’t just about preventing them from getting in touch with you in the future. In a couple of months, you may find the urge to get in touch yourself and arrange a meeting. Getting rid of every trace of them is the only way to stop these reconnections from happening.

5. Let Your Spouse Know You’ve Changed

Sometimes, ending an affair doesn’t go as planned. If you’ve been caught out and had to break off an affair to save your marriage, or simply found yourself admitting to your infidelity, you’ll need to commit to change.

Obviously, not every man who gets caught out wants to change their ways. However, you’ll need to at least give the impression that you’re prepared to work on yourself. If your spouse suggests it as a deal breaker, be prepared for couples’ counseling. It will put her mind at rest and help you position yourself as a changed man.

The problem here is that most relationship counselors aren’t idiots. If you’re still chasing skirt outside of your relationship, an experienced professional is going to be able to spot the signs. Unless you’re a sociopath with a flair for subterfuge, you’re not going to be able to cover your tracks.

How do you get around this? Try and limit any couples’ counseling to a short-term arrangement. Agree to a few sessions as a gesture of goodwill, practice what’s being preached to you, then discuss bringing things to a close. If you’re acting the part at home, there’s a good chance that your wife or girlfriend will go for this. If they need a little nudge, bring up how much counseling is costing. You don’t need to pay a stranger hundreds of dollars an hour for soundbite advice you can pull off the internet. Need to sweeten things further? Mention how that money could be put to better use, like trips away or other things to liven things up at home.

The Urge to Cheat: When to Act Again

Some men find the strain of ending an affair and patching up a marriage too much like hard work to entertain pursuing another affair in the future. However, with some careful planning, you can satisfy your sexual urges and start up another affair sooner than you think.

Admittedly, it’s best to leave plenty of time to settle in between extramarital affairs. If your spouse has gotten wind of your previous antics, they’re going to be looking for signs that you’re playing away again. In most cases, these questions are going to be there for life, but dealing with casual suspicion is different from feeling like you have the CIA on your back 24/7.

To make life easy on yourself, give it a few months before even entertaining the notion of finding your next side piece. If you need to satisfy the urge sooner than that, don’t be too proud to seek out escorts or pay for sex. If you don’t feel like paying for it, use adult-only hookup sites. There’s a good chance you’ll find more than a few women looking to meet for nothing more than sex.

If you go down this route, play it safe and lock down your alibi. More importantly, avoid meeting the same woman more than once. Your aim here should be to avoid getting wrapped up in another complicated arrangement. For now, extramarital sex should be a one-and-done thing. If you’ve swapped numbers to arrange a meet, delete the details once you’ve gotten down to business. This way, you’re not going to be tempted to arrange a second round.

Starting Up Your Next Affair

Starting Up Your Next Affair

One-off sex sessions can go a long way in scratching that itch to cheat. They’re also easier to cover for. Eventually, however, the same reasons that drove you to play away in the first place are going to come back into play. After a few months or a year have passed, it might be the best time to find your next affair partner.

Where do you go to find your next side piece? If you’re still picking up the pieces from your last affair being blown wide open, don’t shit on your own doorstep. Colleagues and mutual acquaintances are a no-go. Even strangers living locally should be avoided.

Heading online is often the easiest way to find an affair partner for no-strings sex. If you’re talking with someone who’s interested in something long-term, make sure you stress you’re only looking for casual encounters. If they take the bait, make sure you’ve got your guard up during those early days. Any red flags that suggest you’re dealing with a bunny boiler in the making shouldn’t be ignored. It’s much better to back out now and block their number than leave things simmering for months. You’re only going to land yourself in hot water again.

If your other half has upped her game and is constantly monitoring you for signs of infidelity, you’ll have to get creative. Do you work for yourself? Rethink your schedule so you’ve plenty of time to hook up with potential sex partners. Finding it hard to excuse yourself from the home? See how you can adjust your routine to escape prying eyes for hours at a time. Trips to the gym are an easy way to get away for a while and you can roll out these excuses every day of the week if needed.

However quickly you decide to get back on the market, never forget how tricky ending an affair is. Some men need emotional connections outside of their main relationship, but breaking off one of these affairs can be almost as difficult as backing out of a marriage. If your sole focus is sex, a succession of one-night stands or afternoon encounters is a much better option.

How to Pickup MILFs | My Step By Step Formula

How to Pickup MILFs

Maybe it’s me, but whenever I hear the term MILF, even to this day I can’t help but think of Stifler’s Mom from American Pie. She was the epitome of what a good looking MILF would look like in those days. Of course, if you don’t know what a MILF is, check out what it means here.

Since then, MILFs have become even more stunning. Ladies of lunch have been replaced by women going to the gym and ageing down through exercise, yoga and sometimes a little botox.

Personally, I’ve always been into older women. Even when I was single. There is always something so attractive about them, the maturity, the experience the ‘having gone around the block‘ that younger women just don’t have.

Dating Younger Guys Is Now Cool

Dating Younger Guys Is Now Cool

What’s become so fascinating is whenever I read the entertainment section of various magazines, what was frowned upon years ago, has now become the norm. And that is older women stepping out with young guys. It’s almost like it’s sense of achievement older women have garnered. The most famous of course of them being Marcon and his wife. She used to be his teacher and now she’s married to him.

And just when I thought I was alone, the trend amongst many younger guys is to bag themselves or at least have an experience with an older woman. And I can tell you from firsthand experience, it’s the best. Of course I’m never going to not admit that having fun with younger 20 something year old hotties isn’t fun too, but once you’ve actually slept with them a couple of times, their inexperience in that department is super evident.

The Difference Between A Milf And A Cougar

difference between a MILF and A Cougar

  • Now I could be entirely wrong here, but from my own adventures with both, cougars revel in the attention and often go out of their way to land guys younger than them. Whilst MILFs are just very attractive mums that don’t seek out relationships or the attention. Cougars are a bit like me, they go through relationships faster than you can imagine, validating their good lucks by dating different guys.
  • Cougars are substantially easier to pickup too. They’re out at night, partying with the youngsters, acting like they’re teenagers again, wearing very suggestive clothing and actively looking to get hit on. With the right Cougar if there’s an attraction, you can buy them a drink and before you know it you’re in the cab on the way back to theirs. You’ll catch them at lady’s night of most clubs and they very sexually liberated. They’re less into the talking and more interested in the sex only. And for the most part, Cougars factor your age into everything. For them to feel validated, they prefer guys substantially younger than them – the younger the guy the greater the achievement. So if you’re a young guy, looking to pick up older women, Cougars are 100% the way to go.
  • Cougars are very proud of being cougars, they bask in knowing that younger men want to sleep with them. And the ones I’ve slept with are generally divorced. They’re also experts in getting married guys to chase them.
  • MILFs on the other hand are quite the opposite. They’re more often shy, and even if they’re drop dead attractive, they still somehow convince themselves that they’re really not. They’re not into chasing or being chased by guys and most of them are so into their families that to convince them to have a relationship let alone an affair is so far out of the realm of possibility for them.
  • A Cougar is proud of her age, a MILF is conscious of her age.
  • You’ll never catch a MILF out in a club (rarely), let alone on dating sites or dating apps. They’re not at all susceptible to flirting and cheesy pickup lines have no effect on them. MILFs have huge emotional maturity and will always pick hanging out with their kids than hanging out with friends. When a young men try and hit on MILFs – they tend not to get very far, and MILFs (unlike cougars) – will laugh it off and say things like ‘oh you’re sweet‘ or the classic ‘I’m old enough to be your mother‘.

Whilst older women can be hot as hell, many of them looking dramatically younger than they really are, they tend to either fall into either the MILF camp or the cougar camp. And given guys like me love the chase, want that emotional attachment as well as the physical, MILFs are a far better choice.

Where To Find These MILFs

Where To Find These MILFs

So where do you find these MILFs if they’re not hitting the town at night or doing the whole online dating thing. Well of course they go out, but you’re hardly going to be able to pick them up on a mum’s night out. Just imagine how quickly that would get back to her husband, her chatting to you. No, you have to be smarter than that:

  1. School Gates – if you’re a married man like me, with young kids, chances are you’ll always meet MILFs during the school drop offs or school pickups. It’s a non threatening environment, and whilst you may not be able to approach some of these attractive mums randomly, the school is the perfect place. Because the one thing you’ll have in common is that your kids attend the same place. It’s easy to start a conversation be it about the kids, the school or even having a little bitch about either the teachers or some of the more weird parents. In fact that last MILF I had a fling with, this is exactly where I met her. We saw each other twice a day for months to the point that it was normal to speak as much as we did.
  2. In the park walking the dog – I live in a part of the world where I’m next to several parks. And every day I see older, attractive women out there walking their dogs. In fact they’re so regimented about their timings that you can almost bank your watch on it. So if you don’t happen to have a dog, borrow one. If you can’t, be sure to be exercising around the same time everyday so that you become a familiar face. Easier to say hi and strike up a conversation from there.
  3. The gym – after dropping of the kids, a heck of a lot of MILFs head to the gym. They’re more conscious about their weight and pyshcique than they ever have been and so many have become so disciplined they look better now than they did before having kids. I did discuss this in a post on how to pick up married women at the gym because for me, I’ve had THE MOST success in this area.
  4. Supermarkets – you tend to see a lot of MILFs doing their weekly or daily shop at the same supermarket. Now whilst I’ve never tried or had success hitting on women in the supermarket (only because I find it’s a bit too intrusive) I’ve heard of plenty of success stories from men that have had huge success here. They’ve found that women seem to be less guarded, easier to get eye contact and strike up a conversation. I live in hope that this happens for me one day.
  5. Work – lots of women work. And many of them are married with kids. The fact that they work in an office tends to mean that they’re very well dressed and pay huge attention to looking on point. Having an affair with a co-worker is so common. If you think about how much time you spend at work it’s not abnormal to become very attached to people in your office. Some of my best flings have derived from some of the women I’ve met at work.

That’s just to name a few, but there’s always shopping malls, health food shops, the beach, the car wash, etc, etc, etc…

Things To Appreciate About Older Women (especially if they’re married).

What I love about MILFs is that they don’t always know they’re hot. It’s rare that their husband tells them they are, and the truth is, if you’ve been married for a while there’s a strong chance that life and kids and everything else has taken front and centre.

It’s rare for them to feel sexy or to even get a meaningful conversation with their significant other because everyone’s always rushing around, working or exhausted. They don’t get to spend as much alone time with their partners as they used to and visits to the local bar are very infrequent.

In fact, like for so many people out there, life has become monotonous. It’s got a routine. And whilst a MILF may walk the dog and do school runs and the shopping and maybe even go to work – there’s still something that’s very routine about it. Having kids will force a routine into your life because it’s exactly what they need.

My System On Picking Up MILFs

My System On Picking Up MILFs

Before I share my system, let me just say this is unique to me. You’re more than welcome to copy me if you think you can pull it off. In writing this piece, I did a cursory glance around the internet and as usual found one article with tips (which were too general and too generic) – and then a whole bunch of other articles that simply re-wrote and reworded the same article. To be really honest, when I read every other article on internet about how to date MILFs, I found that they just had been written from a place of theory. It struck me that most if not all of the authors and no real world experience in the real world on how to pick up hotter, older, attractive women.

My advice to you is follow my structure a bit, but stick to your strengths. So if you’re funny, be funny, if you’re handsome, play on that, if you’re sporty, play on that, etc, etc, etc..

My Approach – AIDA

I pick up women the same way I do deals in business, by following the simple steps of AIDA. Attention, interest, decision, action.

It’s hard to get someone to jump into the sack with you if you can’t get their attention, then garner their interest, then lead them into making a decision (eg having a drink – dinner) with you and them taking action (going all the way).

How To Pickup MILFs – My System

How To Pickup MILFs - My System 

It’s my nature to chat to anyone. I’m a chatty person. I could strike up a conversation with a tree if I had to, and boy oh boy, after a few drinks you’d be hard pressed to shut me up. I also happen to think I’m pretty funny. I pride myself on making people laugh. And it doesn’t hurt that I’m uber perscitpive. Like frighteningly perceptive.

So I take these 3 qualities and I put them to good use.

Attention

So here’s what I do, I make sure I chat to someone who is used to seeing me daily. If it’s a MILF I’m after, I stick to the school gate or the gym. It’s where I have had my biggest luck.

I start by making sure I get their attention. Whether it’s a smile, a hello or small talk. And every day I see them, I make sure I’m consistent. Part of my process is to go from being a random guy to a familiar face. In the early days whatever I do, I don’t rush in and have these huge chats or get them laughing – NO SIR. All I do is make sure I just being familiar.

Interest – Flattery

Backhanded compliments get you everywhere. Remember married women don’t get hit on that much and chances are their own husbands will rarely compliment them. Making them feel attractive is going to get you very far. And so for me, I love using flattery, but not outright compliments but slight ones. For example I took my kids to football practice the other day. There’s this one Pervy horrendous dad always diving in to talk to the mums. Well he actually focuses on the nannies but sometimes he talks to the mums. So I met this one mum there that I was totally besotted with. She would see me every Saturday and like I mentioned above, I’d always make a point of saying hello and smiling at her. After a few Saturdays,  I was no longer some random person.

Somehow we got into a conversation and I pointed out this creepy guy to her. I made some jokes about him, she laughed. Then I turned to her and asked her if he had started to hit on her yet. She quizzically looked at me and shook her head.

I then said:

“I’m really surprised, he always hits on all the hot women”

And there it was, I called her hot without quite saying I find you hot. I noticed her blushing ever so slightly and the second she did, I asked which coffee she wanted from the coffee cart.

From then on every Saturday it went from chit chat, to both of us looking forward to seeing each other, to her saving me a chair next to her and waiting for me. All this in just a few weeks. I always paid her compliments on her shoes or her clothes, or the type of mother she was, but again, not always overt.

Then, the next step in my process is to talk outside of seeing each other. And that means Instagram. I’d always make sure they’d give me their Instagram handle and I’d get them to follow me back whilst I was there.

Each day I’d post or reshare other people’s stories and check to see if they were watching. Instagram allows you to see who sees your stories and for me that was a further sign they were interested. I may forward them something of interest to them and see if they respond, etc..

All of these are signs that there’s some level of interest. It may not be romantic yet, but I’ve come a long way from being a random guy.

Decision – Time To Introduce A Bit More

Now here comes the hard bit.

I start to confide in them. I’d be totally honest with them about being married. I’d tell them that I cheat, I explain why and I’d make a point of saying I preferred only younger women.

I know all this sounds crazy. But once there’s a certain level of familiarity and trust there, I start with this confession. I explain that I love the attention, how I love my family, but I need that bit extra outside of my marriage. I tell her that I’d never leave my wife, but whilst my kids are young it’s only fair they get most of her attention.

Interestingly, what typically happens is a few things:

Now a few things can happen here. Firstly they become completely shocked and almost turn religious on me and try and fix me. They’ll advise I need counselling or therapy. They live in this idealistic world of what marriage should be and try and impose that on me. If this happens, I know nothing will ever happen for a while with them and me. It can later by the odds are hugely diminished.

OR

Fascination takes over:

  1. They become TOTALLY curious: Chances are they are so fascinated and ask me so many questions like, why, how, where and how do I get away with it, etc…
  2. Fascinated: They want to here all the stories of the women, the escapades, what I say, how I do it – they want to almost live vicariously through my stories.
  3. Younger Women: Even through it’s not true, I want them to feel relaxed around me and so I make a point of saying that I only date younger women, single women.

I then amp up the communication on Instagram – every now and then I may send them a good morning message, or a good night message – I get to the point where I send daily messages and so that they’re now used to it. It’s become normal to communicate with me normally. I may even send them profiles of younger looking women and asking them for advice on how to bag them… (all part of the plan).

After a bit of time, they’ve gone from not knowing me, to looking forward to our chats to almost expecting it. Without even realising it, I’ve become a daily part of their life.

At this point, they may even start telling me more about their life and sharing their problems with me. I become their shoulder, their confidant, someone they’ll run ideas past. At this point we’re micro cheating and almost verging on having an emotional affair.

Action – Time To Make A Move

What happens next is, unless I take action, push for a drink or dinner, I will stay in this no mans land or friend zone. I need a sign that she’s ready to take it forward a bit more.

It’s time to suggest dinner or food. Anything to get her out alone with you.

Remember, once you’re out for dinner or drinks at a discreet bar – it’s all about flirting.

The smiles, the gentle touches – the odd sexual innuendo. She’s only there because she’s fascinated, wants you to make a move and knows that you know how to have affairs discreetly and not get caught. She wants to be guided into this world by someone who’s successful in it.

And just by mentioning you prefer younger women is in some strange way going to make her fight for your attention and make you see her as attractive as a younger woman. She wants to know that her age is not a factor and she’ll work very hard to ensure that she looks her very best. Plus, her body language will tell you whether you should be making a move to kiss her or not.

Be observant and pay attention to the signs. She’s there for a reason. And if she’s lied to her husband about where she is then that’s an even bigger sign she wants you to make a move.

Things I Never Do To Keep A MILF Into Me

In Conclusion

A young man will rarely have the patience to go after a MILF. If they like an older woman a Cougar is a far easier to close than a MILF. They have to wait less and given we live in an instant society, waiting weeks or months to bed a MILF may just be too hard. Especially when younger guys are used to dealing with young girls. Remember to learn what older women want in bed, and it’s not what you think.

There’s no easy way to pick up a MILF. It’s a process. And convincing someone to have an affair with you is going to take some time. It’s a matter of patience. Have faith in the knowledge that somethings really do take time. But believe you me, the relationship with a MILF is the best type of relationship you can have.

That said, there’s of course a risk. You don’t want to damage lives and you need to make sure both you and her are careful. You don’t want to get caught. It’s a balancing act.

I wish I told you I had an easy answer in how to pickup MILFs – but whenever I’ve rushed it in the past they’ve just shut down and seen me as sleazy. Play it cool, be cool, be kind, observant, flattering and genuine and it’ll happen.

Most women want attention and want to feel sexy, despite their age or what she’s wearing. Knowing and appreciating this will get you having relationships with women you never thought possible.

