How to Pickup MILFs | My Step By Step Formula
Maybe it’s me, but whenever I hear the term MILF, even to this day I can’t help but think of Stifler’s Mom from American Pie. She was the epitome of what a good looking MILF would look like in those days. Of course, if you don’t know what a MILF is, check out what it means here.
Since then, MILFs have become even more stunning. Ladies of lunch have been replaced by women going to the gym and ageing down through exercise, yoga and sometimes a little botox.
Personally, I’ve always been into older women. Even when I was single. There is always something so attractive about them, the maturity, the experience the ‘having gone around the block‘ that younger women just don’t have.
Dating Younger Guys Is Now Cool
What’s become so fascinating is whenever I read the entertainment section of various magazines, what was frowned upon years ago, has now become the norm. And that is older women stepping out with young guys. It’s almost like it’s sense of achievement older women have garnered. The most famous of course of them being Marcon and his wife. She used to be his teacher and now she’s married to him.
And just when I thought I was alone, the trend amongst many younger guys is to bag themselves or at least have an experience with an older woman. And I can tell you from firsthand experience, it’s the best. Of course I’m never going to not admit that having fun with younger 20 something year old hotties isn’t fun too, but once you’ve actually slept with them a couple of times, their inexperience in that department is super evident.
The Difference Between A Milf And A Cougar
- Now I could be entirely wrong here, but from my own adventures with both, cougars revel in the attention and often go out of their way to land guys younger than them. Whilst MILFs are just very attractive mums that don’t seek out relationships or the attention. Cougars are a bit like me, they go through relationships faster than you can imagine, validating their good lucks by dating different guys.
- Cougars are substantially easier to pickup too. They’re out at night, partying with the youngsters, acting like they’re teenagers again, wearing very suggestive clothing and actively looking to get hit on. With the right Cougar if there’s an attraction, you can buy them a drink and before you know it you’re in the cab on the way back to theirs. You’ll catch them at lady’s night of most clubs and they very sexually liberated. They’re less into the talking and more interested in the sex only. And for the most part, Cougars factor your age into everything. For them to feel validated, they prefer guys substantially younger than them – the younger the guy the greater the achievement. So if you’re a young guy, looking to pick up older women, Cougars are 100% the way to go.
- Cougars are very proud of being cougars, they bask in knowing that younger men want to sleep with them. And the ones I’ve slept with are generally divorced. They’re also experts in getting married guys to chase them.
- MILFs on the other hand are quite the opposite. They’re more often shy, and even if they’re drop dead attractive, they still somehow convince themselves that they’re really not. They’re not into chasing or being chased by guys and most of them are so into their families that to convince them to have a relationship let alone an affair is so far out of the realm of possibility for them.
- A Cougar is proud of her age, a MILF is conscious of her age.
- You’ll never catch a MILF out in a club (rarely), let alone on dating sites or dating apps. They’re not at all susceptible to flirting and cheesy pickup lines have no effect on them. MILFs have huge emotional maturity and will always pick hanging out with their kids than hanging out with friends. When a young men try and hit on MILFs – they tend not to get very far, and MILFs (unlike cougars) – will laugh it off and say things like ‘oh you’re sweet‘ or the classic ‘I’m old enough to be your mother‘.
Whilst older women can be hot as hell, many of them looking dramatically younger than they really are, they tend to either fall into either the MILF camp or the cougar camp. And given guys like me love the chase, want that emotional attachment as well as the physical, MILFs are a far better choice.
Where To Find These MILFs
So where do you find these MILFs if they’re not hitting the town at night or doing the whole online dating thing. Well of course they go out, but you’re hardly going to be able to pick them up on a mum’s night out. Just imagine how quickly that would get back to her husband, her chatting to you. No, you have to be smarter than that:
- School Gates – if you’re a married man like me, with young kids, chances are you’ll always meet MILFs during the school drop offs or school pickups. It’s a non threatening environment, and whilst you may not be able to approach some of these attractive mums randomly, the school is the perfect place. Because the one thing you’ll have in common is that your kids attend the same place. It’s easy to start a conversation be it about the kids, the school or even having a little bitch about either the teachers or some of the more weird parents. In fact that last MILF I had a fling with, this is exactly where I met her. We saw each other twice a day for months to the point that it was normal to speak as much as we did.
- In the park walking the dog – I live in a part of the world where I’m next to several parks. And every day I see older, attractive women out there walking their dogs. In fact they’re so regimented about their timings that you can almost bank your watch on it. So if you don’t happen to have a dog, borrow one. If you can’t, be sure to be exercising around the same time everyday so that you become a familiar face. Easier to say hi and strike up a conversation from there.
- The gym – after dropping of the kids, a heck of a lot of MILFs head to the gym. They’re more conscious about their weight and pyshcique than they ever have been and so many have become so disciplined they look better now than they did before having kids. I did discuss this in a post on how to pick up married women at the gym because for me, I’ve had THE MOST success in this area.
