The Benefits Of Having An Affair With A Married Person
Let’s for a second assume you’re single. Let’s assume that you’ve hit all the usual dating sites and some of the men you’ve met are, to plainly put it, weird. They’re too crud, they’re childish, have shit jobs, don’t look the part, creepy and worse. Then what?
What if, the right person that you meet by chance at the gym is married. But despite that you’re hugely attracted to them. That person has their shit together, they’re mature, focused, attractive, calm and so much more. They tick every single box, except one – they’re married. They’re loyal to their spouse, they’re great to their kids, they’re accomplished in their work. There’s no chance of a happily ever after, and despite that – they tick every single box….
Then what?
Why People Engage In Affairs
People have affairs for a variety of reasons. Here are some of them:
Unmet emotional needs: Individuals may seek out affairs when their emotional needs aren’t being met in their current relationship. They might crave validation, affection, or emotional support that they aren’t receiving from their partner. Which is sometimes why emotional affairs are so common.
Physical dissatisfaction: Some people engage in affairs due to dissatisfaction with their physical or sexual relationship with their partner. They may be seeking variety, excitement, or a renewed sense of passion.
Low self-esteem: Individuals with low self-esteem may seek out affairs as a way to boost their confidence and self-worth. The attention and validation they receive from a new partner can temporarily provide an ego boost.
Boredom: For some, affairs can provide an escape from the monotony of daily life or a long-term relationship. The excitement and novelty of an affair can be a powerful draw for those who feel bored or unfulfilled in their current situation.
Lack of communication: Poor communication in a relationship can lead to unresolved conflicts and unmet needs. This, in turn, can cause individuals to seek solace and understanding outside of their relationship.
Revenge: In some cases, people have affairs as a form of retaliation against a partner who has cheated or otherwise hurt them. This “eye-for-an-eye” approach can be driven by anger and a desire to make their partner feel the same pain they experienced.
Personal issues: Sometimes, people have affairs as a way to cope with personal issues or insecurities, such as a fear of commitment, a desire for validation, or unresolved emotional trauma.
Opportunity: In some cases, affairs simply occur because the opportunity presents itself, and the individual chooses to act on their desires without considering the consequences.
The Benefits Of Having An Affair With A Married Person
No Baggage
But if you’re single, didn’t intend to set out on finding an affair, and accidentally find yourself entangled with someone married – then from firsthand experience, I can tell you the best benefit of it all is the no baggage. When I had my first affair, I was single and she was happily married. Because I was single, I felt that I wasn’t the one having an affair, she was. But of course, by definition that’s wrong. We were having an affair, we just weren’t in a relationship. I got all the best bits of her, the attention, the sex, the joys – without the headaches that relationships can bring.
Companionship
There’s something about having an affair that’s the perfect match of being single and being in a relationship. Being lonely sucks. It really does. And having an affair with a married person, gives you the perfect amount of companionship to take the sting out of being single or lonely.
Variety Of Sexual Experience
Let’s be fair, there’s something about having an affair with someone where the sex is simply amazing. Affairs are one of the greatest forms of escapism. It gives you a chance to often role play and play out some of your greatest sexual fantasies.
Makes You Feel Alive
There’s something about keeping a secret of an affair that’s insane. You’re almost walking round with a super power but you can’t tell anyone. People will notice your glow and a bounce to your step. Affairs make you feel alive. It’s hard to describe the feeling an affair gives you, but when you’re in one, it’s beyond words.
How To Find Affairs
If you’re a woman, it’s a lot easier for you to hook up with a married man that it is for a man to hook up with a married woman. That’s a fact. Women will always have a sexual allure that men (married or not) – just can’t resist. Whether you meet them at the gym, the supermarket, Instagram, etc… Women will always will have the upper hand in bagging a married man. However, a smart married man will only have an affair with a married woman who knows the rules. Someone who is not too wanting, discreet, understands that a married man will never leave his wife.
For a man to have an affair with a married woman, takes a little bit more effort. My preferred route is always using websites designed for people to have affairs. Sites like Ashley Madison (Learn the Art of Attraction: Ashley Madison Tricks Uncovered) and Adult Friend Finder are always great options. Men will find it harder than women to have affairs, but nights out, bars, even tinder are always great options. Just because it’s harder, doesn’t mean it’s impossible. It just means it takes a bit more work. Married women, for the most part, find it surprising that men can find them attractive after they’re married, especially if they have kids. It takes time for men to pierce that.
Tips For Having A Discreet Affair
When you’re having an affair, the number one rule, the single more important rule is that you never get caught. It’s not fair that there are casualties. Families can not get caught up in your mess and discretion is key. No one can ever get caught, not you, not your affair partner. Infidelity has ruined enough marriages, and doesn’t need your carelessness to add to that statistic (20-40% of marriages end because of cheating). Here are some tips to ensure that you remain discreet:
No Evidence
Make sure you are communicating with your affair partner without leaving a trace. Whether you are using various apps that self delete messages or simply manually deleting as you go along. Nothing is worse than getting away with an affair, then getting caught by pure slopiness after the fact.
Location
What gets people caught in affairs is bad luck or bad choices. Going to a restaurant or hotel where you are likely to bump into someone is a recipe for disaster. It’s best to go to places where no one you know would go. It’s important to find locations that are far enough out the way but also easy to get to. Nothing is more mortifying than you walking through the lobby hand in hand with your married affair partner than you bumping into her brother in law, or her husband’s best friend, or worse – his parents. Be smart.
Guilt
Never let your guilt overtake you. Can you imagine, you’ve gone to great lengths to have an affair, going so far out the way even the CIA wouldn’t find you – just to allow guilt to takeover and you end up confessing to someone and Chinese whispers takes over. You have to be able to manage your emotions during an affair, and accept something that’s sounds so obvious – a married person is never going to leave their family for you. It’s important to know this going in. Even if you end up falling in love and you are dreading that the affair breakup will be brutal. You must know this going into it.
Conclusion
Whether you are single or married and having an affair, I have to admit it’s a remarkable experience. Its escapism at its finest. You can just be and not try and as long as no one gets caught, and you don’t fall too deep, too fast – it’s something that will change you for the better. You will feel more alive than ever before. Just don’t get caught, don’t get sloppy and whatever you do – don’t let your emotions take over.
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