4 Best Hotels in Chicago to Have Sex With An Affair Partner

Best Hotels in Chicago to Have Sex

Planning a dirty weekend in the Windy City? Perhaps you’re a local looking to get away from home for a night of no-strings sex. There’s no shortage of premium hotels in Chicago, with five-star options aplenty. Ready to take your affair up a notch?

Best Hotels in Chicago to Have Sex

Don’t skimp when choosing a venue for your next meet. If you’ve freed up some time in your schedule for a solo vacation or a long-overdue dirty weekender, why not go the whole hog and treat yourself to a suite? Can you only get away for a single night? A compact hotel room in Downtown Chicago might save you a few dollars, but a cramped double bed isn’t going to cut it when it comes to getting down and dirty. Looking for the best hotels in Chicago to have an affair? We’ve got you covered.

The Langham

The Langham

If you’re looking to enjoy a five-star stay, you can do a lot worse than The Langham. This premium hotel is all about luxury, offering some of the best rooms in the city, exceptional facilities, and some of the finest views of the iconic Chicago skyline. Make no mistake, this is an upmarket destination catered to guests with money to burn. However, if you’re prepared to spend a little extra, you’ll be well rewarded when checking in at The Langham.

Room Details

There are plenty of room options at The Langham. If you’re working with a limited budget, your best bet is to choose something from the Deluxe lineup of rooms. The most basic room option here is a Deluxe. Although these rooms are on the small side, they’re kitted out in stylish mid-century decor. What’s more, the ensuite bathrooms are out of this world. Rainfall showers and freestanding tubs come as standard, while double vanity units make these rooms ideal for couples. Although the most basic option at The Langham, a double room isn’t cheap. If you’re looking to make a last-minute booking, expect to pay in the region of $550 for an overnight stay.

If you want a slight upgrade, think about booking a Deluxe Premier room. You’ll benefit from a bit more square footage, but the main draw of these elevated rooms is the view. With floor-to-ceiling windows, you’ll be able to take a break from nocturnal activities and soak in the city lights. If you want a hotel room with a view of the Chicago River, expect to pay an average of $740 per night. All Deluxe rooms are equipped with full double beds, although some rooms also feature King size beds.

There’s also a good range of suites at The Langham. A Junior Suite is the most affordable option, although a single night will set you back around $1,055. Most of the other suites available at The Langham cater to larger groups, which isn’t really practical if it’s just the two of you. However, you’ll find one-bedroom suites offering stunning views of Lake Michigan. If you want to really indulge, an overnight stay in a suite like this will cost around $1,760 per night.

Spa Facilities and Premium Experiences

When it comes to spa facilities and amenities, The Langham does not disappoint. There’s an on-site sauna and health club, along with an indoor swimming pool and whirlpool. If you don’t feel like venturing too far from your bed, you can also take advantage of in-room spa treatments and massage services.

Looking for dining options? The Langham Hotel has a couple of dining establishments for you to take advantage of. The Travelle restaurant offers seasonal American cuisine throughout the week. Although you’ll find breakfast, brunch, lunch, and dinner all served here, menu availability varies depending on the day. What’s more, you’ll need to reserve a table if you want to sit down for dinner during the weekend.

For more laid-back dining, head to Pavillion. This trendy space operates on Saturdays and Sundays, offering up light bites and an afternoon tea service. If you’re booking a last-minute stay, you might not have time to reserve a table ahead of time. Thankfully, The Langham offers private dining experiences to guests with a healthier budget.

Room Service and Extras

If your schedule leaves little else for sex, you’re probably not going to be able to make it down for lunch or dinner during your stay. Thankfully, The Langham offers round-the-clock room service to paying guests. The 24-hour room service menu is surprisingly extensive, giving you access to premium eats and a pretty generous drinks selection. Naturally, this doesn’t come cheap, but it’s well worth paying a premium for the convenience.

Location

This skyscraper hotel enjoys a prime location. Situated at 330 North Wabash Avenue, The Langham lies within the New Eastside district of the Windy City. You’re just a short walk from city landmarks like Millenium Park, the American Writers Museum, and Willis Tower. Need to rely on public transport during your stay? You’ll find several “L” train stations within walking distance of the hotel lobby.

JW Marriott Chicago

JW Marriott Chicago

Planning a stay in Chicago’s historic downtown district? The JW Marriot Chicago is the perfect place to call home during your trip to the city. This is one of the most popular hotels in the Windy City, and it’s not hard to see why. Aside from an excellent location, there’s a huge variety of room and suite options to choose from. What’s more, there are excellent spa facilities and in-house services to make your stay one you’ll remember for a long time to come.

Room Details

Thinking about paying a visit with your latest mistress? A great stay starts with the right room. Thankfully, there’s a range of affordable options for cheaters looking to camp out in style in Chicago. If you’re on a budget, a standard King room is your best bet. With high ceilings and plenty of square footage, they’re the perfect base of operations for a dirty weekend away.

Each room comes equipped with a King size bed that’s perfect for passionate nights under the sheets. Meanwhile, the ensuite bathroom facilities are excellent. Decked out in marble, each bathroom includes double vanity counters and an oversized bathtub, not to mention a separate shower. What’s a single night in a JW Marriott King going to set you back? Book early enough and you should be able to secure a room for as little as $540 per night.

Thinking about splashing out on a suite? A one-bedroom suite might be the way to go. The main perk of this room type is more square footage and a bigger bathroom. If you’re staying for more than a couple of nights, it might be worth forking out for the premium. However, if you’re looking to save a few bucks, an upgraded King room might be a better option. For as little as $665 per night, you’ll enjoy larger rooms, better views, and, most importantly, exclusive access to the JW Marriott Executive Lounge.

Spa Facilities and Premium Experiences

The best Chicago hotels don’t skimp when it comes to spa services. The JW Marriott Chicago is no different. There’s a huge menu of spa treatments and pampering services on offer here. You can schedule an in-room massage, with standards including deep tissue and CBD massage treatments. There are also some great value spa packages to take advantage of, granting you access to on-site facilities and five-star extras. This hotel also caters to couples, with a limited menu of couple experiences that are just the thing for getting warmed up for an evening of no-strings sex.

Looking for nearby dining venues? The JW Marriott Chicago has got you covered. Reviver is the place to be if you’re looking for late-night cocktails and small bites. There’s also an impressive lunch and dinner menu to delve into. The Lobby Lounge is another good option if you’re short on ideas and don’t want to stray too far from your room. This is a casual establishment, although the quality of the food won’t disappoint. If you’re looking for fine dining experiences, head to The Florentine. Located on the 2nd floor of the JW Marriott Chicago building, you’ll find a restaurant menu bursting with the best of authentic Italian cuisine.

Room Service and Extras

If your schedule is tight, you probably won’t have much time for restaurant reservations. Fortunately, the JW Marriott Chicago caters to guests who don’t fancy budging from their beds. This hotel offers an in-room dining menu that puts most room service offerings to shame. Although you’ll be able to enjoy far more variety than a typical room service menu, bear in mind that in-room dining isn’t offered at all hours of the day. Service starts at 6 am, with final orders accepted at 11 pm. However, if you’re staying for a couple of days or are a returning guest, you may have a little leeway.

Location

This five-star hotel doesn’t disappoint when it comes to location. It’s situated in the heart of Chicago’s iconic downtown district. There are countless restaurants, museums, and landmarks within walking distance. What’s more, there’s a bustling nightlife scene surrounding this hotel. If you’re driving into the city, you should be able to secure a parking spot nearby. However, there are excellent public transport links nearby to make your life easier.

The Ritz-Carlton

The Ritz-Carlton

Looking for a central hotel to play host to a dirty weekend? The Ritz-Carlton is one of the best hotel choices in Chicago. Situated in the downtown district with superb views of Lake Michigan, this five-star destination remains popular with business travelers and pleasure-seekers alike. It’s not the cheapest hotel in the city, but if you’re looking for luxurious extras, incredible rooms, and unbeatable service, there are few better options.

Room Details

Every room option at The Ritz-Carlton screams luxury. You’ve got a choice between a Lake View or a City View room when staying at this Chicago hotel. Neither room option is particularly large, but you do benefit from spacious beds and floor-to-ceiling windows that deliver spectacular views of one of North America’s most legendary cities.

Both room types are also equipped with marble bathrooms. Expect all the amenities of a five-star stay here. One thing to keep in mind is that The Ritz-Carlton goes above and beyond when it comes to housekeeping. Expect at least two visits from the maid every day. If you plan on staying in a state of constant undress during your stay, make sure you’re using that do not disturb sign. Room rates vary slightly depending on the season, but don’t expect to spend anything less than $720 on a single night.

Thinking about a suite? The Ritz-Carlton has a few choice options. Take your stay up a notch and book a night or two at the Gold Coast Suite. Bigger beds, better views, and extended square footage come as standard here. There’s also a separate dining area, making it perfect for couples who don’t want to spend too much time outside of the bed. What’s the damage? A suite can easily set you back three times the rate of a standard room. However, if you’re thinking about spending a long spell in Chicago, don’t be afraid to ask about special rates.

Spa Facilities and Premium Experiences

This is a premier hotel establishment, so it shouldn’t be too much of a surprise to find a selection of spa facilities available. There’s a large pool for when you need to cool off after an afternoon under the sheets. Meanwhile, a fitness center and sauna are on hand when you need to unwind. In-room spa treatments can also be arranged, but it’s best to call ahead and plan your schedule with concierge services before checking in. You can book things like massages, body wraps, manicures, and more. There’s also an on-site steam room to discover.

If you can bear to tear yourself from the bed during your stay, you don’t have to go far for first-rate dining. The Ritz-Carlton has a couple of great on-site venues offering up delicious cuisine. There’s a rooftop steakhouse restaurant that should cater to carnivorous tastes. Meanwhile, The Cafe is the way to go if you’re looking for a caffeine pick-me-up or lighter dishes. Bear in mind, this hotel is in a really central spot. If the on-site restaurant menus aren’t whetting your appetites, you won’t have to stray far to find more exciting alternatives.

Room Service and Extras

The Ritz-Carlton has one of the best room service menus of any hotel in Chicago. Unlike standard room service lists that lack much in the way of choice, you’ll find a full list of in-room dining options here. If you can’t face getting dressed and heading down to a restaurant, simply dial the front desk and place your order. You can enjoy just about any of The Ritz-Carlton’s signature dishes. What’s more, there’s a full wine list to discover if you’re finding the mini-bar options a bit limited.

Location

The Ritz-Carlton can be found at Water Tower Place. If you’re new to the city, you’ll have no trouble finding this hotel and checking in. If you’re flying in, The Ritz-Carlton is just 10 miles from Midway Airport and a mere 16 miles from O’Hare International Airport. It’s also within walking distance of several Chicago L stations. Once you’re settled in, you’re in a prime location to get out and explore. Dozens of iconic attractions are just minutes away on foot.

The Gwen

The Gwen

Sometimes, it’s worth spending a little more on a hotel stay. Maybe you and your affair partner haven’t had the chance to get away from regular life yet. Perhaps you’re looking to sweeten the deal and secure a weekend filled with sex. Booking a stay at The Gwen is a surefire way of upping your sex game. Although it takes inspiration from the 1930s, this five-star hotel isn’t lacking in contemporary conveniences. Enjoy some of the best accommodations in the city, not to mention jaw-dropping views that will serve as a brilliant backdrop to a hot weekend.

Room Details

The Gwen offers a good selection of guest rooms and suites. You’ll pay a little more for a stay at this hotel, but that minor premium is more than worth it for five-star opulence. For a sex-filled weekend stay, a Superior King is the way to go. Each of these rooms is equipped with a spacious King size bed, not to mention a separate seating area. You’ll also have access to complimentary WiFi and all those basic extras you’d expect from any five-star hotel. The bathrooms are particularly well appointed, with marble interiors and large tubs that are perfect if you’re looking to move the action away from the bed. For a single-night stay, you’re looking at around $505. If you’re after a room with a view, expect to pay a little more than that.

Big spenders can also choose to upgrade to a suite. Unless your bank balance runs into seven figures, the Gwen Lux Suite is probably too expensive for your tastes. If you’re after something more affordable, consider a Superior King Suite. Expect all the same amenities as a Superior King room, with enhanced interiors and more square footage. A major selling point of these suites is that you get access to a private terrace. Perfect for taking a breather, these enclosed terraces are also great if you’re thinking about al fresco nighttime activity. Suite availability is limited, so you’ll need to book well in advance. What’s more, prices can vary wildly. For the best possible price, make sure you’re pointing in a reservation a couple of months before you plan to travel.

Spa Facilities and Premium Experiences

Although The Gwen doesn’t currently have an on-site spa, you can still enjoy premium spa experiences. The hotel currently offers something called the Luxury La Mer Experience. This budget-friendly extra means your other half can pamper themselves with a selection of premium spa products. If you’re looking for something more, speak to the front desk about arranging in-room treatments. However, because these treatments will need to be provided by third-party suppliers, expect to pay a premium.

Thinking about dining options? There are a few good choices at The Gwen. Upstairs at The Gwen is the place to be if you’re looking for rooftop dining and exceptional views. You’ll only find light bites and small plates here, but the drinks menu is second to none. For a more traditional dining experience, there’s Kostali by Naha. Here, you’ll find one of the best menus in Chicago.

Room Service and Extras

As with any good hotel, The Gwen provides guests with a room service option. However, the menu offerings here are fairly limited compared to other hotels we’ve talked about. If you’re only looking for the occasional dish to recharge your batteries in between sex sessions, you shouldn’t be disappointed. However, if you’re after something more substantial, it might be worth forcing yourself into a change of clothes and heading to one of the on-site dining venues. For reference, room service is available from 7 am, right up until 11 pm every evening.

Location

The Gwen is located within the McGraw-Hill Building. This historic complex is situated in the Windy City’s commercial district, meaning you’re in a prime location to get out and explore. If you want to head out for dinner, you’ll find dozens of restaurants and bistros within walking distance. What’s more, the river is right on your doorstep. If you’re driving into town, finding this hotel is easy, while parking can be arranged in advance. If you’re depending on public transport, you’ll benefit from convenient L train connections to points of interest across the city.

Final Thoughts

Keeping an affair under wraps is hard work. Even if you’re managing to keep your other woman a secret, nothing beats getting away from it all and escaping to a five-star hotel. If you’re looking for US destinations, Chicago is an obvious choice. It’s right up there with NYC and, generally speaking, hotel accommodation is far more affordable.

Even if you’ve left it to the last minute, you won’t struggle to find great rates on Chicago hotel rooms. If you can only get away for a single night, a deluxe double shouldn’t set you back much more than $500. If you’re staying for longer and want to get the best return on your investment, it’s always worth shelling out a little more for a suite.

Before you hand over your credit card details, think about what you’ve got planned. Without having to constantly look over your shoulder, you and your other woman can get out and explore. If you’re looking for evening entertainment, make sure you’re checking into a central location with great transport connections. If sex is the only thing you’re thinking about, make sure you’re staying somewhere with excellent on-site amenities and round-the-clock room service.

7 Best Places to Cheat on Your Spouse Without Leaving A Trace

Best Places to Cheat on Your Spouse

Thinking about cheating on your spouse? Whether you’re browsing dating sites for no strings attached casual sex or looking to entertain multiple extramarital affairs, you’ll need to think carefully about venues to avoid getting caught. Both men and women cheat and, for most marriages, infidelity is the only thing that keeps a relationship going. However, should your cheating come to light, you can look forward to a world of pain.

The good news is that it’s pretty easy to keep your affair a secret. Provided you’re selecting the best places to cheat on your spouse, you can carry on enjoying casual sex for months, if not years. From afternoon sex sessions at a friend’s house to dirty weekends in a motel with a stranger online, there’s no shortage of options when it comes to cheating locales. Need some inspiration to keep your indiscretions a secret?

Read on for everything you need to know.

Use a Friend’s House

Use a Friend's House

When carrying on an affair, many of us try to keep our cheating as secret as possible. However, it’s not a bad idea to bring a trusted friend in on the ruse to broaden your options. This is particularly true if you’re looking for the perfect place to have no strings sex without your partner finding out.

Do you have a close friend or coworker you trust completely? Think about using their place as a location for cheating. If your friend is particularly relaxed about the issue, you’re in luck. You can pick up last-minute squeezes on a dating site and head over to have fun in private. Ideally, you’ll want to use a friend’s house that’s not overflowing with roommates. The fewer witnesses to your affairs, the less likely it is you’re going to get caught out.

It’s also a good idea to pick a friend who’s been in the same situation as you. While a trusted friend is unlikely to ever sell you down the river, there’s always the chance your friendship could hit the rocks in the future. To avoid a scenario where they can spill your secrets and derail your marriage, pick a friend with who you’ll have mutual collateral.

Book a Motel / Hotel

use a motel

If friends are a no-go, there’s always the option of booking a motel. For many married people carrying on an affair, motels are without doubt one of the best places to cheat on your spouse. They’re cheap, easy to book, and you won’t have to worry about a motel clerk or maid running their mouths off to your other half.

However, it’s not as simple as booking a motel room and penciling in a time for a hookup. Ultimately, you’ll need to be smart when using a motel as your base of operations.

If you’re a married man who travels regularly for work, a motel is an ideal place for casual sex and last-minute hookups. A motel is also a good bet if your wife is away, but you don’t want to run the risk of a nosy neighbor blowing your cover.

Even if you’re using a discreet motel, always make sure it’s situated a fair distance from your home. The last thing you want is a casual acquaintance or a colleague of your spouse spotting you pulling into a motel parking lot and raising questions. A few extra driving miles are more than worth it for the peace of mind it will bring.

Make Sure Your Motel Charges Remain a Secret

Worried about spending too much money on an affair? Motels are an inexpensive choice. Although you won’t find too many places offering by-the-hour room rates nowadays, most motels offer budget rates that won’t break the bank. However, bear in mind that most locations will only accept credit cards. If you’re worried about paper trails, this can prove a problem.

Never use a shared account credit card to book rooms for affairs. Instead, seek out a prepaid credit card as an alternative. If you’re using a secret card, make sure you’re only receiving electronic statements. Alternatively, ensure all your mail is being rerouted to a P.O. box your spouse does not know about.