- Supermarkets – you tend to see a lot of MILFs doing their weekly or daily shop at the same supermarket. Now whilst I’ve never tried or had success hitting on women in the supermarket (only because I find it’s a bit too intrusive) I’ve heard of plenty of success stories from men that have had huge success here. They’ve found that women seem to be less guarded, easier to get eye contact and strike up a conversation. I live in hope that this happens for me one day.
- Work – lots of women work. And many of them are married with kids. The fact that they work in an office tends to mean that they’re very well dressed and pay huge attention to looking on point. Having an affair with a co-worker is so common. If you think about how much time you spend at work it’s not abnormal to become very attached to people in your office. Some of my best flings have derived from some of the women I’ve met at work.
That’s just to name a few, but there’s always shopping malls, health food shops, the beach, the car wash, etc, etc, etc…
Things To Appreciate About Older Women (especially if they’re married).
What I love about MILFs is that they don’t always know they’re hot. It’s rare that their husband tells them they are, and the truth is, if you’ve been married for a while there’s a strong chance that life and kids and everything else has taken front and centre.
It’s rare for them to feel sexy or to even get a meaningful conversation with their significant other because everyone’s always rushing around, working or exhausted. They don’t get to spend as much alone time with their partners as they used to and visits to the local bar are very infrequent.
In fact, like for so many people out there, life has become monotonous. It’s got a routine. And whilst a MILF may walk the dog and do school runs and the shopping and maybe even go to work – there’s still something that’s very routine about it. Having kids will force a routine into your life because it’s exactly what they need.
My System On Picking Up MILFs
Before I share my system, let me just say this is unique to me. You’re more than welcome to copy me if you think you can pull it off. In writing this piece, I did a cursory glance around the internet and as usual found one article with tips (which were too general and too generic) – and then a whole bunch of other articles that simply re-wrote and reworded the same article. To be really honest, when I read every other article on internet about how to date MILFs, I found that they just had been written from a place of theory. It struck me that most if not all of the authors and no real world experience in the real world on how to pick up hotter, older, attractive women.
My advice to you is follow my structure a bit, but stick to your strengths. So if you’re funny, be funny, if you’re handsome, play on that, if you’re sporty, play on that, etc, etc, etc..
My Approach – AIDA
I pick up women the same way I do deals in business, by following the simple steps of AIDA. Attention, interest, decision, action.
It’s hard to get someone to jump into the sack with you if you can’t get their attention, then garner their interest, then lead them into making a decision (eg having a drink – dinner) with you and them taking action (going all the way).
How To Pickup MILFs – My System
It’s my nature to chat to anyone. I’m a chatty person. I could strike up a conversation with a tree if I had to, and boy oh boy, after a few drinks you’d be hard pressed to shut me up. I also happen to think I’m pretty funny. I pride myself on making people laugh. And it doesn’t hurt that I’m uber perscitpive. Like frighteningly perceptive.
So I take these 3 qualities and I put them to good use.
Attention
So here’s what I do, I make sure I chat to someone who is used to seeing me daily. If it’s a MILF I’m after, I stick to the school gate or the gym. It’s where I have had my biggest luck.
I start by making sure I get their attention. Whether it’s a smile, a hello or small talk. And every day I see them, I make sure I’m consistent. Part of my process is to go from being a random guy to a familiar face. In the early days whatever I do, I don’t rush in and have these huge chats or get them laughing – NO SIR. All I do is make sure I just being familiar.
Interest – Flattery
Backhanded compliments get you everywhere. Remember married women don’t get hit on that much and chances are their own husbands will rarely compliment them. Making them feel attractive is going to get you very far. And so for me, I love using flattery, but not outright compliments but slight ones. For example I took my kids to football practice the other day. There’s this one Pervy horrendous dad always diving in to talk to the mums. Well he actually focuses on the nannies but sometimes he talks to the mums. So I met this one mum there that I was totally besotted with. She would see me every Saturday and like I mentioned above, I’d always make a point of saying hello and smiling at her. After a few Saturdays, I was no longer some random person.
Somehow we got into a conversation and I pointed out this creepy guy to her. I made some jokes about him, she laughed. Then I turned to her and asked her if he had started to hit on her yet. She quizzically looked at me and shook her head.
I then said:
“I’m really surprised, he always hits on all the hot women”
And there it was, I called her hot without quite saying I find you hot. I noticed her blushing ever so slightly and the second she did, I asked which coffee she wanted from the coffee cart.
From then on every Saturday it went from chit chat, to both of us looking forward to seeing each other, to her saving me a chair next to her and waiting for me. All this in just a few weeks. I always paid her compliments on her shoes or her clothes, or the type of mother she was, but again, not always overt.