Use Your Car

Use Your Car

If you’ve ever enjoyed a late-night tryst in the back of a car, you’ll know it’s the most practical place to have sex. However, if you’re short on places to cheat, it can be a good option. Using your vehicle as a mobile base of operations for cheating has plenty of advantages.

For starters, the only thing you’ll have to explain to an eagle-eyed spouse is your mileage. If they’re not a driver themselves, this is unlikely to even come up in conversation. Provided you’re keeping the gas tank full and you’re not leaving any evidence behind in the back seat, you’re all good.

Admittedly, the back seat isn’t the best place for an hours-long sex session. However, if you’re looking for an impromptu place to blow your load after a late-night hookup, you could do a lot worse. If you’re browsing dating sites for sex-only meets or using escorts, nobody’s going to turn their nose up when you suggest using your car as a venue.

Obviously, a few basic rules need to be followed. For starters, avoid parking up in plain sight. Aside from the outside chance of someone you know passing by, you could fall foul of law enforcement and find yourself slapped with an indecent exposure chance. A secluded parking lot, or better still, an out-of-the-way rest spot is your best bet.

Using Your Own Home

This is a particularly risky venture for anyone who cheats regularly. However, if you’re sensible about things, using your own place can make life a lot easier.

Ultimately, you should only be using your own place to host your cheating partner if there’s no other option. You’ll need to be sure you’re not going to be bothered. If you share your home with a spouse, this means waiting until they’re out of the house for at least several hours. However, don’t assume you can get your business done and dispose of any evidence before they get home from the office. For peace of mind, it’s better to wait until they’re going to be away from home for several days. Wait until they’re away visiting family or enjoying a vacation with friends.

Even then, you’ll need to be careful to keep up appearances. If your spouse calls the house to check in on things, don’t let the phone ring out. If there’s a knock at the door from a casual acquaintance or family member, make sure you’re answering to give the impression that everything is normal. Your aim here is to limit suspicion. Anything that might raise a red flag should be avoided.

Use Their House

Don’t want to take the risk of getting caught out in your own home? Why not use their place instead? Although not always ideal, using the home of your cheating partner limits any chance of your spouse finding out what’s going on.

Try and avoid rocking up to a stranger’s home after meeting them online. You’ll want to build up a clear picture of who you’re dealing with before diving straight in. A busy house or apartment packed with kids or roommates should be avoided. Besides not being a great atmosphere for carrying on an affair, you’re asking for trouble with all those potential witnesses. For a fuss-free life, only use the home of an affair partner if they’re single and unattached.

At the end of the day, using someone else’s home is something you should only consider once you’ve built up a casual relationship with them. You’ll need to be able to trust no husband or ex is lingering about. What’s more, if you notice any signs your affair partner has growing feelings for you, they could even be filming your rendezvous to blackmail you. Being able to hot-tail it to someone else’s apartment for casual sex might seem convenient, but it can lead to all manner of hell in the long run.

Other Venues for Casual Sex

If you’re only interested in one-off encounters, you can be a little more creative when it comes to cheating venues. If you have little trouble hooking up on a night out, a club restroom is always a last resort for a casual encounter. Just make sure you’re not socializing with any friends or colleagues who are likely to gossip about what you’ve been up to.

Do you visit the gym regularly? This is another great place for picking up casual sex partners. If you’re visiting late at night, there will be fewer people around, leaving you with plenty of opportunities to get down and dirty without being disturbed.

Best Dating Sites for Finding a Cheating Partner

Being On Tinder

There’s no point considering venues for an affair if you haven’t yet singled out a cheating partner. Thankfully, there’s no shortage of places you can pick up someone for no strings sex or something more serious.

Looking for a huge pool of eager partners? Ashley Madison is one of the best affair platforms on the internet. This site caters to both men and women, making it easy for sex-starved singles and married people alike to find someone on the same page (Become an Ashley Madison Power User: Tips and Tricks).

For casual encounters, there’s Adult Friend Finder. With millions of users in dozens of countries, you’ll be able to find willing cheating partners in no time at all. It’s a little expensive, but if you want to cut through the crap and secure a no-strings-attached arrangement, this platform is the way to go.

If you’re after a dating site that puts a premium on discretion, Illicit Encounters should appeal. This site boasts plenty of useful features that make it easy to keep your identity concealed until you’re ready to nail down a meeting with a new partner. See our tips and tricks for Illicit Encounters here.

If you use our system, Tinder can also be a good option, but you definately need to have a cover story.

The good thing about all of these sites is that you’ll find no shortage of like-minded people who see nothing wrong in extramarital affairs and casual sex. What’s more, you’ll be able to keep invaluable suggestions on the best places to cheat on your spouse.

To keep your activities a secret, make sure you’re using a secret account or prepaid credit card to pay for any service subscriptions. If you’re making a lot of calls or sending messages to potential meets, it’s also a good idea to invest in a burner phone that’s not going to fall into the hands of your other half.

Picking the Perfect Place to Cheat

At the end of the day, you need to consider the kind of sex partner you’re seeking before you settle on a venue for casual sex. Are you looking to make casual connections for one-off sex sessions? You can use their place in a pinch, but for peace of mind and maximum discretion, it’s probably best to bite the bullet and book a motel room.

Want maximum mobility? Use your vehicle. This way, you can drive as far as you need to pick up a potential squeeze. What’s more, provided you park up in a secluded rest stop, there’s zero chance of anyone finding out what you’re up to.

As a rule, try and avoid using your own place to host sex partners. Even if your spouse is away for long periods, there’s always the chance they will turn up unannounced. This is even more likely if you’ve not been careful to cover your tracks in the past and they’ve already sniffed a rat.

Alternatively, think about turning to a friend or acquaintance you can trust. Do you know someone who’s pretty relaxed about extramarital affairs? Speak to them about using their place as a venue. However, just be careful about keeping those friendships on track. You don’t want a minor falling out about something trivial to turn into a relationship-ending revelation.

If you’re traveling away from home, you have a little more freedom. A holiday with friends provides you with the perfect opportunity to get down with strangers and fulfill your fantasies. However, approach with caution. Your other half is likely going to be on high alert, even if they’re thousands of miles away. Be prepared for an inquisition upon your return home and keep suspicions to a minimum by answering your phone whenever they call. Finally, make sure your alibis are always rock solid.

What is Micro-Cheating?

What is Micro-Cheating?

For many people in a committed relationship, cheating doesn’t actually have to involve casual sex or full blown infidelity. Micro-cheating, or emotional cheating as some call it, can be just as catastrophic for a relationship. If you’re thinking about carrying out an affair, you’ll need to get a handle on what counts as micro cheating. It can often be a case where you meet someone and it’s a right person, wrong time situation.

Even a minor indication of emotional cheating could land you in hot water with your other half. Once they spot micro cheating behaviors, they’re more likely to single out other behaviors that will give away your status as a full-blown cheat. Want to avoid a messy divorce or ending up in couples counseling? Read on for everything you need to know about micro cheating so you can stop yourself from heading down a slippery slope.

Are You Guilty of Micro-Cheating?

Are You Guilty of Micro-Cheating?

What defines micro cheating? Forget what you know about physical cheating and conventional affairs. As far as micro cheating and emotional infidelity are concerned, it’s all about the little things.

Most of the time, micro-cheaters aren’t actually guilty of physically focused acts. Generally speaking, micro-cheating involves anything that varies beyond social norms. This can include establishing an emotional connection that goes beyond a social connection, increased levels of physical contact, or any behaviors that veer toward the sexual. Micro-cheating typically involves behavior that has the potential to boil over into physical infidelity in the future.

It’s a fairly new phenomenon. The internet age and the rise in smartphone usage have opened up the floodgates for micro-cheating. Nowadays, it’s all too easy for would-be cheaters to send texts or social media messages to people they’re not in a relationship with. Many of us consider these interactions harmless, but this is all down to the anonymity of these exchanges.

Is it the Same as Emotional Infidelity?

Although emotional cheating and micro-cheating are often used interchangeably, relationship experts and dating coaches have differing opinions on these two terms. Emotional intimacy is a world apart from full blown cheating, but if you’re doing it away from your primary relationship, it’s still considered a big no no.

Generally speaking, this style of cheating never strays into physical territory. However, the emotional connection established with another person can involve more intimacy than in a sex-only situation. Nonetheless, a micro cheat engaging in emotional intimacy with another person has the potential to pursue a more physical relationship in the future.

Signs of a Micro Cheater

What constitutes micro cheating ultimately depends on your relationship status and what your other half considers acceptable. If your partner is pretty relaxed about things, you don’t have to worry too much about how to prevent micro cheating. However, if your relationship involves clear boundaries, you’ll need to be careful not to abuse your partner’s trust. Or rather, not be found out as a micro cheat.

Signs of a micro cheat include downloading multiple dating or hookup apps without your other half knowing. You might also be crossing the line when it comes to complimenting friends or colleagues. Letting others know what you find attractive about them or taking liberties with physical contact are also telltale signs of a micro cheat.

If you’re a social media user, becoming fixated on a stranger’s profile can also put you in the micro cheat camp. This is especially true if you’re putting in extra effort to reply to messages or comment on updates. You might also be going the extra mile to impress the object of your affections. Maybe you’re dressing differently to turn heads, or investing more time in another person than your actual partner.

Some micro cheats tend to fixate on previous partners. Are you guilty of spending hours trawling through an ex’s photo gallery? Have you been checking in on past romances with occasional texts and messages? If you want to avoid landing yourself in marriage counseling, nip this in the bud or at least up your guard. Deleting text exchanges is the best advice here, but you’ll need to ensure you’re not rousing suspicion by being overly secretive.

Micro-Cheating and Casual Relationships

Micro-Cheating and Casual Relationships

You might think you can get away with just about anything in a casual relationship. However, micro cheating can be just as devastating for casual relationships as for long-standing marriages.

While casual relationships provide you with free rein to pursue sex with other partners outside of your primary relationships, the secretive nature of micro cheating can land you in hot water. The emotional investment you’re throwing at those clandestine communications is only going to cause you trouble in the long run. Remember, in a no-strings relationship, there’s no such thing as full blown infidelity. An honest conversation is all it takes to let your main partner know you’re playing away from home.

Is Your Other Half Guilty of Emotional Cheating?

Worried your partner might be engaging in micro cheating? The good news is that this type of behavior is fairly easy to spot. If your other half has become distant and disengaged, take this as a sign that their attention may be focused elsewhere. Sometimes, there may be a good reason for this behavior change. However, if your partner has previously been fairly attentive, micro cheating may be the culprit.

A change in appearance is another strong indicator of infidelity. For women, this might include upping their game when it comes to makeup. For men, a less drastic change in appearance can be taken as a sign. It’s not just wardrobe and makeup you need to look out for. If your partner is suddenly a lot more wary about their physical appearance, they may be heading to the gym or hitting the track far more than they might have done previously. That said the gym is also a great place to pickup women. 

Again, consider whether this behavior change has come out of the blue. If your partner has candidly discussed not being happy about their appearance, a new workout routine or glow-up shouldn’t be cause for concern. However, if the change has come out of nowhere, they’re more than likely trying to impress someone outside of the home.

It’s also worth keeping an eye on how they’re interacting with their phone or tablet. Are they keeping their phone out of view? This could be a sign they’re worried about messages appearing on their screen that you might spot. Have they recently changed their passcode? Are they making a habit of deleting messages as soon as they’ve read them? This level of secrecy is a strong indicator they’re trying to keep something secret.

Is Micro-Cheating Always a Cause for Concern?

Micro cheating isn’t necessarily something to worry about. If both partners are pretty confident in the strength of a relationship, harmless flirting doesn’t have to make anyone feel uncomfortable or land anyone in hot water. However, you’ll need to be clear on what actually counts as harmless flirting.

Casual flirting that doesn’t stray into micro cheating territory should only ever be done in front of a partner. Furthermore, there are limits to what you can say and do to prevent you and your spouse from ending up in couples therapy. Avoid loaded innuendos or anything overtly sexual. What’s more, limit this type of interaction to people you’ve not had any romantic history with. Even an old friend is a no-go.

Additionally, make sure you’re not targeting a single individual with too much of this type of attention. It’s also a good idea to avoid things like extended eye contact or various forms of physical contact.

Does Micro-Cheating Always Lead to Physical Cheating?

Although harmless in most cases, micro-cheating definitely has the potential to turn into something more serious. If you’re actively trying to initiate an affair, micro cheating is an effective way to test the waters. If you are using micro cheating as a litmus test, be careful about where you’re doing it.

A full blown affair should be carried out well away from the marital home or your main relationship. Micro-cheating at the office is all well and good if you’re after casual attention or the odd compliment. However, an ongoing sexual affair with a co-worker is going to be hard to keep secret in the long run.

If you are using micro cheating to stoke something more serious, target your attention further afield. Social media channels minimize the chance of partners or close friends finding out what you’re up to. For maximum peace of mind, stick to dating sites and sex hookup platforms to connect with like-minded individuals who are on the same page. If you are using dating sites and affair networks, only use platforms that provide you with tools to conceal your identity until you’re ready to share more personal details (Navigate the Platform Like a Pro: Ashley Madison Tips).

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Micro-Cheating Behaviors to Avoid

If you’re eager to engage in micro cheating, but want to avoid being found out, there are several behaviors you need to get a handle on. Most of the time, micro cheats will need to use their phones to communicate. If you’re using social media or text-based platforms to indulge your micro cheating needs, make sure your device usage isn’t raising any red flags. Avoid becoming fixated on your smartphone unless you want to answer awkward questions.

If your behavior is challenged, never take a defensive stance. You don’t have to be completely upfront and admit to what you’re doing, but closing off and dismissing your other half is only going to stoke the fires. Have a casual excuse lined up in the chamber you can use when needed.

If your micro cheating falls into sexting territory, you’re clearly crossing into infidelity territory. If you want to continue these interactions, you’ll need to up your game to keep your interactions a secret. A burner phone is an absolute must. Keep this secondary device a complete secret from your partner and make sure there is no paper trail. If you need to pay for a call plan, do so from a prepaid credit card or anonymous e-wallet. A single paper statement landing in your mailbox will instantly give the game away.

What Causes Micro-Cheating?

Even if you’re not actually entertaining the idea of having a full blown affair, you may still find yourself engaging in micro-cheating. Why? Well, there’s more than one reason why men and women engage in this kind of behavior.

Perhaps you’ve been married for many years or attached to the same person for a long time. Many of us tied down to the same partner for long enough tend to struggle with our sense of identity. You might be feeling like your individuality is slipping away or that you’re having to repress parts of yourself. Micro cheating provides an easy and relatively harmless outlet that can help us recapture a sense of identity. Sending an occasional flirtatious message via social media or removing a wedding ring before heading out for a night on the town are small acts of rebellion. A positive social media response or moment of sexual attention from a stranger can do wonders for our self-esteem.

Although a healthy outlet for some people in relationships, micro cheating can become addictive. The rise in social media has made this even more of a problem. If your spouse is noticing a change in your behavior, it’s probably time to limit your interactions with strangers and casual acquaintances. If you find yourself experiencing withdrawal symptoms, take this as a sign that your micro cheating behaviors have drifted into addictive behavior territory.

There are other signs to watch out for. Are you turning to social media to satiate your micro cheating urges after a fight with your partner? This is a red flag that your micro-cheating is following an addiction pattern, rather than something more casual. Are friends and colleagues commenting on the connections you’re making with strangers? If these people are observing your behavior and commenting on it, your other half is bound to follow suit.

Should You Admit to Micro-Cheating?

This is a thorny issue. If your other half has become suspicious of your actions and you think the subject is going to be raised, it’s worth getting everything out in the open before things boil over. In many cases, minor acts of micro cheating aren’t going to derail a marriage or lead to the end of a relationship. However, continued secrecy is going to cause you all manner of problems.

If you do find yourself having to explain your behavior, use it as an opportunity to establish relationship boundaries with your other half. Don’t outright admit to having done anything wrong. Instead, reframe the conversation. Talk about how the relationship has clearly evolved and now’s the time to discuss new boundaries that both parties are happy with. If you’re feeling as though your partner is throwing the blame squarely in your court, consider bringing up a few things you’re unhappy with. Micro-cheating is generally harmless, but accepting blame at this point is going to leave you ripe for criticism in the future.

At this point, some couples may actually find they’re both happy to open up their relationship to new experiences. If you’ve been micro cheating to satiate a growing need for action outside of your primary relationship, now might be time to discuss branching out into a polyamorous scenario. However, be incredibly cautious when it comes to raising this topic. Unless you’re completely confident that your partner has a similar desire, just touching on the issue can trigger a breakup.

How Common is Micro-Cheating?

Infidelity is more common than you might think. Around 12% of married women have admitted to having sex at least once with someone other than their spouse. For married men, the number is almost twice that. However, micro cheating is far more commonplace. In fact, depending on what you consider counts as micro cheating, just about everyone might be guilty of it in some way.

Can You Get Away with Micro-Cheating?

Can You Get Away with Micro-Cheating?

If you’re bored with your current relationship and want to spice things up a little, micro cheating can be a rewarding outlet. Furthermore, it’s a relatively victimless crime. It’s not as loaded as a physical affair and, provided you’re reining things in with your online exchanges and interactions, there’s a strong argument that you’re not actually doing anything wrong.

However, before you start sliding DMs into strangers’ inboxes, think about the state of your current relationship. Are you involved with someone whose default setting is to be highly suspicious? Micro cheating is likely to land you in as much hot water as a full blown affair. Harmless flirting or a casual compliment might seem minor to you, but if your partner sees the red flags of infidelity everywhere, these tiny things can become major obstacles to your relationship.

Thankfully, keeping micro-cheating a secret is fairly straightforward. You can reserve all of your interactions to social media or online-only platforms. Although you’ll need to be careful about sending and reading messages, you can limit your texting and calls to outside of the home. For complete peace of mind, a burner phone is a solid investment and will save you a world of hurt.

Fortunate enough to be in an open relationship? Just because you have the green light to have sex with other people, doesn’t mean it’s open season when it comes to micro cheating. For many people in open relationships, micro-cheating is more problematic than it would be for married couples. Be open and upfront about your pursuit of new partners. After all, you’re in a pretty lucky situation where no-strings sex is not just acceptable but expected. Remember to check out our piece on the best places to cheat and not get found out.

When Affairs Turn Into Love | A Cautionary Tale

When Affairs Turn Into Love

I’d love to sit here and act like I move from girlfriend to girlfriend without emotion. I really would. In fact, I wish I was like that. Sadly, I’m not built that way. It’s a major flaw in my personality, that sometimes, when I like someone a lot, I can fall for them. In fact, it turns me on when they fall for me too. And to make matters worse, I take the breakups very badly. It can take me months to get over.

When Affairs Turn To Love

Planning the Duration of the Date

Last year, I fell head over heels in love with the lady I was seeing. She was beautiful, kind and funny. She too had a great job and was an amazing mum. Everything about her was simply perfect. We’d talk for hours and every time we’d meet-up, just being near her was electric. We couldn’t get enough of each other. I thought it was just a crush to begin with, but when I noticed she had feelings back, it ended up leading to a full blown affair.

Now this particular lady had never had an affair before, which added to the excitement, and she’d constantly be asking me what was normal and what wasn’t in the affair world. I specifically remember her asking me

what happens when you start falling for someone…

Before she could even finish the sentence, I replied

I love you. I’m totally and completely in love with you.

Thankfully she said the same back, and we went on for a few months feeling like we were floating on cloud 9. Occasionally, she would ring me up crying as it was all getting a little too overwhelming. And of course sometimes if we didn’t get give each other enough attention we’d fight.

But as much as I loved her with every fibre of my body, I started to get scared. I realised that she was the type of woman I could leave my wife for – and she was thinking of leaving her husband. We both knew deep down it couldn’t happen, but it didn’t stop us wanting it.

This situation was not ideal. And the more we couldn’t do what we wanted to, the more it just lead to more and more arguments to the point that it broke us apart. We both said things that we couldn’t take back, and it ended in a way where we could never speak again. We blocked each other on WhatsApp, Instagram and Facebook. There was no going back.

Once in a while, I’d look at her instagram from a dummy account, but all I felt was a combination of anger and hatred for her. When the truth is it wasn’t her I was angry at. It was the situation. And as much as her and I were good together – perhaps us actually being together, with children logistics and divorce cases, was just something that neither of us would ever want to go through. Her amazing personality and good looks didn’t help – and I’d keep asking myself if I’d ever meet someone as good again.

I lost a best friend and a girlfriend all in one go. And for the first time in my life, it made me realise why and how men would leave their wives for their lovers. Caught up in emotion, it’s easily done!

I always promised myself that I’d never put myself in a situation where I leave my wife and not see my 3 kids everyday. It would break all 4 of them, but mostly the kids.

Was I really that selfish?

I just never expected to find myself so deep in love! This was a first.

I still think about her almost everyday, and it’s taken every part of me to stop looking at her instagram stories, and keeping some sort of tabs on her. It just wasn’t and isn’t healthy.

Like I said at the beginning of this post, I’d love to sit here and act like I move from girlfriend to girlfriend without emotion. And most of the time that’s been the case. But this time it wasn’t and it’s jarred me. It’s been one of the most ecstatic and frightening experiences  I’ve had to date.

When Affairs Turn Into Love – My Takeaway

Challenges of An Open Marriage

And as you can probably tell, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about this. Perhaps an unhealthy amount of time reflecting. The truth is you can’t legislate your feelings. But I wish I had nipped it in the bud earlier, or I wish she had. We both got in too deep, and once we admitted we fell in love with each other, alarm bells should have been going off! And they didn’t and for that I’m angry at myself. I’m angry I lost control, I lost common sense and I lost some level of reality.

We had somehow fooled ourselves into thinking we could keep a lid on this, and continue together for years and years. But we couldn’t. And it broke us both. And right now, I’d do anything to hold her, hug her and kiss her again, anything. But what good would come of that? Nothing. Just more confusion, more pain and more hurt!

I don’t know how common it is for men who have affairs and  fall in love with their affair partners. It’s not something I can ask people, and even if I could, we’re all a bunch of alpha males who wouldn’t admit it to each other. But the beauty about a blog like this is that I can admit it to you!

My Advice

My advice is such; if you find yourself in a similar position to myself, and you find yourself falling head over heels in love, believe you me – it’s better to pull the handbrake than to dive in! Take it from me, the pain and the arguments and the hurt, simply isn’t worth it!

As a keen poker player, I realise it’s hard to walk away from a winning hand – but it’s these types of errors that get people caught! Trust me. And this isn’t as clear cut as poker, my definition of winning hand is truly a losing hand.

Whilst some of us do what we do, it’s still and always will be family first, and no matter what, nothing or no-one will ever change that.

2 Methods On How To Pickup Married Women In The Gym

How To Pickup Women In The Gym

I was working out with a friend of mine the other day at the gym. I usually like to train alone but for some reason had got dragged along by him. About 30 seconds into walking in, I was focused on my workout, whilst his eyes and mind was everywhere but on the machines. He was staring at all the married women, and smiling at them in vain. At one point, he even went over and approached a couple of them and got shot down within seconds.

It was embarrassing.

Nonetheless, I continued with my workout, whilst he continued to get shot down time and time again. It got to the stage where I didn’t even want to be seen with him. I just put my music up super loud and pretended I didn’t know him. I just sensed, that I’d be guilty by association.

He pretended to do a workout, and would keep lifting ridiculously heavy weights in an attempt to get women’s attention, and despite being good looking and having a good physique, he came across looking like both a perv and a freak!

I rushed through my routine and went to the jacuzzi to relax. I was praying he wouldn’t join me there. I figured, if he came there and continued to hit on women, I’d have no place to hide (except underwater).

Luckily for me it was late, it was a Sunday, and I was the only guy in there. Lo and behold he joined me and I had to ask:

Buddy, what the fuck was all that about?

This guy was madly obsessed with the book The Game and all things PUA. He told me he had read some article online about how to pickup women in the gym and wanted to test some of the advice he had gotten. I told him to send me the link and later that night, I read the article. It was terrible.

The advice was so bad and had clearly been written by someone who had picked up one woman one time, and perhaps in a place like California where everyone was so friendly. But there’s no way it would have worked in cities like New York or London, where women generally have their guards up (for good reason).

I felt he needed some better advice. He did well with women whilst out and about but for obvious reasons, he would keep failing in the gym over and over again.

His failed and embarrassing futile attempts, coupled with the fact that I did ok with women from my gym, encouraged me to write this very article. I almost feel it’s a public service…..

Why (Married) Women Go To The Gym

Hit the Gym

For those of you who think picking up women in the gym is a good idea, I’d ask that you take a moment to just think about why they come to the gym in the first place. Given that I know and speak to plenty of women, and can only talk from my experience, I can tell you that women go to the gym for one or more of the following reasons:

Lose Weight / Tone / Maintain

Let’s start with the obvious. Women, like many guys, go to the gym to look after their bodies. Whether they’re looking to lose weight with some cardio, maintain their physique, get back into shape or just tone up – the gym is an obvious place to start. With a combination of machines and classes, where better to go to achieve this.

Feel Good

There’s no denying, the rush of serotonin after a workout is almost addictive. You feel so good after some training that it sets you up for the rest of the day. Your confidence goes through the roof, your skin glows and overall you feel amazing. Which woman wouldn’t want that.

The Social Aspect

Some of the women I know come to the gym just to be around people. Whether it’s training around strangers or working out with their friends – there’s something quite social about working out in a gym and not at home.

What Married Women Are Not Looking For In The Gym

From the conversations I’ve had with women from my gym, what they are not looking for is to be hit on. The gym is meant to be a safe space for them to workout. In fact, many of the women I’ve spoken to are always in a rush. They don’t have all day to hang about and squeeze their 45 – 60 minute workout in so they can get back to their day as quickly as possible. Some of them wear minimal makeup, their hair is all over the place – and they couldn’t care less because getting hit on is the last thing they’d want happening to them.

And let’s be honest, if married women wanted to be hit on, there’s a million other places, like a bar, where they could go and be swarmed. But the gym is meant to be a safe space and the last thing they want is for men (even good looking, ripped guys) ogling them or interrupting their rushed workout.

They’re also not stupid, they know plenty of guys have crushes on them, but is that really their problem? No

How To Pickup Married Women In The Gym

Whilst I’m no expert and only do some dating coaching, I’ve certainly had some amazing affairs and relationships from women that I’ve met in the gym. However none of them stemmed from harassing women on the gym floor. That said, I have developed 2 systems that work well for me. Method 1 is more of a long shot and works some of the time but I found that Method 2 has a higher probability of working more of the time.

Method 1 – Using Instagram

In all gyms, it’s not just the guys who stand around in front of mirrors taking pictures of themselves. If you keep your eyes peeled, there’ll also be a handful of women taking photos of themselves too.

Why you may ask?

Sure, some of them are tracking their progress and using it to see how well they’ve done, but more often than not – it’s for social media, namely Instagram. And what do these women do once they’ve taken a picture for Instagram? They of course post it but they also tag their gym.

So I would check my gym daily, to see which women had tagged it as a location, follow them and start approaching them online. Now I wouldn’t be as sleazy as sliding into their DMS, but I’d do a number of things.

I’d say things like:

‘hey, I go to the same gym, I’ve always wanted to come over and say hi but never want to disturb anyone’s workout. Let me know if you’d be up for a coffee at some point.’

OR 

‘hey, I noticed we both go to the same gym. I think I’m hitting a plateau and have been asked to find a workout buddy. Let me know if you think this is something you’d be interested in.’

Now of course, I’d be lying if I said this works all the time. I’d say honestly speaking it would work maybe 25% of the time, but at least it would break the ice, and if nothing else, I’d get a smile and a hello when I saw them on the gym floor the next time. Sometimes maybe even a coffee and on a couple of occasions it led to something more intimate.

It seemed like a softer approach than working straight up to them cold, and it always gave them the easy option to ignore me if they wanted to.

Method 2 – The Apple Watch Method

I think the reason I do better with women more than most is simply because I understand psychology. Cities like London and NYC can be scary places to live in. Women are inherently taught to have their guards up and to break it needs to have a softer more subtle approach. I discovered this method totally by accident.

My boxing instructor told me that I needed to do more cardio outside of boxing sessions. I hate running and I did plenty of skipping at the boxing gym. But in my regular gym I decided to join a spin class.

Given my life, I didn’t necessarily need to be at the gym at the exact same time everyday. Whenever I found myself free, I’d hit the gym. Until of course I stumbled on a spin class at 10am where a hoard of school mums would attend. That for obvious reasons became my regular class 3 days a week. I was only 1 of 4 guys in the class and the rest were women.

Before long, I was a regular fixture and face, and with all of our stats published on a screen in real-time, it wasn’t too hard to walk over to some of the attendees and joke about how they beat me and how I’d better my results the next time. I wasn’t a stranger anymore. I wasn’t some random guy anymore.

I’d never hit on them, but I’d always make a point of saying, hello, goodbye, and perhaps even a self deprecating joke. I’d often ask them for advice, and I was completely congruent when I did, because I genuinely wanted to get better.

But the bit that really changed everything was connecting with those who also wore Apple Watches. Now you may or may not know, but if you wear an Apple Watch, you can automatically share your workout stats with your friends. And so I’d ask the women who wore Apple Watches to share their stats with me, and me with them, in an attempt to stay motivated. To my surprise most of them loved the idea. The beauty was, in order to share their stats with me, they’d have to first give me their number (BINGO!).

And every time they’d finish a workout, it gave me a notification and the perfect excuse to text them and give them the old thumbs up.

Now here’s what I discovered, the women who wrote to me once I finished my workouts, were the most likely to engage in conversations and meet-up outside of the gym.

And once they were willing to do that, I was of course in my element and knew exactly how to turn those casual meet-ups into casual relationships. Ironically, mostly with married women.

Conclusion

In my experience, the women I know want to feel safe in a gym. They don’t want to be hit on there. They want to be hit on when they’re looking their and feeling their best, not when they have no makeup on and are sweaty.

But if you’re anything like my friend and you’re determined to give it a go – try the above 2 methods and contact me to let me know how you get on.

As I said, Method 1 has had some success but Method 2 really does work. I use it all the time.

And even if you don’t get to date them, what’s the worst that’ll happen?

You get fitter, faster and get to workout around some very pretty women. Not a bad consolation prize if you ask me!

3 Secretive Ways How Cheaters Communicate

How Cheaters Communicate

I have this friend of mine, he’s a businessman, and he wishes he could have an affair.

He talks about it all the time. I wouldn’t be surprised if he dreams about it. And whilst he doesn’t have affairs, I know for a fact he sees escorts quite regularly.

He’s on plenty of dating apps but doesn’t use them right and is generally terrible with technology. Consequently, he has this terrible habit of taking screenshots of the women he likes, with a view to messaging them later.

I do feel bad for him. He tries so hard, but he doesn’t really take good care of himself. My friend is overweight, dresses poorly and really has no game. What to him feels like flirty freaks most women out.

And whilst he doesn’t seem to realise he’s living the definition of insanity, whenever we meet for a drink, he’s always eager to show me the screenshots of the women he’s attempting to talk to.

Couldn’t Stop Laughing

12. Meme-orable Profiles Harnessing the Power of Internet Laughter

However, the other day it all backfired on him. Even I found myself laughing to tears. His wife was helping their 6 year old with his homework and using the iPad was part of it.

Somehow they found themselves looking through the pictures. And lo and behold, she stumbled upon dozens and dozens of screenshots of these women on dating sites.

My friend was so bad at technology and couldn’t quite get his head around how the Apple ecosystem worked. And so every photo he took, every screenshot he took, was being synced to his sons’ iPad and their home computer.

As he told me what happened over some mojitos, I pissed myself laughing. I still do.

Just the thought of his son stumbling upon all these women, some topless……I can’t even finish this sentence because I’m laughing so much, suffice to say, that’s a new definition of education.

Imagine getting in trouble with your wife for screenshots of hot women, without actually being able to have an affair with any of them! A combination of hilarious and ironic.

But it did get me thinking about how men communicate with women.

How To Get Busted

Discovering and Coping with an Affair

“it’s not the crime, it’s the cover-up”

They say it’s never the crime that gets people caught, it’s the cover up. But in the cheating game, it’s the cover-up that’s key. A large number of affairs are discovered by women, simply by going through their man’s phone. And there it is, tons of text messages and WhatsApps with full on detailed conversations that make for an interesting read.

How Cheaters Communicate

8. Emo-Genius Decoding the Secret Language of Profile Emojis

And knowing this from day 1, I’ve always been very careful to communicate with my affair partners with discretion. Below are a list of my 3 favourite apps to use, which are unlikely obvious choices. And remember, if you happen to use any of them, remember to switch off the notifications so they don’t show up on your phone’s Home Screen at inopportune times.

  1. Telegram – whilst I do love all things geeky, Telegram is like WhatsApp on steroids. Sometimes you can get added to groups you don’t want to but it does mask your actual phone number, you can use an obscure screen name, and there’s no chance in hell your wife is going to even know what it is. The beauty about telegram is that if has a feature that auto deletes messages after a few seconds, leaving no trace.
  2. KIK – I absolutely hate this app, but for sites like Ashley Madison (Discover Hidden Features: Ashley Madison Tricks Exposed) and Illicit Encounters, it seems to be the go to app. Similar to Telegram, you can mask your number and identity. However, it has the worst functionality and feels buggy. Almost like a broken version of WhatsApp.
  3. I have a very active Instagram account, and for some reason, I love using DM. I’m on IG quite a lot, and am usually most responsive when chatting on DM. However, the downside is, you have to remember to manually delete the messages as well as ensuring the notifications are off. That coupled with the fact that your affair partner may be able to see too much about your personal life is something to keep in mind. They do have a habit of then asking a lot of questions about your wife. Best to avoid if possible.

And if you are so inclined to not tell women that you are married, using both Telegram and KIK are probably your best bets.

Even though having an affair is exciting and it’s very easy to get caught up in the moment (believe me, I’ve been there), don’t let yourself get stupid. Be smart, discreet and leave no trace. 

Even Cheaters Feel Pain Over Breakups

I’ve never been good at breakups. Ever. Even when I broke up with my first girlfriend at 17, I was a wreck. Firstly I got dumped!! 

And at the time, so many things went through my mind. That overwhelming fear of rejection surrounded me and I was convinced I’d never meet anyone as good ever again.

I had this feeling in the pit of my stomach and I just couldn’t shake it! 

Do You Text After A Hookup

I did everything to win her back. I sent her cards and flowers, I was even pathetic enough to record myself onto a cassette tape (remember those) and send it to her. Looking back, I cringe at my attempts…

It took me a long time to get over her. And in that dumping, I felt deflated. I felt that my confidence had been knocked so badly, I had even lost what little game I had back then completely. I had lost my ability to speak to other women, and I just kept comparing them to her. 

It was all just so pathetic. I was pathetic. 

But here’s what so strange. I never changed. Every breakup I went through, I felt exactly as I did above, but I had learnt to completely cut out the grovelling part. Effectively I just suffered in silence. 

I was great at chasing women and making them feel special, but I was a terrible boyfriend. Once in the comfort of a relationship, I’d always be out with my friends, often speaking to and hooking up with other girls, but knowing I had the security blanket of a girlfriend. 

And that meant I was the guy who got dumped quite a lot vs the guy who ended it.

I had even perfected the line, when people would ask me who ended it, I’d always say

it was a mutual decision.

I never had the strength to be the one to end it and I always just waited for it to end. And often, despite knowing the relationship wasn’t for me, I still took the breakups really badly. 

The flings were easy to forget and the one night stands were even easier, but those darned relationships – I always struggled. Remember to check out our article on how to know when it’s time to breakup with someone

Now if you’ve read some of my other posts, there’s no doubt I’m a playboy, a player, a womaniser – I’m not even going to be crass enough to tell you the number of the women I’ve slept with – but don’t think for a second it doesn’t come with its own emotional baggage. In my very first post I said:

Beyond all the texts, and butterflies, and sex – there’s an emotional toll. And you have to learn to deal with that, or it’s going to be obvious the second you get home!
Your wife will sense it, your kids will sense it – shoot, I’ve even seen guys come home and just confess their sins because they couldn’t live with the guilt.
This game isn’t for everyone, and it’s certainly no game! The stakes are high, the risk is high! And yes, for me the reward at the end of it is worth it, but I’ve developed the stomach for this!