Then, the next step in my process is to talk outside of seeing each other. And that means Instagram. I’d always make sure they’d give me their Instagram handle and I’d get them to follow me back whilst I was there.
Each day I’d post or reshare other people’s stories and check to see if they were watching. Instagram allows you to see who sees your stories and for me that was a further sign they were interested. I may forward them something of interest to them and see if they respond, etc..
All of these are signs that there’s some level of interest. It may not be romantic yet, but I’ve come a long way from being a random guy.
Decision – Time To Introduce A Bit More
Now here comes the hard bit.
I start to confide in them. I’d be totally honest with them about being married. I’d tell them that I cheat, I explain why and I’d make a point of saying I preferred only younger women.
I know all this sounds crazy. But once there’s a certain level of familiarity and trust there, I start with this confession. I explain that I love the attention, how I love my family, but I need that bit extra outside of my marriage. I tell her that I’d never leave my wife, but whilst my kids are young it’s only fair they get most of her attention.
Interestingly, what typically happens is a few things:
Now a few things can happen here. Firstly they become completely shocked and almost turn religious on me and try and fix me. They’ll advise I need counselling or therapy. They live in this idealistic world of what marriage should be and try and impose that on me. If this happens, I know nothing will ever happen for a while with them and me. It can later by the odds are hugely diminished.
OR
Fascination takes over:
- They become TOTALLY curious: Chances are they are so fascinated and ask me so many questions like, why, how, where and how do I get away with it, etc…
- Fascinated: They want to here all the stories of the women, the escapades, what I say, how I do it – they want to almost live vicariously through my stories.
- Younger Women: Even through it’s not true, I want them to feel relaxed around me and so I make a point of saying that I only date younger women, single women.
I then amp up the communication on Instagram – every now and then I may send them a good morning message, or a good night message – I get to the point where I send daily messages and so that they’re now used to it. It’s become normal to communicate with me normally. I may even send them profiles of younger looking women and asking them for advice on how to bag them… (all part of the plan).
After a bit of time, they’ve gone from not knowing me, to looking forward to our chats to almost expecting it. Without even realising it, I’ve become a daily part of their life.
At this point, they may even start telling me more about their life and sharing their problems with me. I become their shoulder, their confidant, someone they’ll run ideas past. At this point we’re micro cheating and almost verging on having an emotional affair.
Action – Time To Make A Move
What happens next is, unless I take action, push for a drink or dinner, I will stay in this no mans land or friend zone. I need a sign that she’s ready to take it forward a bit more.
It’s time to suggest dinner or food. Anything to get her out alone with you.
Remember, once you’re out for dinner or drinks at a discreet bar – it’s all about flirting.
The smiles, the gentle touches – the odd sexual innuendo. She’s only there because she’s fascinated, wants you to make a move and knows that you know how to have affairs discreetly and not get caught. She wants to be guided into this world by someone who’s successful in it.
And just by mentioning you prefer younger women is in some strange way going to make her fight for your attention and make you see her as attractive as a younger woman. She wants to know that her age is not a factor and she’ll work very hard to ensure that she looks her very best. Plus, her body language will tell you whether you should be making a move to kiss her or not.
Be observant and pay attention to the signs. She’s there for a reason. And if she’s lied to her husband about where she is then that’s an even bigger sign she wants you to make a move.
Things I Never Do To Keep A MILF Into Me
- I rarely talk about mention my wife.
- I never ask or respond to things she says about her husband. In my mind he doesn’t exist.
In Conclusion
A young man will rarely have the patience to go after a MILF. If they like an older woman a Cougar is a far easier to close than a MILF. They have to wait less and given we live in an instant society, waiting weeks or months to bed a MILF may just be too hard. Especially when younger guys are used to dealing with young girls. Remember to learn what older women want in bed, and it’s not what you think.
There’s no easy way to pick up a MILF. It’s a process. And convincing someone to have an affair with you is going to take some time. It’s a matter of patience. Have faith in the knowledge that somethings really do take time. But believe you me, the relationship with a MILF is the best type of relationship you can have.
That said, there’s of course a risk. You don’t want to damage lives and you need to make sure both you and her are careful. You don’t want to get caught. It’s a balancing act.
I wish I told you I had an easy answer in how to pickup MILFs – but whenever I’ve rushed it in the past they’ve just shut down and seen me as sleazy. Play it cool, be cool, be kind, observant, flattering and genuine and it’ll happen.
Most women want attention and want to feel sexy, despite their age or what she’s wearing. Knowing and appreciating this will get you having relationships with women you never thought possible.
My Go-To Platform for Flings, Affairs, and MILFs
Looking for top-notch flings, affairs, or MILFs? Skip the rest, AdultFriendFinder is the gold standard. Zero bots, zero fakes—just real connections. I've scored big in multiple cities. Sign up now, it's FREE!