And I meant every word of it. 

However, I came to accept that that was how I was built and I would just get used to the pain, ride it out, have more one night stands and flings until the next great relationship came along. 

And the meaningless sex between waiting for the next relationship was meant to take the hurt away – but for me, it never did!! As popeye said:

I Yam Who I Yam

Little did I know the pain of breaking up amplified ten fold after I got married. 

About 6 months ago I got out of a relationship that had gotten too serious. Not only was I married but so was she.

She was funny, pretty, intelligent and had a great career. Everything about her was perfect. We both fell in love with each other. Both of us would carve out an hour a day just to chat over the phone and we’d be messaging each other non stop. I was verging on getting sloppy but I was so in love and so was she. And don’t even get me started on the sex. It was all so perfect. 

In Too Deep

How To Hook Up With A Coworker

We’d both made the cardinal mistake in an affair, we fell for each other hard and fast! It had gotten so bad, that she had stopped being able to have orgasms when she was having sex with her husband (which strangely made me feel very happy). 

Neither of us could imagine a life without each other and both of us had contemplated leaving our spouses for each other. But she knew the rules from day 1, I’d never leave my wife and more importantly my 3 kids for anyone. Not even for the love of my life.  

Finally, after realising that this was only going to cause hurt and pain, she was the one who mustered up the strength and ended it. The only outcomes were bad and she knew this. I so desperately didn’t want it to end, and when it did, all those loving conversations turned into huge shouting matches to the point where we cut contact with each other.

And what happened when it ended? Pain all over again. Gut wrenching pain. But this time it was harder because I had to go home and play happy husband and father, as if none of this had ever happened. 

Things were made even worse because she was hugely active on social media and so I kept watching all her videos thinking I couldn’t even speak to her. There wasn’t this out of sight out of mind policy. She was literally on my phone and I couldn’t stop looking. And every time I watched one of her videos, I would miss her more and then hate her for ending it. 

In those 6 months since the breakup, I had several flings, several one night stands and yet until recently, all I could think about was her. 

I’m Sorry

Confessions and The Aftermath of Discovery

Now I want to apologise because I have kept the tone of this website generally upbeat, even funny at times. But my posts have been nothing but honest and as I always said on day 1 – I don’t glamourise cheating. I know it’s wrong. I’m not sitting here encouraging men to cheat.

No sir!

My mission has been to protect men from their families being hurt from our selfish behaviour. What they don’t find out will never hurt them. 

So let me leave you with this.

Yes, cheating can be fun. It can put you on Cloud 9 and give you a confidence that you’ve never possessed before.

But when it ends, there’s truly a toll.

It almost alters your DNA and if you can’t manage your state properly, you’ll end up taking out your frustrations on your family – which will leave them confused and wondering where your bad mood is coming from! It may even get you busted or somehow make you think that confessing will make the pain go away. Which it won’t.

Whilst I don’t feel guilt, I do feel pain.

I’ve learnt to manage it. However; if breakups affect you just as badly as they do me, then don’t go down this road. Because it’s filled with highs (which don’t last long) and some lows (which scar you forever). 

I occasionally watch my ex’s videos online of her out with friends or worse still her husband, but now I’m thankfully indifferent. It doesn’t both me at all. But it took me 6 whole months to get here. 

Don’t say I didn’t warn you. 

50 Tested Ashley Madison Tips & Tricks | Get More Matches Today

Ashley Madison Tips & Tricks

Let me just tell you gents, that if you’re reading an article like this one, you’re probably looking to increase the number of matches you get, which will get you that one step closer to finding your next affair partner. Believe me, I get it. Ashley Madison is famous. I mean not just for getting hacked (you can read about the Ashley Madison Hack here), but for being the dating site that so braizantly provided a platform that facilitated having an affair.

As someone who is a serial cheater (so much so that the newspapers asked me to writer for them. My feature in the Sun and Metro here,) I’ve always been a little too obsessed with checking out sites that encourage affairs. At the top of that list is of course Ashley Madison. Years ago when I first started using it, it was head and shoulders about everyone else. Of course, now Adult Friend Finder is (by a long shot), but Ashley Madison used to really rock it. Now and then I still do use it.

In fact just last year I had an amazing (short-lived) affair with someone from the UK. She was going through a messy divorce and was looking for an outlet. Me, I was just looking for an outlet 😉 But with quite a lot of experience on AM, I thought writing an article about Ashley Madison Tips & Tricks seemed apt.

When I first Joined Ashley Madison

Ashley Madison

When I first joined, I thought it would be easy. Of course, what drew me to the site was how it pushed extramarital affairs, but beyond that, the thought of meeting link-minded women was simply hard to resist. But it was hard. It wasn’t as easy as I thought to get matches. I learnt as I went on. I didn’t get it straight it away. It took plenty of getting it wrong, learning the lingo and going out and failing before I started to discover my own set of tricks that worked for me.

It goes without saying, that in all dating websites, there’s an element of trial and error. And what of course may work for you, may not work or feel natural for someone else, but effectively, I started to discover tips that would work for me more often than not. And once I started to get more matches, it led to more conversations, more phone calls and even the occasional coffee and FINALLY, an affair!

Fast forward a few months and I had met my first Affair Partner. It was great! She was great! And we both wanted some extra excitement in our lives and didn’t want to wreck our home life.

The beauty of Ashley Madison was that it goes without saying. It goes without saying that never rocking the boat at home was paramount. As obvious as this sounds, with other apps like Tinder, you’d often meet single people, and then have to explain to them that you’re married and you’ll never leave your wife, etc, etc.. And even if you got past them not thinking you’re a complete sleaze for wanting to cheat on your wife, there was always a small part of me that would wonder if they’d show up to your house and ruin your life. Sound extreme? Trust me, it’s been known to happen. If Tinder happens to be your jam (risky as it is), there is a secret method to having affairs on there. 

Want To Cheat, Need To Cheat

So, if you’re one of those daring Casanovas seeking more matches on this notorious website, you’ve come to the right place! Our article, “50 Ashley Madison Tips and Tricks,” will guide you through the treacherous yet tantalizing world of digital infidelity with humor, wit, and practical advice.

In this article, we’ll cover everything from crafting an irresistible profile that’ll have women swooning over your virtual persona to ensuring that your clandestine escapades remain on the down-low. After all, discretion is the name of the game on Ashley Madison (especially when you are cheating on your wife), and I’m here to provide you with top-notch tips to help you maintain your privacy while exploring new romantic opportunities.

As you delve into the depths of the platform, you’ll become well-versed in navigating its features, utilizing filters effectively, and making the most of the unique ‘Traveling Man’ feature. This feature allows you to connect with potential matches in other cities, making your business trips a tad more interesting. And if you’re worried about managing your digital tokens of affection, fear not! We’ll also give you the lowdown on understanding Ashley Madison’s credit system, and maybe how to get message without even having to pay.

Ashley Madison Alternatives – Horses For Courses

If you think that it’s you who needs tips and tricks, please at least consider it could be the site. It’s been known to be filled with bots and inactive accounts. At one point, the Impact Team released a study, saying that 90-95% of all women’s profiles were either bots or inactive. Don’t take it personally, just move on to the next site.

Before I go ahead and share my 50 tips, I will say that writing this article, the landscape has changed a lot. People like me have gotten bored with their site, their UX and overall the number of choices on there. For me it seems to have lost its excitement and a large swath of its customer base. Times have moved on and there’s a plethora of new alternatives to Ashley Madison, with my most recommended being Adult Friend Finder. For me, this has been my go to site, but I have friends you have had huge success using many more.

So, buckle up gentleman and prepare to embark on a journey filled with excitement, intrigue, and maybe just a touch of danger. As you explore the world of Ashley Madison, always remember our golden rule: “Life is short, so make the most of these 50 tips and tricks!

50 Ashley Madison Tips & Tricks From A Seasoned User

50 Ashley Madison Tips & Tricks From A Seasoned User

1) Choose an appealing and unique username

Your username is like the opening credits to the movie of your dating life on Ashley Madison. It sets the stage and creates intrigue, making it crucial to choose a memorable and distinctive one. Avoid clichés and overly suggestive names, which can make you come across as desperate or unoriginal. Instead, craft a username that reflects your personality, interests, or even your favorite TV shows and movies.

A witty and clever username can make potential matches chuckle and pique their curiosity. For example, if you’re a fan of “Game of Thrones” and enjoy hiking, you could opt for something like “MountainKingInTheNorth.” Or, if you’re a dog lover with a penchant for 90s sitcoms, consider “BarksAndRecreation.” These types of usernames not only showcase your interests but also exhibit a sense of humor.

Injecting a bit of wordplay into your username can be an excellent strategy. For instance, if you’re into photography, “LensAndChill” could be a fun spin on the popular phrase “Netflix and chill.” Alternatively, if you’re a fan of both “Star Wars” and cooking, you might try “DarthCulinary.”

When crafting your username, remember to keep it light-hearted and engaging. By making it a conversation starter, you’ll increase the likelihood of potential matches reaching out to you. Just think how much more memorable “JurassicParkourEnthusiast” would be compared to the all-too-common “JohnDoe123.”

2) Select a high-quality, captivating profile picture

Your profile picture is like the movie poster for the blockbuster film of your dating life on Ashley Madison. It should be eye-catching, enthralling, and leave potential matches wanting more. A high-quality, well-lit photo that showcases your best features is essential for making a lasting digital first impression.

Avoid the “Where’s Waldo?” effect by steering clear of group photos or images where your face is obscured. You don’t want potential matches squinting at your picture, trying to decipher which person you are, like they’re stuck in a scene from “Sherlock Holmes.” Make sure you’re the main attraction, front and center, in your profile picture.

Take inspiration from the famous “Mona Lisa” smile – it’s enigmatic, engaging, and keeps people guessing. A genuine smile can make you appear approachable and friendly, and as a bonus, it showcases your pearly whites. You don’t need to go full “Friends” Ross Geller with an overly bright smile, but a warm, inviting grin can go a long way in attracting connections.

When choosing your profile picture, think about what story you want to tell. Are you the adventurous Indiana Jones type, with photos from your latest escapades? Or do you prefer the suave James Bond vibe, posing in a sophisticated outfit? Whatever your style, let your personality shine through and captivate potential matches.

kramer portrait

Don’t be afraid to get creative and think outside the box. Take a cue from classic sitcom “Seinfeld” and consider a photo with a quirky background, like Kramer’s infamous portrait – just remember to make sure your face is still the focal point.

3) Write an intriguing and witty bio

Write an intriguing and witty bio

Your bio is like the opening monologue of your favorite late-night talk show – it sets the tone, showcases your personality, and gets potential matches interested in what you have to say. This is your opportunity to grab their attention, infuse your bio with humor, and leave them wanting more.

When crafting your bio, think of it as a mini-stand-up comedy routine. Keep it concise and engaging, peppered with amusing anecdotes or clever quips. Perhaps you’re a fan of “The Office” and want to mention how you’re seeking the Pam to your Jim on Ashley Madison. Or maybe you’re a die-hard “Star Wars” enthusiast looking for someone to explore galaxies far, far away with.

Mention your hobbies and interests in a creative way that showcases your unique personality. For instance, if you’re a foodie, you could say, “In search of a partner to help me on my quest to try every pizza joint in the city – must love pineapple as a topping!” Or if you’re a fitness enthusiast, you could write, “Looking for someone who can keep up with me on hikes and won’t mind me quoting ‘Rocky’ every time we conquer a new trail.”

Avoid negativity or excessive demands in your bio, as these can come across as off-putting and reminiscent of a villain in a Disney movie. Instead, focus on what you can offer and the kind of connection you’re seeking. This positive approach will make you seem approachable and more likely to attract like-minded matches.

Incorporating pop culture references can be a great conversation starter and showcase your shared interests. For example, you could say, “Seeking the Ron to my Hermione for a magical adventure,” or “Looking for a partner in crime to binge-watch ‘Breaking Bad’ with and debate the merits of Walter White’s decisions.”

4) Be honest about your intentions and relationship status

Honesty may be the best policy, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be fun and witty as well. When it comes to your intentions on Ashley Madison, think of yourself as the protagonist in a romantic comedy – you’re on a quest for love (or lust), and you want your potential matches to know exactly what you’re looking for.

Being transparent about your desires is like laying out the plot of your own personal rom-com. Clearly state whether you’re seeking a casual fling worthy of a “Friends with Benefits” storyline, an ongoing affair reminiscent of “The Affair,” or something else entirely – perhaps a “When Harry Met Sally” connection that defies expectations.

By injecting humor into your intentions, you’ll not only make your bio more engaging but also ensure that you attract compatible matches. For example, you could write, “Searching for my very own ‘Fifty Shades’ experience, but with more laughter and less brooding,” or “Ready to embark on a ‘Bridget Jones’-style adventure, minus the diary entries and blue soup mishaps.”

Don’t shy away from your relationship status either – embrace it with wit and honesty. If you’re married and looking for some excitement, you might say, “I’ve got my very own ‘Mr. & Mrs. Smith’ situation going on, and I’m looking for someone to spice things up.” Or if you’re single and seeking a unique connection, consider writing, “Navigating the dating world like a ‘Sex and the City’ character, but in search of my own unique story.”

5) Regularly update your profile with fresh information and photos

Think of your Ashley Madison profile as a long-running TV series – to keep your audience engaged, you’ll need to provide fresh content and new twists regularly. By updating your profile with new information and photos, you’ll keep potential matches intrigued and showcase your evolving interests and experiences.

Spice up your profile like a new season of your favorite show – add a plot twist with a recently discovered hobby or an exciting trip you’ve taken. For instance, if you’ve recently taken up salsa dancing, you could write, “Just started channeling my inner ‘Dirty Dancing’ moves on the salsa dance floor. Care to join me for a dance?” Or perhaps you’ve recently explored the culinary world and could mention, “Currently on a mission to master every dish from ‘Chef’s Table’ – any brave taste testers out there?”

Swapping out old photos for new ones is like releasing a fresh teaser trailer. It keeps your audience on their toes and showcases different aspects of your life. If you’ve recently attended a themed party, share a picture of your creative costume – it could be anything from a “Game of Thrones” ensemble to dressing up as your favorite “Avengers” character. Or if you’ve taken up a new sport, share an action shot that highlights your newfound passion.

6) Use a separate, dedicated email address for your account

Use a separate, dedicated email address for your account

Creating a dedicated email address for your Ashley Madison account is like assuming a secret identity in a superhero movie – it helps you maintain your privacy and keeps your online dating life separate from your everyday existence. This way, you can ensure better discretion and minimize the risk of an accidental “Spider-Man revealing his identity to the world” moment.

Consider this new email address your very own Batcave – a private, secluded space where you can manage your dating escapades without any unwanted intrusions. Much like Clark Kent’s glasses, this dedicated email address will act as a clever disguise, allowing you to keep your personal and professional correspondence separate from your dating adventures.

When creating your dedicated email address, have some fun with it – channel your inner “Men in Black” agent and create a name that’s both amusing and untraceable. For instance, if you’re a history buff, consider something like “AlexanderTheDiscreet” or “IncognitoNapoleon.”

7) Enable two-factor authentication for added security

In the world of online dating, protecting your privacy is as crucial as Agent 007 safeguarding classified information. By enabling two-factor authentication (2FA) for your Ashley Madison account, you’ll be adding an extra layer of security that even Q would approve of.

Think of 2FA as the top-secret password-protected briefcase in a spy movie – not only does it provide an extra level of protection, but it also makes you feel like you’re part of an elite team of undercover operatives. When you enable 2FA, you’ll be required to enter a verification code sent to your phone or email each time you log in, ensuring that only you can access your account.

Enabling 2FA is like equipping yourself with Batman’s utility belt – it’s a valuable tool that can help keep your online dating life safe from nefarious characters lurking in the shadows. Much like Tony Stark’s Iron Man suit, 2FA is a powerful defense mechanism that helps protect your privacy and maintain the integrity of your Ashley Madison account.

8) Be cautious when sharing location information

Be cautious when sharing location information

Navigating the world of online dating can sometimes feel like stepping into a thrilling spy thriller – filled with intrigue, adventure, and the need for discretion. When it comes to sharing location information on Ashley Madison, adopting the cautious mindset of a secret agent like Jason Bourne can be a wise approach.

Think of your location data as the top-secret headquarters in a blockbuster spy film – revealing too much too soon could put your mission at risk. Much like Ethan Hunt from “Mission: Impossible,” it’s essential to maintain your anonymity and be cautious when sharing your whereabouts with potential matches.

When discussing your favorite local spots or planning a meet-up, be as vague as the ending of “Inception.” Instead of giving away specific details, use broader terms to describe your location, like saying you live “near a popular park” or “just a few blocks from that famous landmark.” This way, you’ll maintain an air of mystery while still providing a general sense of your whereabouts.

9) Avoid oversharing personal details in your profile or early conversations

Navigating the world of online dating is like walking the fine line between Ross Geller’s “We were on a break!” and Chandler Bing’s “Could I BE any more vague?” Much like these iconic “Friends” characters, you’ll want to strike a balance between sharing enough information to be interesting and maintaining your privacy by not oversharing personal details.

Picture your profile and early conversations like a trailer for an upcoming movie – you want to give potential matches a taste of what’s to come without revealing all the juicy plot twists. Be mindful of the information you share, and keep in mind that even small details can inadvertently reveal your identity, much like a “How I Met Your Mother” clue that eventually leads to the mother’s unveiling.

Instead of divulging specifics about your occupation, try a more general approach – say you work “in the tech industry” or “in the world of finance.” This way, you’ll keep your potential matches intrigued without giving away your LinkedIn profile in a single sentence.

10) Consider using a VPN for additional privacy

Consider using a VPN for additional privacy

Venturing into the realm of online dating can feel like embarking on a quest for the “One Ring” in “The Lord of the Rings” – a journey filled with adventure, unexpected twists, and the need for utmost discretion. When it comes to protecting your privacy on Ashley Madison, utilizing a VPN (Virtual Private Network) is like summoning the power of the “cloak of invisibility” from “Harry Potter.”

Much like the intrepid hobbits hiding from the ever-watchful Eye of Sauron, a VPN helps you maintain your anonymity online by masking your IP address and encrypting your internet connection. With a VPN, you’ll be as stealthy as a ninja in a “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” episode, ensuring that your online dating activities remain private and secure.

11) Familiarize yourself with Ashley Madison’s features and functions

Mastering the ins and outs of Ashley Madison is like learning the rules of Jumanji – it’s essential to unlocking the full potential of the game and ensuring you stay ahead of any surprises that come your way. By familiarizing yourself with the platform’s features and functions, you’ll be like Tony Stark in his Iron Man suit – a dating powerhouse equipped with the latest technology and capabilities.

Much like assembling a team of “Avengers,” Ashley Madison offers a plethora of features designed to help you connect with your ideal match. From private messaging to chat rooms and virtual gifts, you’ll find plenty of tools at your disposal, all aimed at helping you build connections and boost your dating success.

12) Use search filters effectively to find compatible matches

Venturing into the world of online dating can sometimes feel like sifting through countless profiles in search of the perfect match – much like Indiana Jones hunting for lost artifacts in “Raiders of the Lost Ark.” To streamline your quest for dating success on Ashley Madison, using search filters effectively is the key – it’s like having your very own “Sorting Hat” from the “Harry Potter” series to guide you to compatible connections.

Think of search filters as your dating GPS – they help you navigate the vast landscape of potential matches and zero in on those who share your interests and desires. Just like Sherlock Holmes using his powers of deduction, you can apply filters to find profiles that align with your preferences, from age and location to specific interests and relationship goals.

13) Take advantage of the ‘Traveling Man/Woman’ feature when visiting other cities

Navigating the world of online dating while traveling can feel like stepping into a thrilling “James Bond” mission – a globe-trotting adventure filled with excitement, romance, and the allure of new connections. To make the most of your dating experiences on Ashley Madison when visiting other cities, embrace the ‘Traveling Man/Woman’ feature – it’s like having your very own “Doctor Who” TARDIS to transport you to exciting new destinations and encounters.

Picture the ‘Traveling Man/Woman’ feature as your personal dating teleporter, much like the one used by the X-Men’s Nightcrawler, allowing you to connect with potential matches in other cities before you even arrive. By using this feature, you’ll be able to pre-plan your dating escapades, ensuring you have a roster of exciting connections waiting for you at your destination – just like Bond meeting his local contacts in exotic locales.

14) Understand and manage the platform’s credit system

Navigating the credit system on Ashley Madison can feel like playing a strategic game of “Monopoly” – it’s all about managing your resources wisely to maximize your chances of success. By understanding and effectively managing the platform’s credit system, you’ll be like a “Wolf of Wall Street” trader, skillfully leveraging your assets for the best possible return on your investment.

Think of Ashley Madison’s credit system as your personal dating currency, much like the coins used in “Mario Kart” to unlock new features and opportunities. By purchasing and utilizing credits, you can access premium features like initiating conversations, sending gifts, and boosting your profile visibility, all aimed at enhancing your dating experience.

So, don your “Ocean’s Eleven” poker face and embrace the world of credit management on Ashley Madison. By understanding and effectively managing the platform’s credit system, you’ll be well on your way to becoming a dating powerhouse, maximizing your opportunities for connection and romance while keeping your investments in check.

15) Send engaging and personalized first messages

Crafting the perfect first message on Ashley Madison can feel like penning a witty one-liner for a sitcom – it’s all about striking the right balance between humor, intrigue, and personalization. By sending engaging and personalized first messages, you’ll be like a master wordsmith on a hit TV show, capturing the attention and interest of your audience with your clever wit and charm.

Picture your first message as an icebreaker at a “Friends” Central Perk-style coffeehouse, setting the stage for a captivating conversation with your potential match. Instead of relying on generic pickup lines or copy-pasting a generic message, take the time to read their profile and tailor your opening line to their interests or something unique about them. It’s like the “How I Met Your Mother” playbook – the more thought and effort you put into your message, the better your chances of sparking a connection.

16) Ask open-ended questions to keep the conversation flowing

Ask open-ended questions to keep the conversation flowing

Keeping a conversation flowing on Ashley Madison can feel like being a contestant on “Jeopardy!” – it’s all about asking the right questions and engaging your potential match in a lively exchange of ideas. By asking open-ended questions, you’ll be like a skilled interviewer on a late-night talk show, effortlessly guiding the conversation and creating a genuine connection with your guest.

Picture your conversation as a dance routine from “La La Land” – the key to success lies in the intricate interplay between you and your partner. Instead of firing off a barrage of yes-or-no questions that can quickly bring the conversation to a standstill, opt for open-ended inquiries that encourage your match to share more about themselves, their interests, and their experiences, much like a captivating story arc in a critically acclaimed drama series.

17) Be genuine, respectful, and attentive in your interactions

Navigating the world of online dating on Ashley Madison can feel like stepping onto the set of a reality TV show – it’s all about building connections, creating chemistry, and showcasing your best qualities. By being genuine, respectful, and attentive in your interactions, you’ll be like the fan-favorite contestant that captures the hearts of both your potential matches and the audience at home.

Picture your online interactions as a heart-to-heart conversation in a romantic comedy – the key to winning over your potential match is authenticity and sincerity. Instead of trying to adopt a persona or impress with exaggerated claims, embrace your true self and let your unique qualities shine through, much like the memorable characters in a coming-of-age drama.

18) Know when to take the conversation off the platform

Once you’ve established trust and rapport with a potential match, consider moving the conversation to a more personal platform, such as email or phone. This can help create a more intimate connection and show that you’re serious about taking things to the next level.

19) Establish boundaries and expectations with potential matches

Clear communication is key to a successful dating experience. Discuss your boundaries, preferences, and expectations with potential matches to ensure that you’re on the same page and can navigate your connection with mutual understanding and respect.

20) Look out for red flags and potential scams

Setting the stage for a successful online dating experience on Ashley Madison can feel like carefully crafting the plot of a riveting mystery novel – it’s all about clarity, communication, and ensuring that everyone is on the same page. By establishing boundaries and expectations with potential matches, you’ll be like the skilled detective in a thrilling whodunit, expertly piecing together the puzzle of your romantic connections.

Think of your dating journey as a captivating “choose your own adventure” story, where you and your potential match navigate the twists and turns of your unique relationship. Instead of leaving things to chance or misinterpretation, take the time to discuss your boundaries and expectations openly and honestly, much like the candid confessions in a gripping memoir.

21) Trust your instincts and prioritize your safety

Navigating the online dating landscape on Ashley Madison can feel like embarking on an epic journey through a fantasy novel – it’s full of excitement, adventure, and the occasional unexpected challenge. By trusting your instincts and prioritizing your safety, you’ll be like the wise and resourceful hero in a thrilling saga, expertly maneuvering through the twists and turns of your romantic quest.

Consider your dating experiences as an intricate labyrinth, much like the ones featured in a gripping sci-fi thriller. As you explore the various connections and conversations, rely on your intuition to guide you through the maze of potential matches. If something feels off or raises a red flag, trust your gut and proceed with caution, just as a skilled secret agent would in a high-stakes espionage mission.

22) Arrange initial meetings in public places

Arrange initial meetings in public places

Embarking on the journey of meeting potential matches from Ashley Madison can feel like stepping into the world of a captivating romantic comedy – it’s filled with anticipation, excitement, and the hope of discovering a genuine connection. By arranging initial meetings in public places, you’ll be like the savvy and safety-conscious protagonist in a feel-good film, ensuring that your romantic encounters are both enjoyable and secure.

Picture your first in-person meeting as a scene from a charming, heartwarming movie. As you and your potential match prepare to meet, choose a location that’s both comfortable and public, much like the bustling café or scenic park featured in a blockbuster romance. This ensures that your meeting takes place in a safe, neutral environment, setting the stage for a memorable and secure rendezvous.

23) Practice safe digital communication and maintain discretion throughout your interactions

Delving into the world of online dating on Ashley Madison can feel like navigating a thrilling spy thriller – it’s full of intrigue, clandestine encounters, and the need for discretion. By practicing safe digital communication and maintaining discretion throughout your interactions, you’ll be like the skilled and cautious secret agent in a gripping espionage saga, ensuring that your romantic adventures remain under wraps and secure.

Consider your dating journey as a high-stakes game of cat and mouse, with each interaction requiring a delicate balance of openness and confidentiality. As you communicate with potential matches, embrace your inner 007 and employ secure messaging practices, just as a seasoned spy would when transmitting classified information in a suspenseful spy caper.

24) Be open to exploring different types of connections and experiences

Venturing into the world of online dating on Ashley Madison can feel like embarking on a thrilling journey through a captivating anthology – each connection and experience offers a unique story, brimming with potential for excitement, growth, and discovery. By being open to exploring different types of connections and experiences, you’ll be like the adventurous protagonist in a fascinating collection of tales, ready to embrace the unexpected and revel in the unknown.

Consider your dating journey as a vibrant mosaic, much like the tapestry of characters and narratives featured in a spellbinding TV series. As you engage with potential matches and explore various relationships, approach each encounter with curiosity and openness, just as a daring explorer would when venturing into uncharted territories in an enthralling adventure flick.

25) Keep a sense of humor and stay light-hearted in your conversations

Navigating the world of online dating on Ashley Madison can feel like tuning into an engaging sitcom – it’s filled with witty banter, amusing anecdotes, and the occasional dose of awkwardness. By keeping a sense of humor and staying light-hearted in your conversations, you’ll be like the charismatic lead in a beloved comedy series, setting the stage for fun and laughter-filled connections.

Think of your dating journey as a laugh-out-loud comedy sketch, with each interaction offering the chance for playful repartee and entertaining exchanges. As you chat with potential matches, embrace your inner comedic genius and let your sense of humor shine, just as a hilarious character would in a side-splitting stand-up routine.

26) Show genuine interest in getting to know your matches

Venturing into the world of online dating on Ashley Madison can feel like stepping into the pages of a compelling novel – each connection offers the opportunity to learn about someone’s unique story, filled with intricate layers, captivating anecdotes, and the potential for shared adventures. By showing genuine interest in getting to know your matches, you’ll be like the attentive and empathetic protagonist in a heartwarming tale, fostering meaningful connections built on understanding and curiosity.

Visualize your dating journey as an intriguing mystery, with each interaction revealing new clues and insights into your potential match’s personality and history. As you engage in conversation, embrace your inner detective and ask thoughtful questions, just as a skilled investigator would when piecing together the puzzle of a captivating whodunit.

27) Be patient and understand that finding the right match may take time

Embarking on the journey of online dating on Ashley Madison can feel like joining the cast of a captivating reality show – it’s full of intriguing personalities, unexpected twists, and the quest for a perfect match. By being patient and understanding that finding the right connection may take time, you’ll be like the level-headed contestant in a thrilling dating competition, staying the course and keeping your eye on the ultimate prize: a meaningful and fulfilling connection.

Visualize your dating journey as an enthralling treasure hunt, with each interaction offering clues and hints towards discovering that elusive and priceless gem – a compatible and lasting match. As you engage with potential partners, embrace your inner Indiana Jones and exhibit patience and perseverance, just as a determined adventurer would when seeking the hidden riches of a legendary lost city.

28) Don’t be discouraged by rejection or setbacks; stay persistent

Diving into the world of online dating on Ashley Madison can feel like participating in an exciting game show – it’s full of thrilling challenges, unexpected obstacles, and the pursuit of a grand prize: a meaningful connection with someone special. By not being discouraged by rejection or setbacks and staying persistent, you’ll be like the tenacious competitor in a high-stakes contest, overcoming hurdles and keeping your eyes on the end goal.

Envision your dating journey as an exhilarating obstacle course, with each interaction offering opportunities to learn, grow, and adapt. As you connect with potential matches, embrace your inner Rocky Balboa and exhibit resilience and determination, just as a committed athlete would when training for a championship bout.

29) Celebrate your successes and learn from any challenges

Embarking on the journey of online dating on Ashley Madison can feel like taking part in a captivating personal growth story – it’s full of opportunities for self-discovery, celebrating triumphs, and learning valuable lessons from setbacks. By acknowledging your successes and using challenges as learning experiences, you’ll be like the self-reflective protagonist in an empowering tale of transformation, evolving and growing with each new encounter.

Picture your dating journey as a riveting adventure, with each interaction providing chances for personal development and growth. As you engage with potential matches, embrace your inner Luke Skywalker and approach every experience with an open heart and mind, just as a courageous hero would when facing the unknown in a spellbinding epic.

30) Keep a balance between your online dating life and other aspects of your life

Venturing into the realm of online dating on Ashley Madison can feel like stepping onto the set of a thrilling TV series – it’s full of captivating characters, engaging plotlines, and the pursuit of romantic connections. By maintaining a balance between your online dating life and other aspects of your life, you’ll be like the well-rounded protagonist in a compelling drama, juggling multiple facets of life while keeping your priorities in check.

Consider your dating journey as a gripping narrative, with each interaction adding depth and color to your personal storyline. As you connect with potential matches, embrace your inner Don Draper and approach your dating life with a sense of equilibrium, just as a multifaceted character would when navigating the complexities of work, relationships, and personal growth in a riveting period drama.

31) Respect the privacy and boundaries of others on the platform

Just as you value your privacy, be respectful of the privacy and boundaries of your matches. Be mindful of the information you request and the expectations you place on others.

32) Be open to giving and receiving feedback to improve your dating experience

Exploring the world of online dating on Ashley Madison can feel like participating in a transformative reality show – it’s full of opportunities for self-improvement, meaningful connections, and candid feedback. By being open to giving and receiving feedback, you’ll be like the growth-minded contestant in a captivating social experiment, continuously learning and adapting to enhance your dating experience.

Think of your dating journey as a stimulating personal development workshop, with each interaction providing valuable insights and lessons. As you engage with potential matches, embrace your inner Ted Lasso and approach feedback with an open mind and heart, just as a supportive coach would when fostering growth and development in a heartwarming sports comedy.

34) Maintain a positive attitude and focus on the potential for exciting new connections

Navigating the world of online dating on Ashley Madison can feel like stepping into a heartwarming romantic comedy – it’s full of surprising twists, engaging characters, and the promise of exciting new connections. By maintaining a positive attitude and focusing on the potential for meeting interesting people, you’ll be like the optimistic protagonist in an enchanting love story, ready to embrace life’s adventures and unexpected romances.

Picture your dating journey as a delightful narrative, with each interaction offering the chance to discover new connections and exciting possibilities. As you engage with potential matches, channel your inner Amélie Poulain and approach your dating life with a sense of wonder and optimism, just as a whimsical character would when exploring the magic and charm of a captivating French film.

35) Stay informed about changes and updates on Ashley Madison

Delving into the world of online dating on Ashley Madison can feel like joining a suspenseful mystery series – it’s full of unexpected developments, evolving storylines, and the potential for thrilling connections. By staying informed about changes and updates on the platform, you’ll be like the resourceful detective in an enthralling whodunit, always ready to adapt and uncover new opportunities for romance.

Envision your dating journey as an intriguing puzzle, with each update and change presenting new pieces to explore and fit together. As you interact with potential matches, channel your inner Sherlock Holmes and approach the ever-evolving landscape of Ashley Madison with curiosity and determination, just as a brilliant investigator would when solving a captivating case in a gripping crime drama.

36) Be adaptable and willing to adjust your approach if needed

Venturing into the world of online dating on Ashley Madison can feel like being part of an exhilarating reality show – it’s full of unpredictable challenges, shifting dynamics, and opportunities for growth. By being adaptable and willing to adjust your approach, you’ll be like the resourceful contestant in a high-stakes competition, always prepared to pivot and seize new chances for romantic connections.

Picture your dating journey as a thrilling game, with each interaction offering valuable insights and opportunities to refine your strategy. As you engage with potential matches, channel your inner “Survivor” contestant and approach the ever-changing environment of Ashley Madison with determination and flexibility, just as a skilled competitor would when outwitting opponents in a riveting tropical adventure.

37) Keep an open mind and be willing to explore new aspects of your desires

Embarking on your Ashley Madison journey can feel like stepping into a captivating fantasy series – it’s full of fascinating characters, uncharted territories, and opportunities for self-discovery. By keeping an open mind and being willing to explore new aspects of your desires, you’ll be like the curious adventurer in an enchanting saga, ready to embrace the unknown and uncover hidden treasures.

38) Practice effective time management to make the most of your Ashley Madison experience

Navigating the world of Ashley Madison can feel like starring in a thrilling time-travel adventure – it’s full of exciting encounters, unexpected twists, and opportunities to make the most of every moment. By practicing effective time management, you’ll be like the ingenious time-traveler in a gripping saga, adept at seizing opportunities and making the most of your exhilarating journey.

Envision your dating experience as an exhilarating race against the clock, with each interaction offering valuable lessons and chances to refine your approach. As you engage with potential matches, channel your inner protagonist from a pulse-pounding thriller, and tackle the challenges of Ashley Madison with strategic planning and a keen eye on the clock, just as a skilled operative would when diffusing a high-stakes situation.

39) Know your own limits and communicate them clearly to your matches

Venturing into the world of Ashley Madison can feel like embarking on an epic journey of self-discovery – it’s full of intriguing encounters, valuable lessons, and opportunities to learn more about yourself. By knowing your own limits and communicating them clearly to your matches, you’ll be like the self-aware protagonist in a captivating narrative, adept at expressing your needs and forging meaningful connections.

Picture your dating adventure as a poignant coming-of-age tale, with each interaction offering the chance to grow and understand yourself more deeply. As you engage with potential matches, channel your inner hero from a heartfelt drama, and approach your journey with honesty and self-awareness, just as a wise protagonist would when navigating the complexities of life and love.

40) Be honest with yourself about your expectations and desires

Be honest with yourself about your expectations and desires

Embarking on your Ashley Madison adventure can feel like stepping into a mesmerizing character study – it’s full of fascinating encounters, illuminating moments, and opportunities to delve deeper into your own motivations and desires. By being honest with yourself about your expectations and desires, you’ll be like the insightful protagonist in an engaging narrative, adept at understanding your own needs and pursuing fulfilling connections.

Envision your dating journey as a rich exploration of the human experience, with each interaction offering the chance to learn more about your authentic self. As you connect with potential matches, channel your inner lead from a compelling drama, and approach your journey with sincerity and introspection, just as a perceptive character would when grappling with the intricacies of their own heart.

41) Utilize the platform’s resources and support options if needed

Diving into the world of Ashley Madison can feel like embarking on a thrilling adventure – it’s full of captivating encounters, unexpected twists, and opportunities to make the most of the platform’s resources. By utilizing Ashley Madison’s resources and support options when needed, you’ll be like the resourceful protagonist in an exhilarating tale, adept at overcoming obstacles and forging meaningful connections.

Picture your dating journey as a riveting quest, with each interaction offering the chance to learn more about the platform and its various features. As you engage with potential matches, channel your inner hero from an action-packed blockbuster, and approach your journey with a willingness to seek help and guidance, just as a fearless adventurer would when facing seemingly insurmountable challenges.

42) Keep track of your interactions and follow up with potential matches

Navigating the realm of Ashley Madison can feel like unfolding a complex and intriguing plot – it’s full of captivating encounters, meaningful connections, and opportunities to keep track of your interactions. By staying organized and following up with potential matches, you’ll be like the attentive protagonist in a riveting drama, adept at maintaining meaningful relationships and fostering deeper connections.

43) Remain discrete and considerate of others’ privacy, both online and offline

Venturing into the world of Ashley Madison can feel like entering a sophisticated and enigmatic narrative – it’s full of intriguing encounters, delicate situations, and opportunities to practice discretion. By remaining discrete and considerate of others’ privacy, you’ll be like the diplomatic protagonist in an engrossing story, adept at handling sensitive matters and fostering trust with those around you.

44) Embrace the learning process and strive for self-improvement

Embarking on the journey with Ashley Madison can feel like stepping into an inspiring and transformative narrative – it’s full of enriching experiences, personal growth, and opportunities to embrace the learning process. By striving for self-improvement and continually evolving, you’ll be like the dynamic protagonist in an uplifting tale, adept at overcoming challenges and discovering your true potential.

Picture your dating journey as a coming-of-age story, with each interaction offering the chance to learn more about yourself and the world of online dating. As you engage with others on the platform, channel your inner adventurer from a beloved film and approach your journey with a commitment to growth, just as a determined character would when facing life-changing experiences.

45) Create a sense of mystery and intrigue in your interactions

Diving into the world of Ashley Madison can feel like immersing yourself in a spellbinding and enigmatic narrative – it’s full of tantalizing encounters, captivating connections, and opportunities to create a sense of mystery and intrigue. By weaving an air of mystique into your interactions, you’ll be like the charismatic protagonist in a riveting tale, adept at piquing curiosity and drawing others into your captivating world.

Envision your dating journey as a mesmerizing romance novel, with each interaction offering the chance to learn more about your potential matches while keeping them guessing. As you engage with others on the platform, channel your inner charmer from a popular series and approach your journey with a flair for the mysterious, just as an alluring character would when weaving a web of enchantment.

46) Set realistic expectations for your online dating journey

Embarking on the adventure with Ashley Madison can feel like stepping into a captivating and insightful narrative – it’s full of eye-opening experiences, valuable lessons, and opportunities to set realistic expectations. By managing your expectations and adopting a pragmatic outlook, you’ll be like the wise protagonist in an enlightening tale, adept at navigating the world of online dating with a clear and grounded perspective.

47) Practice active listening in your conversations

Delving into the world of Ashley Madison can feel like embarking on a compelling and emotionally rich narrative – it’s full of heartfelt exchanges, genuine connections, and opportunities to practice active listening. By honing your listening skills and genuinely engaging with your matches, you’ll be like the empathetic protagonist in a moving tale, adept at forging deep connections and understanding others on a profound level.

Picture your dating journey as a poignant drama, with each interaction offering the chance to learn more about your potential matches and their unique stories. As you engage with others on the platform, channel your inner confidant from an emotionally resonant film and approach your journey with a commitment to active listening, just as a compassionate character would when providing solace and support.

48) Be prepared for the ups and downs of online dating

Be prepared for the ups and downs of online dating

Venturing into the world of Ashley Madison can feel like embarking on a roller coaster ride – it’s full of exhilarating highs, challenging lows, and opportunities to embrace the ups and downs of online dating. By preparing yourself for the inevitable twists and turns, you’ll be like the resilient protagonist in a thrilling tale, adept at facing the unexpected and remaining adaptable in the face of change.

49) Stay open to feedback from your matches

Navigating the thrilling world of Ashley Madison can feel like a gripping TV series, full of plot twists, character development, and unexpected revelations. As you explore this exhilarating landscape, it’s essential to stay open to feedback from your matches. By doing so, you’ll be like the ever-evolving protagonist in a binge-worthy drama, ready to learn from experiences and grow as a person.

Envision your dating journey as an engrossing story arc, where each interaction offers a chance for self-reflection and growth. As you connect with others on the platform, channel your inner lead from a critically acclaimed show and embrace the opportunity to learn from your matches’ feedback, just as a multifaceted character would when facing life’s challenges and triumphs.

50) Enjoy the journey and have fun

Diving into the world of Ashley Madison can be like jumping into a fun-filled, feel-good sitcom, brimming with laughter, surprises, and memorable moments. As you embark on this lively adventure, remember to enjoy the journey and have fun. By adopting a lighthearted attitude, you’ll be like the lovable characters in your favorite comedy series, finding joy in the unexpected and embracing the lighter side of life.

Picture your dating experience as an entertaining episode, where each interaction presents an opportunity to laugh, learn, and make lasting memories. As you engage with others on the platform, channel your inner sitcom star and approach each encounter with a playful spirit, just as the quirky characters in a long-running comedy would when navigating life’s twists and turns.

Conclusion

Conclusion

 

Armed with these tips and tricks, you’ll be like Neo in “The Matrix,” dodging dating disasters and outsmarting the obstacles on your way to success. From crafting an irresistible online dating profile (think James Bond meets Ryan Gosling) to mastering the art of engaging communication, you’ll have the skills to woo your matches like a seasoned pro. Studies have shown that having a well-written profile can make a significant impact on your dating success, with 52% of users finding profiles with well-crafted bios more attractive.

But just like Peter Parker, with great power comes great responsibility. Remember to balance honesty and discretion as you navigate this digital dating landscape. Ensure your privacy and security are as impenetrable as Fort Knox by using separate emails, phone numbers, and enabling two-factor authentication. After all, nobody wants their online escapades to become a plot twist in the next episode of “Black Mirror.” A study conducted by the Pew Research Center found that 53% of users feel online dating has made people more cautious about their privacy and security.

In summary, these tips and tricks will have you feeling as confident as Tony Stark at a tech conference, charming your way through the exciting world of AM. So suit up, gentlemen, and get ready to make the most of your experience on this discreet dating platform. With a little luck and a lot of savvy, you’ll be well on your way to creating your own blockbuster love story. Let the credits roll!

FAQs

  1. How can I improve my profile to attract more matches?

To improve your profile, use high-quality photos that showcase your personality and interests. Write a concise and engaging bio, highlighting your unique qualities and what you’re looking for in a match. Update your profile regularly to keep it fresh and interesting.

  1. What should I include in my opening message to grab attention?

Craft a personalized and engaging opening message by referencing something from the recipient’s profile. Show genuine interest and ask open-ended questions to spark conversation. Avoid generic or overly forward messages that might come across as insincere or pushy.

  1. How can I maintain discretion while using Ashley Madison?

To maintain discretion, use a separate email and phone number for your Ashley Madison communications. Limit conversations to the platform until you feel comfortable sharing contact information, and exercise caution when connecting with matches on social media.

  1. How can I optimize my search to find the best potential matches?

Use the platform’s advanced search features to filter your matches based on specific criteria such as location, age, interests, and relationship status. Experiment with different search combinations to find the best potential matches for your preferences.

  1. How do I spot and avoid scams or fake profiles on the platform?

Be vigilant and trust your instincts when interacting with profiles or users. Look for signs of authenticity, such as verified profiles and well-written bios. If something feels off, disengage and report any suspicious activity to Ashley Madison’s customer support.

  1. How can I make the most of the features Ashley Madison offers?

Explore and utilize Ashley Madison’s features like Priority Man, Traveling Man, and customizable search filters to enhance your experience on the platform. These features can help you increase your visibility, connect with matches in new locations, and refine your search for the ideal partner.

  1. What can I do to ensure a successful in-person date with a match?

For a successful in-person date, choose a neutral and public location, communicate openly about your expectations, and remain respectful and considerate throughout the encounter. Always prioritize safety by informing a trusted friend of your plans and trusting your instincts during the date.

 

Die With The Lie: What Cover Story Do You Tell Your Mistress?

I recently re-watched the movie Focus. What an amazing movie. It’s about a team of con artists, running a series of small and big scams. There’s something about this movie that I can relate to so much and let’s be honest, hard to hate a movie with Margot Robbie.

In the movie – Will smith gives Margot Robbie advice. The most crucial advice in the whole movie:

You Never Drop The Con, You Never Break. Die With The Lie

 

And whilst that was in the movies, the most famous Mafia Boss, John Gotti would say to his crew:

If there was a church robbed and I had the steeple stickin’ out of my ass, I still wouldn’t tell them I did it.

This leads me on to my next topic.

What do you tell your new squeeze? How do you approach your next affair?

An Informal Affair: Casual Relationship Apps

Do you tell them that you’re married, have kids, living with someone, have a long-term girlfriend, or nothing at all?

Now remember, who am I to judge what you say, I’ve tried them all. I’ve said it all, I’ve done it all. This is me wearing the mother fucking t-shirt. 

There’s this great scene in Spy Game, where Rob Redford is teaching Brad Pitt how to be a spy and how to extract information from strangers.

Brad Pitt approaches this women to get information from her, and in the process, he gives her 4 lies about himself just to get one piece of information out of her.

The most amazing thing about the scene is when Rob looks at Brad and says

what if she were an asset, you told her 4 lies that now have to be true.

And that’s completely relevant here. When coming up with the cover story, there’s a lot of juggling to do, a lot of remembering to do, and all of the lies you may have told, now have to hold true. Let me share some of my experience: 

1) ‘I’m single’ 

Married with 3 kids, and I would go out there and be like I’m single. But in today’s world, social media, WhatsApp is such a big part of it – that the first thing a single lady is going to do is look you up.

And if they see family photos on your Facebook, they won’t be impressed, further still, they now know who your significant other is and how to get hold of them.

I hated the I’m single approach. I used a fake name, I needed a burner phone with a different WhatsApp ID, I created a fake Facebook and twitter page – and it simply was too much work. 

Hard to say you’re single when the wife is texting you the shopping list for the house and the kids!

I once dated an Australian TV Reporter. She was gorgeous and we met at a wine tasting. After the event, I walked her to the bus stop, where we found ourselves kissing until her bus eventually arrived. It wasn’t long after when I got an abusive text from her after she had discovered I was married – she was already planning on cooking for our first date! Crash and burn! 

2) ‘I’m married but I’m separated’

I decided to use this approach for a while. To my utter surprise, it ended up being an aphrodisiac, and somehow I had fallen into certain women’s rescue fantasy – where they felt the need to save me.

I’m not going to lie – I kind of liked this.

It worked really well. Except when things got too serious, and somehow, some of the women were hanging around until the ‘divorce‘ went through. Ultimately, I didn’t find this that fair on them and decided to cull this approach. Not to say this wasn’t an amazing approach – but it did have its disadvantages. 

3) ‘I’m married with kids’ 

So after nearly 2 decades of cheating, since being married and having kids (last 10 years) – I realised how much experience I had in cheating.

I had experience in reading women and attracting the right type of partner into my life. I decided how about being honest?

Maybe that was the way to go; dispense with all the lying, all the fake profiles, all the juggling acts, and just be real. And whilst I do date married women (MILFs) as well as single ones, I had an interesting response to this approach.

Married women loved it because they too didn’t want to ruin their home lives and, both them and I had an equal amount to lose if it ever came out – thereby guaranteeing the discretion that I crave! It also helps lower the risk of having the affair discovered.

This line of course didn’t work on loads of single women, with many of them labelling me as disgusting or a sleaze. The other half loved it – they got to have the fun of a relationship without any of the baggage. They were realists and pragmatists and it also fit a purpose for them too.

Whichever approach you take, remember to always keep your cover story intact. Die With The Lie (unless of course you copy me and go with Option 3). 

Cheating Is Like A Drug | Highly Addictive

cheating is like a drug

There’s something about cheating which is truly quite addictive. The build up to it, the cheating and the getting away with it – it’s thrilling! There really are no words to describe it. I remember the first time I cheated on my girlfriend, I was 18. I had somehow gotten into this crazy love triangle, of dating my ex at the same time. And I just couldn’t get enough!

The attention from both these girls filled me with that warm and fuzzy feeling and let’s not forget how amazing the sex was. In my teens I struggled to get one women, and here I was at 18 with two very attractive girls. And whether you want to call it greed, or stupidity or any other adjective, I wanted more. I wanted to see if I could just keep on collecting more and newer girls.

I was simply hooked!

And 22 years later, I’m still hooked. And still cheating and still want more!

Was I Alone? Was Time To Look At The Data

I turned to the infidelity stats. It’s estimated up to 57% of men cheat at least once in their lifetime. Why? Because casual sex with no strings attached is one of the greatest pleasures known to man. In fact, it’s thought that around a quarter of married men have enjoyed long-standing affairs on the side. If you’re thinking about playing away from the marital bed, there’s usually no such thing as a one and done. Once you’re in, you’re in it for the long haul.

Infidelity Stats - how Many Men Cheat

 

The Science Behind Sleeping Around

If you’ve become addicted to cheating, you’re not alone. What’s more, you’ll be glad to know that science has a name for that compulsion to keep chasing sex with casual partners. It’s called “flame addiction“. Looking to ease any feelings of guilt? The good news is that you’re not really in control of your actions. Once a man’s interest has been piqued by a new piece, hormones and neurochemicals take over.

Do you feel like there’s adrenaline rushing through your veins as you drive to that hotel for your next hookup? Well, it sort of is. There’s also a significant drop in serotonin levels, which loosens up your inhibitions. Most importantly, the brain gets flooded with dopamine. Otherwise known as the reward chemical, it’s dopamine that puts the cherry on top of every sexual encounter.

This rush, combined with the inevitable ecstasy that comes at the end of an hour-long session, is like nothing else. But like any chemical-induced euphoria, there’s the inescapable crash. Eventually, that feeling fades and you’re left pining for your next hit.

Sometimes, the same routine isn’t enough to scratch that itch. Casual sex and cheating are often a case of diminishing returns. To make sure you reach that blissful high more often than not, you need to keep on top of the more compulsive side of cheating. And if you’re any good at reading when married women like you, then you’re going to be on this ferris wheel a long time.

Dealing with the Compulsion

If you’re good enough to keep getting away with it, carrying on with multiple partners indefinitely is a no harm, no foul situation. That being said, you still need to keep your compulsions in check. Itching to empty your load in the middle of the day? If you have an alibi in place and there’s zero chance of you getting found out, go for it.

However, that impromptu rendezvous could be incredibly risky. If you don’t have time to preplan your line of defense, keep it in your pants for the time being.

It might seem like it’s taking the fun out of things, but establishing some ground rules for yourself is a good idea. Be realistic about when you’re realistically free to go off and chase a one-nighter.

Feel something stirring at noon on a Saturday? You’ve zero chance of styling that one out once you return home stinking of sweat and someone else’s perfume.

Got an hour to kill after an early finish at the office? Bingo.

Be opportunistic when it comes to planning your next tryst. If you’ve got your wheels and an app-filled phone at your disposal, the world is your oyster.

Of course when I was 18 there were no smartphones, no apps, just good old fashioned calls and texting. The type of texting where you had to press the number a few times to get to the right letter.

I recently asked myself what specifically about cheating I was addicted to. Was it the flirting with someone new, or was it the sex, or was it the the getting away with it.

And what I concluded was that it was a combination of all 3, but all 3 stages had within them their own highs…

If You Could Get Away With Cheating Would You?

Let’s for a moment assume that you had that pen that Will Smith so amazingly demonstrated in Men In Black – you know the pen that flashes out green light and makes you have amnesia.

Now, for the sake of this post, let’s say you have that pen, and it only works on your significant other to erase any memory of you cheating…..

You’ve now got in possession with you, something better than a Hall Pass. What will you do with your new found power?

Rebuilding Trust After Cheating: Steps and Strategies

Would you cheat? Would you ask out the girl at the office you’ve been starring at for years? Would you go out on a boy’s night and let loose? Would you grab your phone and download the latest dating app in an attempt to find that girl?

It’s insane to me to think that there’s all these people out there cheating, they effectively get away with it, but somehow let their guilt consume them – which effectively leads to them making a confession. See below, our advanced mathematical formula of what I’m trying to say:

GUILT = CONFESSSION

I know a guy just like this. John was a corporate executive. You know the type, wore nothing but polo shirts, made like $300k a year, had a nice car, a lovely family, membership down at the countryclub, friends with influence, etc, etc… From the outset, John’s life was perfect.

He graced us once a month for our Poker Game. We called it the Executive Game (sorry Uncle Junior) – and it was set in stone. Even if one of the players was busy or away for work, they’d always fly back for this game.

Despite the name, the stakes were small, but it was our chance to shoot the shit, to drink, to smoke up, to talk about men stuff! Which mostly involved moaning about politicians and the state of the planet! But nonethelesss, we thought it was men’s work!

Anyway, at out last game, John looked glum. It was clear something was wrong. He wasn’t himself. He wasn’t bragging about who he knew, or the latest Mercedes he wanted to buy – he was quiet. John being quiet meant something was wrong, hang on, I have another formula below to explain my hypothesis:

QUIET JOHN = WE HAD PROBLEMS

Rebuilding Trust in a Relationship After Cheating: Therapy and Communication

We kept teasing him, wondering if he didn’t get his promotion at work, or if he had just lost his latest round of golf. But before we could really up the harrasssment, he just blurted out:

‘I’m getting a divorce!’

That was it. Complete silence hit the room, punctuated by the cigar smoke rising from the ashtrays and the sound of poker chips being shuffled nervously. None of us knew what to say.

I finally found my tongue and sheepishly asked ‘what happened?’

He went on to explain that he and his assistant had been having a torrid affair for a few months and that he was deeply in love with her. She’d been travelling with him from city to city and at some point it happened.

It kept happening.

However, the assistant knew he was married and also realised that for her it was also a win. She’d get all the fun out of the relationship without any of the headaches and complications. He pointed out that there was a clear win for both (at least when it started).

But John, being as John is, started to fall for his assistant. He started to profess his love for her, fantasising about running away with her. Instead of being flattered and excited at that prospect, she shit the bed.

She left him, she left her job and refused to return any of his calls!

Conversation Topics for Online Dating

He was sat there, a broken man! Breakups are hard at the best of times, but to go through one whilst you were married was even harder.

As he sat there telling his story, each of use was glued. This wasn’t the typical chat we’d find at the Executive Game. It was way deeper. John continued bearing his soul until Jason spoke up. Jason was (and I suppose still is) African American. He was the coolest guy in the group, just like so cool, but he was also no nonsense. He was the guy that would tell us to get to the point! And today was no different.

He interrupted John and asked ‘so how did your wife catch you?’

‘She didn’t’ replied John.

Jason looked even more irritated, rushing to know the end. BTW Jason was also the guy who’d watch the last episode of any new show on Netflix before starting it from the beginning.

Jason started laughing ‘Bros, I’m so confused! Why are you getting a divorce?’

And this is when it really hit me. Because what he said next taught me and everyone so much about guilt.

John foolishly said ‘My wife didn’t catch me. I was so upset about my breakup that I told my wife all about the affair thinking it would make me feel better to come clean. And she just instantly asked for a divorce ………… and half of everything!’

The room erupted. We were all shouting at John at the same time, you could hear words like pussy, dickhead, idiot being thrown in his direction.

He just sat there, taking it all in! Finally, once the commotion had calmed down – I composed my myself.

‘John, why on earth, when you’ve gotten away with it, would you be stupid enough to confess.’

John was articulate. He did presentations for a living, and with those skills, he went on to calmly explain to us that the guilt was consuming him. Even whilst he was having the affair and getting carried away with it all – he just kept feeling like shit. That coupled with the fact that the breakup was tearing him apart, and it was clear both at work and at home that something was clearly wrong – he argued that he had no other option but to confess!

Now whilst it was clear that none of us really agreed with him, we also all acknowledged that he was a smart guy and made whatever decision he needed to make at the time.

But of course, that story stuck with me for months! John was smooth enough to have an affair, but not smart enough to manage his emotions.

Of course, whilst I was listening to his story, I too was having an affair at the same time. I couldn’t help be contemplative. The trouble is I never felt guilty.

I’m not sure if I was capable of guilt though. I’d been having affairs for so long, I still question myself. What time of disgusting person am I, that I can cheat so easily without even an ounce of guilt. Not even 1%. Am I soulesss? I’d love to tell you that I’m now so cool that it doesn’t bother me, but the truth is sometimes I think I’m broken inside.

That said, I couldn’t get my head around the fact that Johnny had confessed. And of course, therein lies the moral of his story. If guilt is going to consume you, if you are a really good person – then I hate to break it to you, cheating isn’t for you!

Later on that night, we carried on with our game. The mood was different, and all of us found ourselves not agreeing with John’s choices but we all felt sorry for him. I found myself folding trip Aces just so he would win. And he did. That night, we all unconsciously lost to John and he walked out feeling like a winner.

Until, Jason shouted from the back of the room:

‘Don’t forget to give your wife half’

Are You Still A Cheater If You’ve Never Been Caught

Why would someone write a blog on cheating? Well, here’s the thing, I’m a married man with 3 young kids and I cheat. There I said it. Let’s be honest it’s hardly something you can shout from the rooftops.

It’s an outlet for me. It’s a source of sanity and excitement mixed together.

And if I didn’t do it, I’d probably go mad. I find that cheating makes me a better husband and father.

I go out of my way to be discreet and yet, have somehow, after years of cheating, found myself in this bubble of having a few women on the go. It’s started to feel normal. Like there’s nothing wrong with it.

And I’d love to tell you I look like Don Juan (like the guy in the picture), or have a 6 pac, or drive a Ferrari – none of these are true.

I’m probably a 7/10 on my very best day! And that takes a haircut a week and 5 weekly visits to the gym.

I drive a Volvo – which fits all 3 car seats and I always always always go home at night.

I’m hardly the catch of the Century!

Nobody on planet Earth gets in the way of me making breakfast for my kids – it always reminds me of that scene in Casino, where DeNiro’s Character says about Pesci’s:

……but around 6:30 in the morning, when he finished his day no matter where he was or what he was doing he always went home to make breakfast for his son, Nicky boy.

Open Communication about Handling the Children

That was me, but without the racketeering or murder the night before. But for sure the womanising we had in common.

So how did it go from struggling to getting a girlfriend to juggling many women?

Keep reading, I share all. I will be posting a lot of blogs from which you’ll learn more about me than you’ll want to.

As the protagonist of the story – only you can tell me if I’m the good guy or the bad guy. If I deserve to get caught and have my affairs discovered or if I should keep doing what I’m doing.

Now please know this, at the end of this rainbow, there’s no red carpet.

There’s no Brad Pitt making a movie of my exploits.

I live in the shadows, discretion is key or the jig is up! This very blog is registered with a web design agency with whom I have an iron clad NDA with. I’m not looking for fame or notoriety. I’m not looking to ruin my marriage or those of others. I’m not looking to speak at conferences and do a book tour. That will never ever be the case! I want to remain in the background, whilst sharing my journey.

That said, there are a couple of my friends I do confide in. Partially to brag a little but also to heed their advice:

One of them keeps saying to me:

Be careful, in the end you’ll get caught

or

the truth will come out…

Which if you’re not careful, sloppy or just plain unlucky is true.

However, my rebuttal back is simply this; TV is full of shows where the title is Unsolved.

Unsolved Murder, Unsolved Heists, Unsolved UFO sightings – whatever.

And why is that?

Because they got away with it. It’s because the truth didn’t come out, and most likely the people involved took those secrets to their graves. Hence unsolved!

In fact it lead me to ask them a question of my own. And for you too, reading this, let me ask you:

If a tree falls in a forest does it make a sound? If someone is never caught stealing are they a thief? If someone is never caught cheating are they actually a cheater?

By definition when people use the words murderer, thief, cheater – there’s this assumption that they’ve been rumbled. Caught. Found out.

But what if that wasn’t the case? What would they be then?

For my marriage, my sanity comes from having an outlet. If no one finds out, what’s the harm?

No different from lying about going out with the boys for a few drinks after work, or smoking that joint on a night out.

My goal – and as terrible as this sounds, is to at least show you my journey. Everything from what I’m thinking, how to find women to have affairs with and how to get away with it.

I’m no god. I’m not a legend. I’ve just slowly started perfecting how it all works to be able to have the confidence and the know-how to even write all of this!

I learnt so much from the first time I cheated, 20 years ago. And in the last 20 years, I’ve learnt more and more. I’m a serial cheater – I get that.

And even whilst writing this, I know it’s wrong. I know if my wife or kids found out – it would break us as a family.

I would never sit here and say – go out and cheat! That’s not my goal.

My goal is to help you not get caught, not get careless, not fall for the side chick and give it all up.

If you’re already cheating, then really, you are my target audience. If you’re simply fascinated, then read this as a cautionary tale because let me tell you something they don’t always show in the movies – cheating isn’t for everyone.

Beyond all the texts, and butterflies, and sex – there’s an emotional toll. And you have to learn to deal with that, or it’s going to be obvious the second you get home!

Your wife will sense it, your kids will sense it – shoot, I’ve even seen guys come home and just confess their sins because they couldn’t live with the guilt.

This game isn’t for everyone, and it’s certainly no game! The stakes are high, the risk is high! And yes, for me the reward at the end of it is worth it, but I’ve developed the stomach for this!

If fascination is your thing, and living vicariously through some of my stories makes for good reading – then buckle up bitches, cos we’re in for a good time!

How to Convince a Woman to Cheat with You

How to Convince a Woman to Cheat with You

Thinking about cheating on your other half? Get ready to learn how to lie. You’ll need endless excuses to get out of the house to meet up with your side piece. Of course, you’ll also need to actually get the attention of another woman in the first place. If you’re not too concerned about striking up a personal connection, this is fairly easy. Dating apps for affairs and hook sites make it easy to find someone focused solely on quick sex with no questions asked. However, some men prefer more of a challenge.

Perhaps you’ve got your eye on a new co-worker. Maybe there’s a woman at the gym who’s turned your head more than once. It’s easy enough to break the ice with casual conversation, but moving things up a notch and convincing a woman to cheat with you is a different matter entirely. Need some tips on how to convince a woman to commit to an affair? Read on for everything you need to know.

Is She Already Taken? How To Get A Girl To Cheat

Most men looking to cheat keep things simple and seek out unattached singles. This way, you’re not competing with the attention of other men. Sometimes, it’s easier to seek out married women looking for no-strings thrills outside of the marital bed. However, there may come a time when someone catches your eye, only for you to find out they’re already involved with someone. Unless they’ve got a history of cheating, it can be difficult to convince a married woman or someone in a long-term relationship to do the dirty on their spouse. It’s not always easy, but by turning to a few tried and tested tactics, you can increase your odds of landing your next hookup.

Is it Okay to Cheat with Someone in a Relationship?

Don’t lose too much sleep over the fact you’re chasing a woman who’s involved with someone. If she’s giving even the slightest indication she might be interested in you, you’re not crossing any major boundaries. We’re not living in the Middle Ages anymore. Adultery might be a crime in more backward corners of the world, but the urge to play away is entirely natural.

What’s more, if you’re looking to broaden your horizons, you’ll want to cast the net wide and expand your pool to include attached women. The best candidates have almost always been snapped up already. Don’t see this as a barrier to getting your own way. Instead, think of it as a challenge.

Getting a vibe that she might be interested in you? If she’s only slightly considering cheating on her partner, she’ll do it sooner or later. Better with you than with someone else.

How to Spot a Potential Cheater

How to Spot a Potential Cheater

Before you start wasting time convincing a woman to have an affair with you, take a moment to think about why they might be looking to cheat in the first place. Sometimes, a woman might not be getting it at home. If you have your eye on a sex-starved married woman, you won’t have to do too much convincing to get them into bed. Sometimes, a woman might simply be lonely, even if she’s been attached for months, if not years. These are ideal targets if you’re looking for extramarital encounters.

Is someone in your social circle running their spouse down in conversation? Many women aren’t afraid of letting people know just how little they think of their spouse. If a co-worker or casual acquaintance isn’t holding back when it comes to shitting on their spouse in conversation, you’ve got a clear opening. Chances are, they’re not looking for reassurances about their relationship. More likely, they’re throwing out an invitation and looking for a bite.

Convincing Them to Cheat….How To Make A Girl Cheap?

Lined up a target? Now you can start putting the moves on them to convince them to cheat with you. Some men avoid pursuing married women. Extramarital affairs can get messy, especially if both parties are hitched, but an unhappy wife is usually far easier to play than a free and easy singleton.

Getting Married Women to Cheat

Getting Married Women to Cheat

Women in unhappy marriages and long-term relationships tend to suffer from low self-esteem. If they’re getting little in the way of emotional support and intimacy at home, they’re ripe for the picking. You have got a couple of options here. If you’re feeling brave, move right on in at the perfect time and let them know you’re in the market for sex. If you’re happy to play the long game, build them up a little. Let them know they’re worth more than a sexless marriage and reinforce the idea that they’re worth far more than what they’re getting at home.

If you’re going the long way round, be prepared to do your fair share of listening. And we say listen, we mean it. Listen to their gripes about their home lives. Make sure you’re taking stock of the things they’re unhappy about. This information is gold dust. When the times come to play your cards, you’ll need to draw on all of this to win them over.

If she’s been suffering in silence for a long time and hasn’t yet strayed from her spouse, don’t expect to get what you’re after immediately. It might take weeks, if not months to convince them to get down and dirty with you. Wait until she starts giving you telltale signals that she wants to take things to the next step. Are your interactions becoming more physical? Is she being more loaded with her compliments? You’re now in a strong position to lay everything out on the table.

Getting Single Women to Cheat

Not every woman you’ll be interested in will be attached to a boyfriend or husband. However, if they know you’re involved with someone yourself, it’s not as easy as letting them know you’re up for sex.

Convincing a single woman to play the role of a sidepiece can be difficult, especially if they’re a colleague or someone within your social circle. Thankfully, there’s a lot you can do to sweeten the deal and increase your odds of getting an affair off the ground.

If you have your sights on someone, make sure you’re working your own relationship gripes into casual conversation. Avoid overloading exchanges with complaints. Play too hard here and you may come across as unreasonable. Instead, put the aim on your other half. Mention how your schedule is being monitored. Let your prospective sex partner know you get little time to yourself.

You can blur the lines between reality and fantasy here. If you’re genuinely stuck in a rut at home, you’ve plenty of information to draw on. However, if you’re simply looking to get more sex, you can get creative when buttering up a prospective side piece.

Some singles will love the thrill of being the other woman. However, others are going to approach the issue with more caution. If they’re not involved with someone else themselves, they don’t stand to lose much. That being said, they probably don’t want to get branded a slut for playing around with someone else’s man. If you think sex is on the cards, let them know you’re looking for discretion and that this goes both ways.

Where to Find the Best Cheating Prospects

If you’re looking to chase sex outside of your relationship, you’ll first need to find a willing partner. Sometimes, you’ll happen upon the ideal candidate by chance. However, some men need to go out of their way to find someone willing to engage in an affair. Need some pointers? Below, we’ve outlined some of the best avenues worth exploring for men looking to cheat.

Reconnect with an Ex

This might seem like a dangerous route to take and some friends will tell you that you’re playing with fire. If your current spouse knows about your ex, they’re probably already wary of you making contact with them. However, a background level of suspicion isn’t the same as actively scouring your social media accounts for telltale exchanges or monitoring your texts.

Ex-partners are a great place to start if you’re having trouble finding a woman who’s happy to cheat with you. In an ideal world, you’ll be dealing with an ex who hasn’t quite gotten over you. Just approach with caution. Make sure any relationship is limited to sex and physical encounters. Once feelings start coming into play, you leave yourself open to emotional blackmail and, before you know it, you’re entering Fatal Attraction territory.

Has an ex kept in contact with you since the relationship ended? Test the waters to see what they’re actually after. If reconnecting and casual sex comes up in conversation, take the next steps and arrange a meeting. Keep it casual with drinks and, if the topic turns toward sex, move things forward.

Workplace Affairs

Workplace Affairs

The majority of affairs start life at the office. In fact, it’s thought that as many as 85% of affairs begin as workplace-based relationships. Most people spend just as much time with co-workers as with their families. If you’re working a full-time job and putting in countless hours of overtime, it’s easy to build strong relationships with co-workers. The good news for men looking to cheat is that more time at the office usually gives you a clear idea of which women at your workplace are likely to cheat.

Managing a workplace affair can be messy, especially if there’s an eventual fallout. To make life easier, approach a workplace affair with a degree of professionalism, no matter how hot and steamy the sexual side of things is. The good thing about a workplace affair is that, should one of you eventually break it off, the other party is going to want to save face. There’s not likely to cause a scene in front of colleagues if things go south. If they do, they run the risk of damaging their reputation and, in a worst-case scenario, force themselves into a situation where they have to leave.

Fellow Gym Users

The gym is the perfect place to find someone for no-strings sex and casual encounters. For starters, it’s easy to escape without drawing too much suspicion from your other half. Most gyms are open around the clock, meaning you won’t have to come up with last-minute excuses about where you’ve been.

Obviously, most people who hit the gym are there to work on their bodies. However, there’s an element of vanity to most gym visits. Men and women alike like to showcase their physical assets in public and the gym is one of the few places where you can do so unashamedly. These peacocking public displays often turn heads. Sometimes, this recognition is innocent enough. Other times, it’s more loaded.

If you’re getting regular attention from the same person, take the next steps and make contact. Roll out your usual icebreakers to get the conversation started. If the compliments are forthcoming and the tone is loose enough, don’t be afraid to be more upfront. Gym users with no boundaries aren’t going to be too worried about where they undress and go at it. As such, gym restrooms and shower cubicles provide the perfect venue for clinches. However, if you’ve made a connection in the middle of the day, it’s best to take the action elsewhere. Suggest heading out for a drink after you’ve finished your workout and take it from there.

Make Life Easy and Head Online

Make Life Easy and Head Online

If you want to keep things streamlined, head online. Many dating apps are free to use and, provided you’re making use of anonymity features, you can use them without attracting suspicion from your other half. Hookup sites like Ashley Madison (Ashley Madison Tips: The Ultimate Playbook for Online Dating Success) are also worth exploring, especially if you’re looking for no-strings sex and don’t want to explain yourself.

Even if you’re dealing with someone who promises discretion, you’ll need to be a bit cautious. Extend your search radius so you’re not shitting on your own doorstep. You don’t want to walk past a one-time squeeze in the street while you’re out shopping with your wife or girlfriend.

How to Convince a Woman to Cheat with You

Convincing a woman to abandon her morals and cheat with you isn’t rocket science. However, different women require a different approach. If you’re targeting a married woman at the office, a delicate touch is needed. You’ll also need to be patient, preying on self-esteem issues and playing up your own virtues. If you’re looking for single women to have sex with, things are simpler. If they know you’re involved with someone, you’ll still need to put in the work to convince them you’re not a complete dirtbag. What’s more, even the most open-minded side piece is going to expect a level of discretion from your arrangement.